Daisy Goodwin - how much do you reckon she got paid to write this nasty drivel?

[fabsmum]

NCTgetsitintheneckagain

What a horrible, article to write in National Breastfeeding Awareness week.

And using the case of that suicidal woman in the US to have a pop at breastfeeding advocates in the UK.

Tiktok - There was no need to report it, others did.

I was trying to get across a point. On here if you say something like 'some people have bad experiences with bf counsellors' other MN'ers will want that statement backed up. I backed up my point.

I think it is important to understand that when someone writes an article like Daisy Goodwin's something has gone wrong somewhere along the way. I think that opinions of other mothers is a big influence on new mums as are support groups. I think it is important to recognise that support to bf mothers is vital but that it must be supportive support IYSWIM. As with everything in life, one bad apple can spoil the rest and I wondered if an experience like mine might be behind the article.

I don't for a minute think that my experience is representive of the NCT as a whole, but I won't be the only new mum in the UK with an experience like this. As I said, I think it is relevant to why an article like that (which I agree is very one sided and gives a v negative view) might be written.

I think its better to think why an article like that is published than simply saying 'shes evil'. Unless we address the issues nothing will get better.

I agree with ruty, and found that even in a hospital which claims a lot of pro-breastfeeding policies, there are still a lot of practitioners who are quick to assume the problem must be one of supply and then to press a solution which is likely to end breastfeeding.

A very damaging article indeed.

When I was pregnant with DS I attended the NCT antenatal class in my area. We were definitely given the breast is best message, as I expected, and I fully intended to BF my DS. After much heart ache, which I'm not going to go into as it's irrelevant, we ended up FFing him. I was guilt ridden. Not the fault of the NCT. My guilt.

We went to our NCT class reunion some weeks later and I was really nervous about having to feed DS infront of everyone. My hang ups again. I did feel that a couple of the mums were staring at me, and one of the Dads made a comment that my DS was crying because he could smell the milk on me when I was feeding him. His wife, who I later became good friends with said she cringed when he made that comment. I digress. To my shock, my DH, DS & I were asked to come along to talk to the new antenatal class. I felt I had to apologetically point out to the teacher that I was FFing and not BFing. She laughed and assured me that it didn't matter. Not once was I labelled 'selfish and irresponsible' as Daisy Goodwin suggests.

The point I'm trying (in my own tired way) is that my 'failure' to breastfeed DS was not down to the NCT, or other mums whether BFing or FFing. My choice to FF was entirely mine. I'm due to have DC2 any day now and will not be put off by my previous experience of BFing. I will try again, wholeheartedly.

This article could potentially stop many women at the first hurdle and use of words like 'gestapo' is entirely uncalled for and creates a needless culture of, for want of a better word, hatred towards proud BFing mummies.

There are judgemental people in every walk of life. That's just what they are, judgemental. Doesn't make a jot of difference how they feed their child, that's just the way they are.

I don't feel I've conveyed myself very well. Lack of sleep and being about to pop taking their toll on my brain cells. .

photo of daisy looking very much like her target audience - the over 50 MIL.

sorry it is early and i'm insomniac. i don't really mean to be catty. i justwanted to see what she looked like IRL as opposed to airbrushed publicity pictures.

wonder if she still stands behind claire verity since she has now skulked back under the rock from whence she came.

excellent post insomniac. my experience exactly.

I can't stand this bitch journalist. She also writes patronising crap about single mums. Had to write and complain about her to the Times once. She is very bitter and ignorant imo.

i do agree with her that breasfeeding is very difficult at first and also drove me to despair for the first two months. i persevered and don't want to stop now but guilt is a huge thing in the bf/ff debate.

it's not always about wishing to breastfeed- some people really can't. i don't like the tone of the article though. in usual daisy style it's bitter. just another example of mums giving each other a hard time about parenting.

"it's not always about wishing to breastfeed- some people really can't"

But only a very small number wouldn't physically be able to breastfeed, if all of us had access to proper, skilled support - that basic fact is completely lost to DG, and that makes me cross.

She really doesn't understand the first thing about what 'lactivism' is all about. To me lactivism is about empowering mums to feed their babies with their own milk, and stopping the dissemination of misinformation about breast and formula feeding. It's not about bullying or guilt-tripping women who don't want to breastfeed, or who can't breastfeed. It's about righting a very big wrong, which is that for the past 60 or 70 years women have been deliberately obstructed from bf their babies by the actions of ignorant people.

She seems to think there's something 'natural' about huge numbers of women not being able to breastfeed. You want to shake her and shout: "It doesn't have to be like this you silly mare". But as long as people like her are vilifying and ridiculing the people in the front line of breastfeeding support and promotion, then feeding will carry on being crap for women and for babies.

