Weaning DD. Is it a good idea or not? And how do I do it?

[sausagemcgrah]

Hi everyone, I am trying to decide whether to wean DD or not, and how to go about it (and what will be the consequence of weaning). Any (all) help and advice greatly appreciated.

So:

DD is 14 months old and feeds twice a day, once in the morning (usually between 4.30am and 7am), and once before bed.

I am 9 weeks pregnant, and to be honest, feel that I want a bit of a break from breastfeeding before the new baby arrives. I do absolutely love breastfeeding though, and am not 100% sure I want to give up, hence I'm just sort of mulling over how it would work and if it's worth it.

The problems:
DD wont take a bottle and is not used to drinking milk or anything in any great quantity from a beaker. She would not recognise a bedtime beaker of milk as a substitute for breast milk. She has never had her main milk feeds from anything but me. (However she will drink cows milk from a beaker in small amounts.)

DD either falls asleep or becomes very very drowsy on the boob every night. She is then quite happy to be peopped into bed and drifts straight off to sleep. Without the breastfeed she has no wind down time.

Also - If I stop breastfeeding her...

What will happen if she wakes early in the morning, i.e for her 4.30 feed? Would I go and get a beaker of milk for her from the kitchen (hassle!) or would I do a spot of 'sleep management' (no idea what this would entail) and try to persuade her that this is not a time to have milk anymore. The good thing about her breastfeed is that she then falls back asleep again.

Arghhhhhhhhhhh. It's all so complicated.

So:
How would I stop the feeds.
Would DD just wake up again in the night as she might be hungry?
Do you think it's a good idea bearing in mind DD's early morning feed?
How easy it is to wean altogether - how long do you think it would take?

Thanks

But do you really want to?

You could do resettling at 04.30 (?DH?DP) but she may give up herself as your milk changes for the new baby?

I think I want to.

Do you know when the milk changes? I was wondering if she might self wean due to changes in taste or similar, but don't know whether to hold out for this or not.

Have never done any resettling either during the night. have always just whipped out the boobie! Good idea though. I might have to try this.

Some BM answers here

I would suggest lessening the feed length and introducing a comfort item like a cloth/soft washable toy that smells like you initially.

What happens to your supply and milk varies from one person to another. DS was on two feeds a day when I got pregnant and started to self-wean himself down from that from about 23 weeks. By the time DD was born he was nursing once a week or less.

I recommend the book Adventures in Tandem Nursing: Breastfeeding During Pregnancy and Beyond by Hilary Flower. In spite of the title there's a lot of stuff in there about whether continuing to breastfeed when pregnant or with a newborn is right for you and possible approaches to weaning/cutting down if you decide that's what you want to do.

Thanks for the link MatNanPlus, it looks very helpful. I'll go and read it properly in a moment.

Good idea too re. lessening feed length. To be honest I don't think she feeds that much. It's so much more of a comfort / routine thing, so the comfort item is a good idea too.

That book sounds perfect PortAndLemon. I'll check out the local library for it. It is a huge decision. I really would like DD to be more independant (from me) before the new baby is born. I have never spent night away from her, and ideally would like DH to be able to put her to bed every once in a while.

If I knew that DD would do what your son di, I'd keep feeding her for now. It's just the uncertainty of what will happen.

Where do you feed her Sausage?

The same place both times?

Could DH then pop her into bed and get up to her in the morning and whisk her off downstairs to break the morning routine?

Other mum's on here have said just a few days of that and then they could cuddle without the bf being an issue?