I think my 13 yr old has depression, what more can i do.

[imjustahead]

She has a history of illness, emotional and physical problems.

We went to the gp last summer after she had totally broken down for two weeks. Not speaking, crying, feeling empty and pointless etc...

At that time, told to give it time.

In the first term of school (yr8) she had one week off because of severe anxiety, and feelings like i described above. Saw GP, who said, yes anxiety, and gave us a sick note for school.
Two weeks ago she said the feelings are coming back. I gave it time, but took her back to gp (for once our regular gp) who suggested exercise, and online site living life to the full.
I did ask about anti depressants, mentioned Prozac but was told they could in fact cause suicidal thoughts. (I mentioned Prozac specifically as I read that it is the one that is preferred in young adults/children). So she said the exact opposite to what I had read.

The feelings stem, mainly from a long history of problems with her father (ex dh), who has never stepped up, or who has for a time then disappeared out of her life.
I just want to know what more i can do.

There is history of depression in our family, I was a depressed child and am very adamant my dd will not be left to flounder as i was.
I have had antidepressants in early 20's and they helped me so much.
I don't want dd to go on them, but who knows, they could be a real help.

She has had periods for two years now, and generally she has good friends, is lively, fun and bright. It breaks my heart to see her like this.

GP said, to come back in a month.

What more could be done through the NHS? GP said that in any case she (gp) wouldn't be allowed to prescribe any meds.
I read about Cambhs on here, and it never gets a good press.
Would they have to be invloved before dd gets assessed for ad's? I mean how much longer can this go on.

thankyou x

hello there, thanks for your reply.

Our Youth advisory closed down two yrs ago, i live in a rural place. Private is something i did think of but wanted to get in the system first as i am a lone parent on benefits, with no contact with the ex/dd's father.

My biggest shock form this was the way the counsellor spoke really, not sure she is a counsellor anyway.
dd told me last night that she actually said, there are people with worse problems than you. Which is a disgusting thing to say, in any capacity to someone of this age with problems that are severe.

On our first meeting the woman seemed fairly responsive towards dd's life and the trauma. It's like she's gone away, had a meeting decided dd isn't suicidal (yet) so doesn't need to chat. DD needs to talk to someone, only seen once, apart from initital meeting.

dd knocked for six today, but am trying to encourage her to forget about this blip. We will just keep going.

Always ask their title and expertise.its maddening that tgey never offer this information.Couple of thoughts.consider a private assessment.Specialist adolescent therapists based at Priory adolescent units work with NHS and private patients so are listened to by Camhs or see an educational psychologist who will help ascertain if she has ASD traits via a test like Wisc4. Sounds like you need ammunition.get letters from school to and write to the lead psychiatrist at Camhs explaining you are concerned your dd is struggling and is at riskand request a second opinion .iIf the person you saw wasn't a trained psychotherapist or psychologist that's concerning and even if she is doesn't sound like the right person..As others say funding cuts have made it necessary to fight even harder..but from all your posts it sounds like she needs will benefit from professional support.

She is a 'Primary Mental Health Care Worker'

says on the report of the initial assessment, where she's taken alot of notes, and got it all pretty spot on.

Yet going by some of the questions she asked dd yesterday, she hadn't bothered looking at the report she wrote. Maybe she mixed up the files eh.

She actually told dd there are people out there worse off than her.
I went into detail on the first assessment of dd's health problems, yesterday she asked me some questions which i answered which seemed to surprise her, as tho she had never fucking met me before.

I hope to god we get some sort of feedback from the email.

dd slid backwards today. shameful.

Have you tried regular sport? It could genuinely help. Write a list of sports and see if any interest her and then research and sign up to the one that does and that trains 4 times a week or more. Triathlon, dancing, trampolining, rowing, running, swimming, orienteering, netball, hockey, cheerleading, ice hockey etc etc. The physical exercise, camaraderie and achievement could really help build self esteem and also distract her from sad thoughts.

the initial form says, ' 6 sessions with me before she goes on a cbt group course'

she's now said it's 1 more. the course isn't until July. dd hasn't voiced any of her problems to this woman yet.

she even had to fill in a sad face happy face assessment on how the meeting had gone in front of this woman. she circled happy faces because she was too scared otherwise.

dd isn't a sport type person, prefers arts and music.

Some form of exercise could really help though. Walking, yoga or Pilates maybe? Really gets the endorphins going, plus yoga has all the elements of balancing mind, body and soul. I know your dd may need medication but some kind of regular physical exercise could really help too.

A few things: if the assessment /questionnaire that highlighted separation anxiety as the main problem was called the RCADS then the practitioners should know (but probably don't) that the measure always over estimates separation anxiety and it's a fault in the measure that the developers are aiming to correct in the future. High separation anxiety scores should always be interpreted with caution. Also the RCADS is not a diagnostic tool and shouldn't be used as such.

