Any advice? Annoying bf behaviour from a 10 week old

[SarahLeosMum]

Feeding is going pretty well after a difficult start but I've struggled in the last 4 days or so. Baby is fine once latched on but it's hard to get her on. I've resorted to having her suck my finger, then pulling it out and shoving my nipple in, or dangling my boob in her mouth then moving to a sensible position once she's on. Neither is ideal! Any ideas what's going on?

What position are you generally feeding in? Also - what was the difficult start as it may all be related?

I'm feeding her in the position that you get told to at the start, with her tummy against mine. I do't do any others as I'm scared of doing it wrong!!

At the start the main issues were flat nipples and over full boobs meaning that she found it very hard to latch on, she also hated the left side, we got her over that by putting her on the right for a minute then whipping her off and putting her on the left. She only started reliably going on the left side by herself at about 5 weeks. BF Councillor suggested it was because my boobs differ from each other so she had learn two different boobs. It's fair to say it took both of us a fair bit of learning to get things established.

Oh, and when I'm trying to get her latched, sometimes she will go on for about 10 seconds then comes off with crys and arching back.

Sounds a bit like my DS who likes to know the milk is there straight away and latches on much better if I had express a tiny amount just until I get let-down, and then she can taste it as she latches on - she really doesn't like to work for it at all! This means that sometimes if let-down is slow she fusses on and off, on and off, and doesn't suck properly enough to get things going - and then the stress of trying to get her to latch on makes let-down even slower, especially when out and about. So that's what works for us.

She also is not as big a fan of my left boob (I think it's OK myself!) and I sometimes kid her into thinking she's feeding from my right boob by propping her up with cushions so her body is to the left of my left boob, IYSWIM. And don't be scared of doing it wrong - there is no such thing when it comes to BF. it's just great that you're doing it at all. Stick with it.

Oh, sometimes my let-down is better if I remember to relax my shoulders - I think BF mums carry a lot of tension in their shoulders without realising, especially if you're contorting to get nipples into reluctant mouths. So ask DP for a shoulder massage every now and then too!

That should be 'hand express' BTW - one-handed typing not so accurate!

I could never get on with the tummy to tummy feeding while DS was very small. He fed better in the rugby ball postion, body tucked under my arm on whichever side he was feeding. He latched on better and fed well so I didn't get sore nipples.

As he got older he mastered latching on in any position but it took time for both of us to learn.

Smellyeli I know what you mean about boobs - I thought mine were quite nice but I've since been told I've got flat nipples and mismatched boobs, mind you I'm still quite fond of them.

I'll try expressing a bit, she might like that. She is much worse when tired, which would support your theory about not wanting to work for it. I'll also try and relax my shoulders, I know that is a problem I've got and I've forgotten to make a point of relaxing recently.

Ajm200, maybe I am confident enough now to have a try with different positions, I'll have a go tomorrow morning when my toddler goes to play with my mum.

Thanks for your replies.

I agree with smellyeli.
could be impatience due to slow let down so I would try expressing a bit first- mine did this.
sometimes it can be trapped wind either a waiting trump or burp iyswim. I used to lie dd2 across my knee for a few minutes then sit her back up quickly, usually got rid of it. Mine used to thrash and cry as well. I think the crying is frustration, wanting to feed but can't get their wind out.

Agree with all the ideas so far. I would also add suggestion of feeding lying down as it can help you both relax into it and let it happen. (I found it still worked well even when ds was quite ill when only a week old and neither of us knew quite what we were doing yet!).

Best of luck

I just wanted to give an update. Things have been a lot better the past two days. I think it is because I've been paying more attention to feeding cues and the legnth of time since the last feed. I think I had got a bit lazy, and whenever she had a bit of a whinge just thought she was hungry when she wasn't really.

Thanks for the help.

That's great - glad things are going well for you!