Paranoid about my ability to BF

[MuffinTopMamma]

My DD is 2 weeks old and due for her next weigh-in on Monday. At 10 days she had dropped from 8lb10oz to 8lb 4oz. The HV made a 'throwaway' comment about her surprise that she hadn't regained her birth weight at that point and it's really knocked my confidence.

Now I'm convinced that my baby isn't feeding properly and I'm feeling low about it. Midwife says she's latching properly but she doesn't feed for long at each feed and I feel like I'm feeding constantly.

I've gone from being in a beautiful blissful state to paranoid. Can anyone reassure me so I don't fret all the way to Monday?

Shame about the comment, muffin

Other ways to be reassured are to check your baby is feeding often day and night (no long, long sleeps), that she is having 2-3 large soft yellow poos each day and has wee'd at every nappy change.

Length of time on the breast is not really relevant.

It helps to offer the other side each time, too.

Is she contented at least some of the time and keen to feed?

If she's latching on properly I can't see why she shouldn't be feeding adequately. I was a muddler-through with bfing and there'll be someone along who can answer much more intelligently, but I do remember the anxiety over weight gain and doing it properly and I know how wound up you feel.

She'll be fine, she'll start to gain weight, things will settle down. I always worried about my DD2 as she gained weight very slowly, but she turned out to be a small-but-perfectly-formed person, and is happy, healthy and probably stuffing her face with fish at school even as I type.

I should point out that tiktok answered intelligently while I was typing...

She's doing on average one very large mustard coloured poo each day. HV was happy with this, despite it not being the norm. Nappies are wet on each change. She sleeps a lot, but is alert in between. She's keen to feed (a lot), but appears to fall asleep quickly after initial let-down, so feels like she's snacking rather than feeding.

muffin, thanks for the extra info.

I'm not sure what you mean by 'I feel like I'm feeding constantly' and 'she sleeps a lot ' - can't both be true

Is she feeding often? This is crucial, and more important than the length of time she is on.

If she needs more milk, then there may well be ways to ensure this happens - feeding more 'sides' each time, keeping her skin to skin so she asks for more feeds, feeding more at night.

About weight gain - my ds took 4 weeks to regain his birth weight and my HV said this wasn't uncommon. He was feeding frequently though with plenty wet and dirty nappies and was alert when awake.

Sorry for being unclear. She feeds on & off during the day, each feed about 10-15 minutes, after which I try to rouse her by changing nappy or winding, and then offer other breast. This lasts for a few hours in the morning (6-9), around lunch (11-1) and mid afternoon (3-4), and is interspersed with naps about 1-2 hours long. In the evening she feeds from about 5-8 and again 10-12 in a similar on/off pattern. She then sleeps for 2 x 3/3.5 hr blocks with half hour feed in between overnight.

I think my main worries are that she's not feeding effectively and/or that I am not producing enough milk. I am scared about Monday's weigh in, and what that will do to my already low confidence levels.

I get you, muffin...sounds like a normal and expected pattern for a baby of this age, and things should be fine on the scales

Thanks for reassurance. I'll be sure to check back if the scales aren't friendly come Monday.

My DD took 4 weeks to regain birthweight

I just thought I would try and put your mind at rest re length of feeds.

I was really worried as my DD had suddenly gone from fairly lengthy feeds (half hour) to spending only about 10 minutes per feed. All it meant was that she had become much more efficient at emptying the boob as she was gaining weight well.

This happened a little while later than the age of your lo (4 weeks, I think), but I think it is the quality rather than the quantity of the feed and it sounds like you're doing absolutely fine.

I hope all is well on Monday - try not to worry and enjoy your weekend x

Thanks all. Fingers crossed for Monday! My sleep deprived and hormonal brain is very vulnerable.

My DS took 5 weeks to regain his birthweight.

It's such a shame that HCPs don't think a bit more about the throw away comments they make. At 10 days, and if she was happy with his nappies and how he was in general, then I can see no reason to say anything that might undermine the confidence of a new mother.

MuffinTop - I spent the first 6 weeks or so worrying about how long DS was feeding for. It made me terribly anxious. Unfortunately I was advised by my midwife to keep putting DS back to the same breast for up to an hour rather than swapping sides, which I suspect inhibited his weight gain.
Just keep offering the breast and all will be well

Hi. A quick update - my DD has gained 4oz since last week's weigh in, and is now just under the 50th centile at 8lb 8oz. I feel so relieved to know that's she has put weight on! Thanks again for the support - I'm really starting to enjoy BF and long may it continue!