Breastfeeding till the age of 4 - what do you think?

[lisalisa]

Message withdrawn

Then where do you get the information about breastmilk not being any use after a year?

As I said I'm more than happy to answer the questions you asked me. But you might have to post them again!

nursey jo i'm sorry you felt you got a bashing, i've felt i've had a bashing too when i've said things forcefully. Such is the spirit of passionate debate is suppose. But tiktok is a breastfeeding counsellor who is burningly up to date on these issues, and if you look at what she said, i think it might help. I think she does have the facts, as much as they are. It may not be your fault, it may be the fault of the health authorities you work for, but it is not true that breast milk loses its nutritional or antibody properties at 12 months, thats all. Yes, i think maybe the antibody count may go down [i'm not quite sure] but it still can have protective effects. Because mums often feel let down by the system, lots of us had bad experiences in hospital where there was no support for breast feeding, we can have very strong opinions about it.

A maternity nurse is someone who takes care of a new mum and new baby, right? I find it difficult to picture how someone can help much with this picture (babies don't need anything other than their mother, IMV) - which means, to me that your typical "maternity nurse" is a glorified cleaner/housekeeper, who would do everything that the new birth prevents the mum from doing.

Fine. I could have felt the same way after a couple of posters making assumptions and posting about me here. If you let one heated thread get to you then mumsnet probably isnt the place for you!

Don't nannies, maternity nurses, etc. have a vested interest in getting the baby onto the bottle ASAP?

I still disagree completely with your comments about clinginess.

I honestly dont see why you would leave mumsnet though.

Go on stay

shoot me down if you want and I don't have all the facts just knowledge gained from being a mum but I don't understand why mothers still breastfeed after roughly 12-18 months. When I do see them I do feel uncomfortable.....not the breastfeeding part but that the child is older and not solely dependant on milk.
Surely a child has most of its needs met through food and other liquids. Is it the closeness they experience when breastfeeding that keeps them going?

My babies haven't wanted to stop breastfeeding at the 12-18 month point. Weaning them at this stage would be unnatural, so what would be the point in that?

There are a lot of choices we make in life, but not all choices are equal - some are better than others.

None of my kids is clingy - all extended BF.

There are lots of factors that make a kid clingy - why pick on breastfeeding?

A2005 what age would you wean them? what age do you definately want to stop breastfeeding at?

I don't have a point of view on that. In my experience, I would be extremely surprised to go beyond the 4th birthday.

My DD is 3y3mo and she BF about twice a day. If she asks for a feed and it is inconvenient, she is happy to be fobbed off. Her want/need for BF is definitely diminishing, so I would not expect it to go on for much longer.

Like you AS2005 I've never felt the need to 'wean' any of my four kids. They've all stopped, gradually, of their own accord sometime between 2.5 and 3.5.

Until recently I didn't even know there was a term 'extended breastfeeding' and actually I take issue the label.
After all, I've never heard the term 'curtailed breastfeeding' used to describe someone who weans before 4 months.

NurseyJo, it's a shame you were upset but you were very dogmatic, and your assertions went far beyond 'what you have been told', into angry-sounding defensiveness that as a professional you knew for sure that what you were saying was correct.

I quote:

"You can think what you like, but i am a professional and do know what I am talking about.

The antibodies in breastmilk reduce over time and are not as beneficial beyond 12 months. THAt is fact.

Formula is not as effective for babies over 12 months of age, the same is true of breastmilk and has been proven as much. They then need cowsmilk and a balanced solid diet."

I replied reasonably carefully and politely, and explained why this was wrong.
You then came back and explained your experience (in CAPs , too, which is shouting!) and added,

"I am therefore fortunate enough to receive up-to-date advice and information as and when the DH release it."

AND

"the department of health have actually stated categorically that breastfeeding is of 'little nutritional benefit' of babies beyond 12 months of age."

I for one challenged both those statements, probably slightly less politely, but I was not personally unpleasant to you.

You still haven't said 'Whoops, I got it wrong'. Instead, you have made concerted attempts to garner sympathy because of feeling hurt at the responses you got.

As I said way down list, if you state erroneous and misleading info as 'fact', if you then go on to defend these 'facts' by making even more preposterous statements, and say because you are a professional you know what you are talking about, and continue to get it wrong, but dogmatically, then people are going to get annoyed with you.

You may be a great maternity nurse and a super support to the mums you help, but you have a professional duty to ensure what you say to them about feeding and weaning is correct. Otherwise your clients will hear the correct stuff elsewhere and wonder if you know what you are talking about. Conflicting advice is a source of confusion to many new mothers, and in fact, you should be grateful to mumsnet for trying to put you right!

Crikey,this is completely surreal now isn't it???

The 'Western' preoccupation with dairy products intrigues me. Many cultures barely touch it,when in infancy or otherwise. When my sister was in China,she was told by Chinese friends that Caucasians 'reek' of milk!

Fwiw,my children have never drunk cows' milk at any stage.

Must also mention that I have been quoting Spidermama's brilliant 'curtailed breastfeeding' comment extensively.

As always,am genuflecting slightly whilst reading another dazzlingly brilliant tiktok post.....

moondog, you get no brownie points for a* licking

Bugger!

I want to be teacher's pet.

My kids only have milk on their cereal - have never asked for it as a drink. They were very weird when we were living in the USA, where dairy is a food group.

We have cheese and yoghurt occasionally - eg once a week.

Everyone is healthy and normal sized.

My kids never drink milk either and tbh I didn't know that was unusual.

I use it in cooking occasionally, and for my weakness, my addiction, my achilles heel .... cappuchino.

My mum was told by her health professionals in the 60's that you have to drink milk to make milk. Yeah, right! Is it any wonder people lose faith in the profession with info like that?

Sorry NurseyJo I thought you deserved the response you got. As Tiktok says, your postings were very aggressive and what made me see red was the "I'm a professional, so I know".

It's my experience that only three health professionals I've ever met have ever known anything useful about breastfeeding. Out of the some 30 professionals I've dealt with in the course of having 2 children, a 10% rate of useful professional knowledge about the most basic thing mothers can do - feed their kids - is really rather piss-poor, imo. So you'll understand why, when someone tells me they're a health professional so they know about bf, I feel it's a bit like Paris Hilton telling me she knows about poverty.

ameriscot sry just off the subject a wee minute... I thought u didn't have any kids?

just to say glad tiktok is about to get things straight.