You daughter should not be completing the satisfaction questionnaire (smiley faces) with the practitioner in the room. Basic stuff.

I would also echo what others have said about you encouraging your daughter to get involved in some kind of group activities - could be sports or just something for now. CAMHS can and likely will help but they are extremely overstretched and under resourced, funding has been stripped away by this government and staff are struggling to help children and families. Unfortunately they do have to prioritise the most risky people, that's just how it is at the moment and it's such a shame. What this means is that you as her mother will need to research yourself how to help her and work your socks off doing this and not just put your faith in camhs, medication, or anyone else. It may well be a long journey, so read up and inform yourself as best you can. Good luck!

ovumahead, you seem to have some great knowledge of the Camhs system, thankyou.

dd is attending a few school subjects, but has low mood and high anxiety so it's being staggered. This has taken a few months to work up to.

If this test isn't meant to be a diagnostic, it baffles me why it was used as one and presented to us as the answer. Totally ridiculous, and maybe that's why it seems wrong. Missing the point entirely really.
The smiley face test, why on earth would she be put through that in front of the health worker. What's the point of any of this i ask myself.

I have done more work with her, i don't really think Camhs are going to help are they. so fed up. DD hasn't been well since january now, i am so tired.

You will just need to keep nagging and badgering CAMHS for help! Also I would Google local charities and other organisations that could offer support. There's likely to be something even if you're rural. Are the school supporting you / her in any way?

Or national organisations who can put you in touch with local help if there is any.

I live in the capital, and found no charities who could offer practical therapeutic support for teens so not sure if there is specialist support rurally. If you can afford it and your DD can cope , I would try to get a second opinion (especially if they said she will be discharged) with a private adolescent psychotherapist or psychiatrist(often senior therapists working at private adolescent units like the priory, have their own private patients, as well as working with NHS patients,so camhs will listen to them ). I found an educational psychologists report (wisc4) helped with support . You need an experienced adolescent psychotherapist/psychiatrist in CAMHS to assess in my opinion. I'm not sure if a Primary health care worker is a psychology graduate ?. Keep pushing by explaining she really isn't coping and if possible, help her communicate that herself.

Yes I'm not sure if many charities offer therapy, although I'm sure some offer counselling but this is not the same. Many will be able to offer advice, guidance, maybe some activities etc which could be very useful.

My 13yr old ds has just started saying he doesn't want to go to school - and meaning it. He's never liked it, but his mood is really low and negative at the moment. So much so, one of his teachers rang last week to ask if all was ok. I had already said that I was going to speak to the school but he had begged me not to. Obviously we need to do this now.

It's so difficult to know how to tackle it. He has no real problems, is popular at school, yet is just not happy. He has never really been what you would call a sunny child, but it seems to have reached crisis point. How we react now may be crucial.

We need to help him now before it gets to some of the points that your kids have got to. Some of your stories are heartbreaking.

Will wait to see what the school says.

Thank you to everyone for sharing your experiences and I've also come very late to this thread.

I have a 12 year old daughter who is very down and anxious, very shy and introvert and not very good in social situations, always physically feeling ill and has had to cope with her brothers aspergers, violence and now her dad's slow rejection of her (he has a new family) and slowly losing interest in her and she has hit rock bottom.

I'm going in to school tomorrow to see if I can get her referred again to camhs.

Thank you and I wish everyone the best and your dc too.

black definitely push to get her referred again. It seems that it is the people who shout loudest are the ones who get seen quickest, so shout as loud as you can.

I've spoken to the wefare officer who is going to get someone from the pastoral team to talk to ds.

Anymore progress from anyone else?

hello all, I am sorry to hear of your children feeling anxious, down and in need of support, i hope you get some here, and any help you need from Camhs.

i don't think my local Canhs is normally as bad as the experience we had.

I haven't heard a response to my email.

I did though, have a call from the person we had seen who i explained the situation to, that I had written to her boss to change counsellors/advisor whatever.

She'd been calling me for a different reason, and seemed rather taken aback when i explained why I wasn't happy etc... At one point, when i mentioned the assessment happy sad face, she baulked audibly over the phone and got a bit fretty saying 'you didn't mention that in your email did you'

I'd say she panicked, she knew damn well she hadn't behaved as she should.

I felt pretty empowered that I'd managed to get my point over.

School totally behind me, and will help get a response should i not hear from Camhs by the end of the week.

thankyou. she is in a separate bit still, so not joining her peers yet but the school couldn't have done more support wise.
i have spoken to camhs and it looks likely she can see someone else. such a slow soul destroying process though.
x

still waiting to see next adviser, dd has had a relapse. gp has written again to say it's bad but we are only being offered a bog standard initial person to work with.
have spoken to area manager, and even tho she spoke to psychologist we still don't get to see one.

It's June the first on monday, and my dd hasn't attended school properly since the end of January.

camhs is useless. fucking useless. talk to them and they sound like robots reading off a script.