I totally agree with the lack of support gabygirl. It really is pants and if there was more support lots of mums would succesfully bf. Society really does need to change regarding this issue and Ms Goodwin's article dosn't help matters.
There are many things that I wish that I, and other mums were told about bf before I had dd;
That I would be feeding round the clock, not at the pescribed 3/4 hours.
That my milk would soak all my clothes and bedding thus making me feel disgusting.
That there would be a two week growth spurt resulting in even more constant feeding and exhaustion.
That it wasn't bonding for me at first as I wasn't used to having a person attached to my nipple all day and I really missed my personal space.
That mastitus is horrendous and gave me depression.
that if you persevere then breastfeeding is wonderful, simple and bonding.
I love it now but it did take a while. I don't want to give up and if more woen recieved support, they too would still be bf.

I also believe that many women are embarassed about feeding in public because of the attitude of the public. I endured a bit of sneering and leering when feeding dd in public. This needs to change. Mabe modern Britain needs to change it's attitudes towards mums in general.

I hate Daisy's article and I hate what she writes about the continuum concept by Liedhoff because I like that book.
I also think taht extended breasfeeding should become more acceptable.

women

Ok so I guess if I had proper support then I would have continued breastfeeding. It was a decision I made then and I have to deal with it. When I felt much better (maybe around 6 weeks) I was asking people about going back to breast feeding. I had this really strong urge to feed him myself but I was told (by my health visitor) that it wouldn't work and it would be tto much hard work for me. She said why would I want to take steps back when I had established a routine with him and DS1.

There should be more help I agree but I also agree that women sometimes make a decision to breastfeed it doesn't work and they are quite happy to FF.
I also think your right with what my midwife said. I think I was just too much work for them and they really didn't have the time to support me.

Still I wish I had breastfed though x

I need to make an apology...I think I'm behind NiceShoes thinking MNers blamed ffing for psoriasis....

I was labouring under the assumption that psoriasis was an atopic disease (e.g. excema and asthma) not an autoimmune disease which it is. We all know what they say about assuming....

In the how were you fed thread I stated some of the things wrong with me that could legitimately laid at solids at 8 weeks/only bottles of ribena/apple juice doors and I included the 3 kinds of psoriasis I have in that list.

I don't blame ffing for any of my illnesses because I wasn't formula fed (barring the 4 or so ozs twice a day on my baby rice) I was bottle fed Ribena.

I don't see anything wrong with the article myself. Sorry.

Right well I've caught up and think everything's been said. PMSL at moondog's "Let's give it [breastfeeding] the profile and attention that is presently accorded to state of the art travel systems, nappy bins and silly matching outfits." - so true!

tiktok, do you have any idea if the NCT plans to sue for the indoctrination type comments?

Can't imagine NCT would think it worthwhile to sue, SPP.

No idea if they're even gonna write a letter.

Just seems like they should make some sort of public show of forcing her to eat her words. OTOH I read back through it and I think it would be difficult to find any one big thing she said - it was more in the insinuations.
SM I was wondering what on earth you were talking about! As you can see, I am back to being a bear, much more comfortable!

Are you allowed to eat words when you're breastfeeding? Quick, someone check in The CLBB!

nah, SPP.....not a balanced enough diet

much better to stick to cake and chocolate

Why, as a society do we have to swing from one extreme to the other. My mother (in the 70s) was actively encouraged to FF as bottles were brought round the ward ready made up and handed out without asking mothers how they were feeding. She was very young but still remembers that bfing was very unusual on the ward (she said there was one woman who insisted on bf and the midwives were a bit shory with her). We have now swung the other way (some would say quite rightly) and now castigate ff with a vengeance. FF is seen as being a neglectful parent, just a bf was seen as being awkward when my mum was on the ward. DM's article is wrong to blame NCT or any organisation but one comment to a vulnerable, sleep-deprived, sensitive mother can so easily be taken the wrong way. Feeding is the most obvious indicator of a mother's nurturing instinct and its really hard to say the right thing to a mother who is struggling (whether FF or BF). Its typical DM stuff and does not present themselves, bf or post natal care in a true light but we have to see that some mothers are driven to feel so guilty by a poorly presented message about the benefits of bf. I know there is evidence against ff (although my brother and i were ff and we're fine thanks!!) but surely its time to stop this one is good, other is bad. I was given a bib for DS1 when i passed the bf milestone of 12 weeks. It said 'bottles are for dummies' on it. I was absolutely shocked and horrified and ds1 never wore it as most of my friends were ff (they had all wanted to bf but had given up for one reason or another). Why do we have to make other feel bad for making a choice??

"We have now swung the other way (some would say quite rightly) and now castigate ff with a vengeance. FF is seen as being a neglectful parent"

Look - breastfeeding isn't a social 'trend' - it's the biologically normal way to feed a baby and how almost all babies have been fed since the dawn of time (except for the past few decades).

Don't fall into Daisy Goodwin's trap! Lactivists don't abuse women who don't breastfeed - there is no 'castigation' or any accusations of neglect.