Am i going mad?

[nosleeptilbedtime]

I don't understand what is happening with my DS who is 10 weeks old. He wont feed, and is crying every time I put him to the breast. I have ,managed to feed him a little bit since last night but he will only stay on for a couple of minutes.
I rang NHS direct last night as I was worried there was something wrong with him, much to my DP's disgust as he is sure he is absolutely fine. NHS direct nurse suggested that I was 'tired' and that since he didn't have a fever or wasn't vomiting and he had fed a little bit then he was ok.
I have to go to work today so can't take him over to the doctors (am self employed so can't take time off) unless it is a real emergency. He is sitting in his bouncy chair cooing away at the moment.
Just worried that he has only had 2 short feeds since last night. not normal. Can anyone shed some light?
Sorry post is long and rambling, have had no sleep.

I wouldn't worry too much. If he is happy and not crying then he's most likely fine.

My dd went through a stage at about that age of going 12 hours without a feed - she would just sleep from 7-7.

I'd just keep an eye on him, and keep offering feeds so he doesn't get dehydrated.

When my son was a similar age he went right off food- cried every time he was put to the boob or had a bottle. It got worse and worse over the course of a week or so. Everyone kept telling me not to worry, that he might be teething, that I was being over-anxious, etc.

It turned out that he had very had tonsillitis and by the time we got him some treatment was very sick.

Watch him carefully and don;t take any flannel off anyone else is my advice. You know when something is wrong with your own baby.

nosleep, you're perfectly justified in being concerned. Babies do sometimes do this, and it should always be watched....most times they are absolutely fine, they go back to normal feeding and no one is any the wiser about what happened, but just occasionally it can be a sign of infection (like ears, making it painful to feed). They fight the infection and all is well. Usually. This might have already happened as he is cooing now, you say

Not sure why the NHS Direct nurse thought you being tired had anything to do with it.

Hang on in there. Hold him close to you without insisting or pushing him to feed.

Hope all is well, and of course you should see a doc or HV if you are worried.

thanks folks, he seems fine until I try to feed him when he gets cross and closes his mouth tightly. Just tried to give him a bottle of ebm but he wouldn't have any of it.
Worried about leaving him with my Mum but it's only for a few hours.
I think I will get him to docs or HV if he is still not feeding by the time I get back.
Thanks again, will keep you postred

Well he had his bottle of ebm while I was out and since I have been home he has refused the breast unless I hold him in an upright position with his tummy on my tummy, holding him up under the arms... not a great position for me but at least he is feeding a bit.
he just kicks off as soon as I try to have him in the cradle hold. I don't know if i am doing something wrong.

I'd guess that there might be something causing him discomfort, then. Maybe an ear infection? The angle at which you're sitting/lying can make a difference to how uncomfortable that is.

Yes you'd think that but he has no signs of being ill, no fever or anything, in fact he's smiling away at DD as I type. Just gets grumpy when I feed him. Confused.

nosleep, it's worth thinking about what might be going on in your little one's head, now that illness seems to be ruling itself out.

Have you just gone back to work? Is he getting used to being without you, at a time when he has come to understand how much he adores you? Is he somehow expressing confusion and stress in his own way? I dont think any of this is permanently harmful or anything - hanging on in there with him, as you are doing, while he goes through this whatever it is, is absolutely the right way to help him cope and restore his world back to him.

Does any of this ring a bell with you?

It's the weekend coming up, so you'll be able to have a lot of unpressurised cuddles with him and chilling and loving

Thanks tiktok, I think you could be right. crazy as it seems to go to work when he's only 10 weeks, the 6 hours a week I put in now means I can continue to be my own boss and pick and choose my hours to fit in with kids long in to the future. He's just fallen asleep on boob now and all is peaceful

nosleep, that's good news

I suspect he prob is expressing his feelings about the change in his life - but he will become reassured and able to cope if you cut him some slack when he is with you

Quick update;
I ended up phoning the breastfeeding helpline last night as he was again getting so cross when I was trying to feed him and I was getting to my wits end. they suggested getting him checked out to rule out an ear infection although she suspected it was a kind of 'nursing strike'
so I got the doc out this morning and she checked him over and he is absolutely fine.
So I guess it's a strike
We managed to get him to feed this morning with DP holding him outstretched (his favourite position) and me sort of dangling the breast into his mouth from a squatting position
I know he is hungry as he is sucking his hand but as soon as I try to snuggle down and feed him he gets really cross. I hope he will get back to normal soon.

nosleep - it's good he is healthy and it made sense to check his ears.

He is not so much cross from the sound of it but feeling 'different' - babies don't figure things out well, of course, but they can feel anger, frustration, confusion and loneliness.

He could be in the huff with you - if that's not putting too much interpretation on it. He will get back to feeling how he did - you'll hang on in there and show him you're ready and waiting for him whenever he wants you

Update;
DS fed really well all day yesterday and today, he seems to be making up for lost time!He even was happy in the cradle hold. Panic over! Thanks for all the support!