Life lately is at best hard and I am feeling very overwhelmed and more than a bit sorry for myself.
Apologies for the long self pitying post but I don't have anyone in RL to say this to.
I have 2 ADC at home both autistic and ADHD diagnosed many years ago by a specialist NHS service, both have struggled with MH but both are graduates and work part time one in paid work, one for experience and structure. Both in receipt of PIP. Neither would be capable of living independently at this point.
I work full time for little over NMW and have done so since I got divorced almost 20 years ago. DC dad walked away and contributed nothing financially or in any other way. He simply got fed up of the life we had and according to him, "never being put first."
I'm also watching my very elderly dad dying by inches in a care home. He's been on end of life care for 12 months and in receipt of CHC funding but it looks like that will be removed now as he's not died and although incredibly frail with end stage dementia along with other comorbidities he is classed as stable. The Dr prefaces this by saying "but he could die tonight, tbh I can't believe he's still here" I feel so bad because I just want it to be over he has no quality of life and he and my late mum have already spent a substantial part of their savings paying for his care. Now he will go back to paying 5K a month to fund care and I shall have to battle DWP again for AA.
My DC 1 has a PIP review so I shall be having to apply for that again.
Tonight my Ninja foodie died, my DC use it to prepare their own food, this means until it's replaced (it's under warranty) I shall no doubt have to cook for them, because they aren't safe using the oven.
Just for added fun I also have a UTI and like many others am very worried about my finances. We barely get to the end of the month. I have no savings. Sometimes life just seems so hard.
I try and focus on the positives I have secure housing and my mortgage is almost paid off, I love my job and I know I make a difference every day to the people I support. My DC are lovely kind adults and try their best to help me
But Christ on a bike does it have to be so hard?