Hello everyone - quite a vulnerable first post…
I am a hospice nurse, after a tough couple of years I decided to leave my full time position a year and a half ago to just work on the bank at the hospice, it was working really well and I was picking up regular shifts until April this year when my mum was diagnosed with stage four pancreatic cancer. She is currently having palliative chemo and her prognosis isn’t good, therefore I cancelled my shifts for the foreseeable in April due to this as I wasn’t sure how I would cope between the parallel of looking after people dying and also coming to terms with my mums diagnosis and how this would be her.
I found out that I was pregnant in June, after a year of trying and referred myself to the GP to be seen by the fertility clinic although this unexpectedly wasn’t needed. Mum was aware of this and is over the moon that I’m pregnant, but I have this guilt that she may not be here to meet our baby. I’m also in the position of not qualifying for SMP if I don’t work regularly between now and the end of October - I’m not sure how easy maternity allowance is going to be to get either. I’ve picked up a shift in October to see how I go, but I’m really not sure how I feel about it. I’m lucky that my husband has a good job and he will be able and is willing to support us until I figure something out after the baby.
Looking for others who have been in a similar situation, I loved my job and I feel so lost