What can I do to survive my new neighbour 🤔

[justify]

I have recently moved to what I thought would be a lovely rented cottage but my neighbour is making my life hell with ridiculous complaints. She says she can hear me on the toilet and starts banging on the walls if I even have the radio on barely audible on radio 4 for10 mins to hear the news
Fortunately all the other neighbours are lovely and say she a driven out all the previous tenants. She contacted my new landlady to complaint that she didn't want me to put a small shed even though I put it where she agreed . I have been a tenant for 46 years and have never had any complaints and have always been considered kind,helpful and quiet. I can't afford to move again and have many disabilities so this move has taken a lot out of me.
Luckily my landlady is aware that she has driven away previous tenants but it's still causing me a great deal of anxiety..I feel like I'm walking on eggshells and she is very unstable.

Thanks,I didn't realise this. My landlady said they were going to send her a warning that they would take legal action if she persisted in tenant harassment. I don't think they have though but they told me to contact them if she continues with this behaviour.

You're one of the lucky ones then if you're asking that. Lots of housing in the UK with paper-thin walls. Used to hear my neighbour on the toilet and putting his cup down on his coffee table. Nightmare.

How are you doing @justify?

Hi,thanks for asking. I'm surviving by trying to totally avoid them Occasionally they have hammered on the wall when I've just walked into my bathroom. They also sent me a really horrible poison pen letter stating that nobody cares about me or would bother even looking in on me because no one is interested. At first I thought oh good I'm glad no-one is interested in me because I don't want to be gossiped about. When I reread the letter I realised that writing certain words in upper case with exclamation marks were intended to upset me.
My landlady says she keeps sending her horrible emails about me and said that she will have a fence put up between the gardens(unfortunately I think she's decided it would be too expensive). The gardens feel almost shared with no privacy. To stop my dog ever barking at her I bought a special collar which seems to work. My dog doesn't bark at people who are friendly but they just behave so oddly she barks at them.. My landlady might reclaim the end of my garden which they claimed in between tenants.. They stand staring into my house day and night. I don't make any noise and have bought headphones but they always have something to complain about. I have only left the dog in the house once to go to medical appointment but now I probably could go out if she has the collar on. I'm planning on ot being pressured to leave. I don't hear anything through the walls from their house so I think they just make it up .It's a 200 hundred year old house so not a new build.

If she bangs on the wall, bang back.
If she says she hears you on the loo, say you can hear her.

Match her energy. Then when you've had enough tell her to fuck off.

Stop being nice. She's had her way long enough.

With the staring, I’d be tempted to become a naturist for a while. There is no law to prevent you being naked in your own home and garden. Maybe they’d feel uncomfortable to be staring at you if you were in the buff.

Your LL really needs to reclaim the bit of land they have illegally occupied though!

Your landlady needs to step up here, she rented to you knowing this nutcase drove away previous tenants with her behaviour. She will have to put in those fences, get you a camera doorbell and get you privacy film for your windows.

You need to completely ignore this neighbour and act as if she doesn't exist. She wants a reaction, she wants to see you're upset. Don't bang back, don't shout back, don't engage at all. Go about your day, play your radio, put on your tv. If she speaks to you outside, ignore her. Wear giant headphones and sunglasses, give the impression you can't see or hear her.

Does your landlady respond to these emails, if so what does she say?

Please go to the police. I had almost the exact same situation and eventually broke down and rang the police, i was in hysterics on the phone. They were fantastic. They send officers round the next day who had a word with her and she never bothered me again.
Explain you are a woman alone, vulnerable and disabled, as I did.
Unfortunately people like this can sniff people like us out to target.
Good luck

Malicious communications law? Stalking law? Could well be breaking both ?

How did the landlady end up giving them the end of the garden? That's so odd.

Is that piece of land still registered as belonging to your cottage? If so claim it back, it legally belongs to your house.

Your landlord is awful as he’s rented the house knowing full well about the neighbours so do contact police. nip it in the bus now.

