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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

I know breast feeding is the best -blar de blar - but I HATE it.

103 replies

edgarcat · 20/04/2003 10:48

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Hughsie · 22/04/2003 09:44

i think it is definitely worth it - dh gave ds2 a bottle at 11 last night which meant that I had clocked off and gone to bed - far more manageable and he feels he is doing his bit too! I have a friend whose baby refused the bottle so I was keen to be sure ds2 wasn't going to do that - your supply should be established now although my mw had urged me to wait for 6 weeks until introducing the bottle but really i think it is whatever works or you.

I do love the control that is there with a bottle - you know exactly what they have had at what time - none of this falling asleep on the boob!

Clarinet60 · 22/04/2003 16:03

edgarcat - I know how you feel, as it was agony for me with DS2, for about 10 weeks. Inexplicably, one day the pain just vanished. I put it down to a miracle, because I had been asking for one. I love feeding now, and do look like the woman on the box, BUT, if I wanted another baby, which I don't, I couldn't go through those weeks again and would have to bottle feed. Nobody got to the bottom of the pain, even though my HV lent me a LLL book, so I've no advice apart from begging for your own miracle.

grommit · 22/04/2003 16:09

I know breast is best and all that but I spent an agonising few weeks trying to feed dd1, even got the bf support group to the house to help (very strange woman who kept forcing dd1 onto breast until she was hysterical). No luck. I then decided to give up and go with bottle which was great as dh could help and I always got some sleep. No way will I try to bf no2!

Meid · 22/04/2003 16:28

I too found breastfeeding very hard. It was painful to start with and I even had to feed through mastitis. Each feed seemed to last forever. I felt there was constant pressure on me to ensure my DD was full and happy. I also dreaded "public" feeds and tended to stay at home as much as possible. If I was out I would panic if my DH wasn't with me, just in case she needed feeding at a moment I found awkward.
This definitely caused me to have a slight resentment toward my DD and my relationship with her improved once I had stopped breastfeeding.
* BUT *
Despite all this I managed to breastfeed for 7 months and, hand on heart, I would say that it was the hardest thing I have ever acheived in my life. I am so proud of myself and, should I ever have another child, I will without a doubt try to breastfeed again.

mum2toby · 22/04/2003 16:30

Grommit - my story is almost exactly like yours!! Except I only lasted 4 days. Ds didn't take to it and neither did I. I was SOOOO disappointed and really beat myself up about it. I think I will try again with the next one, but I'll have an open mind about it and won't force the situation.
It's such a personal thing, I don't particularly like anything touching me there....

It has to be right for Mum and baby.

Original poster
edgarcat · 22/04/2003 18:10

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pupuce · 22/04/2003 18:49

edgercat - if you can manage to get it painless (amd most people do after a while... usually nax 6 weeks) then BF can become not only dead easy and convenient but so nice too...
Keep at it!

jennifersofia · 22/04/2003 19:52

well done edgarcat, for what you have done thus far. I b/f my 1st, was in a lot of pain for about 5 mths and was definitely the hardest thing I have ever done. I was bloody minded about it, and now think perhaps shouldn't have been so stubborn and should have done mixed feeding. In the end, we got round the corner and carried on until she was 11 mths. It was so hard in the beginning - I really was not coping and getting extremely angry to the point where it was difficult to feel my relationship with the babe. I felt quite cheated that I wasn't having this rosy bonding experience. Having said all that, I am glad that I persisted as I ended up liking it. I think the main thing is that both you and the baby are happy. We shouldn't be railroaded into things by either the b/f or formula feeding posse.

deegward · 24/04/2003 21:01

God, I just agree with everyone!! Or is that just my hormones ds2 is now 4 weeks, and due to various factors (DH) have again introduced more bottles than I intended to, but its so easy!

I have terrible pain to start with but now my ds takes from either me or the bottle with ease, and chooses which he wants, although I do have the feeling that perhaps he doesn't get too much from me.

Please everyone feel no guilt if you go on to bottles, when they are 5 and standing in the playground, do y ou think they will trun around and thank you for being bf, they are just happy to be there. But congrats to all who carry on bf I just find it so time consuming, and with a toddler.... oh no I'm making excuses again!

