bf 15 mths on. its constant. i'm so fed up with it. i resent it but ds dairy intolerant. help please

[kalo12]

my ds is dairy intolerant and hardly eats and is on lowest centile for weight. i was prepared to bf for the long haul but i'm so fed up with it.

he bfs constantly, i try don't offer don't refuse but he demands it all the time. screams if i don't give in. its literally 10 - 15 times a day, plus every hour - hour and a half at night. from about 3 am its every twenty minutes.

been trying ncss for months, the ppo is impossible, he screams. i have to prize my nipple out of his mouth as he is clamped on with all his teeth.

am starting to feel so angry, i would be happy with a couple of times a day and even night, but can't seem to reduce it.

so thinking only option is cold turkey, but as he is df don't want to withhold important nutrients and also don't want him to be emotionally fraught but just at my wits end now.

dh works every eve and weekends so on my own all the time.

advice please

kalo, I think you need to cut back a bit on feeds through the day so he starts to eat more. I eventually tried this with my ds3 13mths (also had dairy issues) and after a few days it worked and he now loves his food and I get a bit of a break. He fell in love with blueberries first then progressed onwards.

I know how you feel though as we are still going through constant night feeds (I have 4 other dcs and worry about them being disturbed by him) several times a night. I'm a terrible sleeper as it is so am living on sugar through the day to keep me awake. It's something I have to tackle sooner rather than later, prob over the next school holiday when it won't matter if we don't get much sleep.

With the food it took a week or so, but he now knows to eat first and drink milk after/later.

Congratulations mrsjammi

And thank you for proving my point that cutting night feeds does indeed lead to better sleep patterns.

Miaow - Who told you your DS isn't hungry in the night? In his current feeding pattern, given his habit of feeding in the night, he will of course wake up hungry at the time when he is used to feeding.

Have you ever been to a Muslim country during the month of Ramadan? In preparation for the next day's fasting from sunrise to sunset, observing Muslims wake up at 2 AM or so, have a full meal, then go back to bed. After a full month of this, they STILL wake up at the same time with grumbling tummies - their eating patterns have changed to include a 2 AM meal.

The only way to solve this is to stop eating at 2 AM. When you wake up hungry in the night, you don't get up, just go back to sleep. Two nights of this and your body re-adjusts to eating in the day and sleeping in the night.

Same with children. Yours wakes up hungry in the night only because he is used to feeding in the night, not because he is a new species of human who just has to eat in the middle of the night. If you stopped night feeds and braved a few hard nights of tears, his body will adjust to eating in the day and sleeping in the night like the rest of us.

Babieseverwhere - re "The sleepy hormone is cholecystokinin, you can read about it here. I don't know much about it myself but it sounds like all nursing mothers make it."

You link to the words of some "breastfeeding consultant" on Blisstree.com and call that "research"?

A more reputable source would have shown you that your Cholecystokinin actually causes nausea, anxiety, and appetite suppression and isn't even present in breast milk in any significant quantity.

Here, this is what real research looks like:

Ghrelin and cholecystokinin in term and preterm human breast milk

ABSTRACT
Aim: To determine whether ghrelin and cholecystokinin (CCK) are present in significant quantities in term and preterm human breast milk, and to identify their source.
Results: While CCK was detected in some samples, levels were insignificant. Infant gestational age, birthweight, maternal age, and maternal pre-pregnancy body mass index did not significantly affect the results.
Conclusion: Ghrelin, but not CCK, is present in breast milk. Since the mammary gland produces ghrelin message, and ghrelin levels in breast milk are higher than those found in plasma, we conclude that ghrelin is produced and secreted by the breast.

Received 22 December 2005; revised 22 February 2006; accepted 3 March 2006

mrsjammi,
Fantastic to hear, that everything is going well with night weaning Enjoy the extra sleep.

CoteDAzur,

Wonderful as mrsjammi success with night weaning is, it does not prove any of your points. All it 'proves' is that mrsjammi has done a wonderful job in night weaning her child at a point where it was the right time from her and her son. This does not follow that it is the right time for the OP to night wean.

I never said that CKK is in breastmilk, you have misunderstood what I wrote/meant.

Lets me try again, by copying and pasting words from the experts.
"Cholecystokinin is released in infants as they suckle but it is also released in the intestine of mothers during breastfeeding [14]. Cholecystokinin is thought to promote maternal behaviour [39] and, as with infants, it relaxes and provides analgesia to mothers [40]. Oxytocin, prolactin and cholecystokinin act synergistically in mothers [33,40]."
From Here