The landlady didn't give them the land and is now getting legal advice on reclaiming it. I sent her my other neighbours land registry plans showing clearly that our gardens ended at the same place. She is waiting for her own land registry details before reclaiming. They have written to them accusing them of stealing the land and they replied with a plan that had been coloured in with red pencil to 'prove' it's theirs. I wouldn't have minded so much if they hadn't built a hide there facing my house and stare at my house and garden. I am keeping a record of any threatening letters and dates of hammering on the wall. My other next door neighbour has said in the past they have told her that they use a bowling ball to bash on the walls..that's why it sounds like they are trying to demolish it. I have felt like a prisoner in my own home especially as I couldn't leave the house without the dog. As previously stated they have driven out all previous tenants, some of them couples with children and/ or people with disabilities. I don't have enough evidence to go to the police and I did warn them that I am keeping a record.

Warning them is like waving a red rag to a Bull. They won't care, they've been doing this a long time and getting away with it. Don't engage with them at all. They'll use any engagement as an excuse to keep going. A camera doorbell will give you evidence for anything they come to your door for or will at least keep them from coming to your door.

Does your landlady respond to the emails? If so what does she say? She should really be going to Police about them herself, especially as she knows they've driven former tenants out.

Am I missing something? Why can't your landlady just go and refence the end of the garden?

If they bang on your wall, put your radio on. If they continue to bang, turn it up louder to drown out the noise. Don't be quieter to appease them, it never works.

Kill them with kindness. Grey rock. Every time you see them or they moan, smile and say “oh I’m so sorry, these thin walls are a nightmare aren’t they. Please do let the LL know if it’s a problem. Must dash, got stuff to do” and walk off with a smile and wave.

On repeat. It can only get to you if you let it.

I'm concerned that you have bought your dog a special type of collar to appease them - would this be an anti bark training or shock collar by any chance?

I thought someone might ask about the dog collar no,I would never use an electric shock collar I think they are banned because they are so barbaric .The collar senses the vibration when she barks and releases a lemon scent and a whoosh sound. I rarely use it because she stops barking instantly when I say "quiet ". She took a long time getting used to the sounds of cars on the gravel driveway of the small shared driveway. They have erected a small slatted fence and a wooden hide(I thought it was a log store), which I didn't realise had benches in it when I viewed the property because you have to really bend over to see. It certainly never occurred to me anyone would sit,stand and watch me and my house.
I think the landlady who lives a long way away didn't visit at all.
One time when the neighbour was hanging over my gate ranting at me and making my dog bark I did eventually tell her to fuck off. My landlady doesn't respond to these long ranting emails just replies with a thanks.
Like me I don't think they like confrontation but are now worried about losing another tenant so are determined to reclaim their land. I really want a fence down the side but I've let the shrubs grow tall and would have a lot more privacy if my garden extended to the original fence. It's good to hear the police were sympathetic but I still don't think I have enough evidence. As for being friendly I did try when I first moved in but I know she will start ranting ,complaining and moaning at me if I try to communicate at all. I will just keep completely blanking her as she immediately comes out into the garden if I dare try to do any gardening.

My landlady doesn't respond to these long ranting emails just replies with a thanks.

They will see this as thanking them for complaining about you. That won't help. She needs to stop responding at all. You have to completely ignore your neighbours, no telling them to fuck off, or letting them know you're keeping a record. They have to see that this time they're not getting attention, a reaction or a response.

Have you asked your landlady why she didn't tell you that these neighbours had driven previous tenants out with bad behaviour?

It was a while ago.I told her to just fuck off. I don't even look in their direction or respond in any way. My landlady thought it was funny to just say thanks after reading pages and pages of rants. I said why don't you have them sent to spam but she thought just responding with thanks was dismissive enough. Also the septic tank is in my neighbours garden and is shared between 3 houses and the the landlady shares emptying costs. My landlady is really apologetic about my experience living next door but said she thought maybe she had mellowed as she'd had cancer(now in remission). The previous tenants didn't stay long and didn't say anything about their behaviour.

I think you might well have plenty of evidence for stalking and harassment crime. Get a ring doorbell front and back.

It’s about a ‘pattern of behaviour’ - only two incidents after being asked to stop meets the threshold.

Your LL is totally disingenuous - she doesn’t want to engage as it will come up as a neighbour dispute if she wants to sell. She has thrown you under the bus. There is no need to live like this.

https://www.suzylamplugh.org/stalking-and-criminal-law

I can't really have a ring door bell because we share steps up to the house so I would be filming them. At the back it could be a problem because it would film the end of my garden which they believe is there's. Now since my landlady has gone back on putting up fencing I agree that I have been thrown under the bus.