Tia · 24/04/2003 21:37

Has anyone tried Lansinoh ointment? It fabulous, acts like a lubricant so that those rough little tongues don't scrape your nipples. You put it on after a feed but don't need to wash it off before feeding again - even if they feed 5 minutes later. You can get it from some websites, or a few mail order companies.

Original poster
edgarcat · 01/05/2003 18:59

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codswallop · 16/06/2003 12:55

am on 12weeks now and feeling pleased with myself until this weekend when my left boob has a bruise type thing and wound - I think from poor postioning one night when I was tired..

Bum. It hurts. Is not thrush or mastitis.

whymummy · 16/06/2003 12:58

i couldn`t do it with dd,she was born with a tooth and ended up drinking more blood than milk it was agony

codswallop · 16/06/2003 13:00

yikes! I know someone else who had a toothy newborn..

Yes I was so crap with ds2 that I am exceptionally proud of myself. With all of them My (ahem) "upper body" looked like a horror film...

whymummy · 16/06/2003 13:02

i was born with a tooth too but my mum breastfed us all till 12 months,she was tougher than me

SueW · 16/06/2003 17:57

whymummy, she probably had some better help/advice/support than you did. Not tougher. Don't put yourself down ((hug))

whymummy · 16/06/2003 18:44

thanks sue

crazynow · 16/06/2003 19:35

Glad to see I'm not the only one who had problems with breast feeding. Everyone I see seems to take to it like ducks to water.

I did mangage to breast feed to 5 months, but had to bottle feed as well as I couldn't produce enough milk for ds (very hungry baby) and very sore boobs to start off with.

Hopfully I'll be better when baby no.2 comes in Sept.

codswallop · 16/06/2003 20:15

get some Lansinoh lanolin cream - very good stuff but hard to find - that made a difference with me

happyspider · 24/06/2003 16:07

I feel less guilty now reading this thread as I have a 2 weeks old boy and find the breastfeeding time daunting too. He doesn't like it, I get very sore, so this is agony for both of us.
I love watching him while he's at it, but the pain is sometimes unbearable.
I have to top him up with formula milk as my milk is not enough and he's constantly hungry.

Can anyone explain to me what is thrush and how you spot it? I have a nagging feeling that this could be the reason why it is so painful for both of us... but I am not sure.

codswallop · 24/06/2003 16:10

yes yes - is there white apots in his mouth? are your boobs poster paint red? Get to the drs asap. Mear(resident bf expert) advises against topping up. Honestly my ds3 is a stone (as of todays weigh in) and I bf him no formula at all so dont top up.

somneone once said to me it is hard to seperate the stress of having a new baby with the stress of bf..I think thats true.

Keep posting!! if i can do it then anyone can! I love it now. (there I said it!)

codswallop · 24/06/2003 16:10

Ps ( iwas edgarcat)

codswallop · 24/06/2003 16:13

Ps i ditched the bottle - scouldnt be arsed to do it - he has water in it now just in case I need to go out so he can take the teat

morocco · 24/06/2003 17:00

hiya happyspider
you'll find lots of stuff on symptoms etc around on mumsnet but personally my boobs were b**y sore all the time and esp after a feed(I think the after a feed bit is one of the signs that it isn't just cracked nipples). I hadn't noticed but my nipples as well as being cracked were much pinker than normal and kind of shiny.
Your baby might not show signs of thrush - mine didn't but he had previously had thrush on his bum and in his mouth and it looked like it had cleared up, but obviously not.

Your health visitor should be able to give you a leaflet with lots of info on it about symptoms - I think the breastfeeding network wrote it.

A word of warning - your gp might not 'believe ' in thrush on your nipples so best to be well informed if pos before you go.

Good luck and hope the pain goes soon

tiktok · 24/06/2003 17:12

Bf shouldn't hurt!! Thrush is a possibility, but at this stage it is far far more likely to be your positionng an attachment need amending - do not listen to people who say all looks ok, and then leave you high and dry. Find someone who will help.

You say the baby doesn't like it - if he is not feeding as effectively as he might be, then he may not be as happy as he should....he will remain unsettled despite feed-a-thons.

Topping up may look like it helps in the short term but it may create its own probs in the long term.

Please get help - NCT bf line is 0870 444 8708. All the best!