Does a big baby make a difference?

[BorgLady]

I'm so excited to be able to post somewhere other than the pregnancy forum!!

DS is just over 2wks old and has been exclusively breastfed. While I was in hospital, one of the mws warned me that because he was big (9lbs2oz birthweight)he would need feeding a lot.

He wakes 3-4 times in the night for feeds, but during the day, he feeds all the time. The past few days, it seems as though if he's not at the breast, he's crying and rooting. If he's out in his pram he cries constantly, even when picked up and cuddled.

I am pretty sure he is getting enough milk at feeds, as he dozes and eventually falls off the nipple looking sated with milk in his mouth, it's just that five minutes later, he's crying and rooting again.

What is starting to annoy me is DP's implication that by demand feeding, I'm somehow spoiling him. FGS, DS is 2 weeks old! He's been listening to someone at work too, who told him that we should be giving DS supplementary water so that he won't get a tummy ache.

Please reassure me that I'm doing the right things!

You are doing everything right!
They do feed alot at this age,it gets and keeps a good supply.

Your dh and his colleague are talking shite.

Well done

you are doing fabulously - your dp and his colleague Know Not!

if it helps you can tell them that anthropological studies show that babies naturally would feed several times an hour if they had their way - it's our pesky habit of wearing shirts, putting them in prams etc, that slows them down at all.

that said, my ds was not capable of being put down - even when he wasn't feeding, he wanted to be held, some of them are just like that. You may find it helpful to invest in a sling, especially one of those pouches that allow you to bf while he's in it.

well done you and your bonny ds

You are right to demand feed. It will settle down. Your DH's colleague is a know-nothing bozo

forgot about stupid drunken friday night name change!

I had a large ds and he was a big eater.

It sounds like you are doing the right things. Far better for you to have a hungry, frequent eater than to have the stress of a baby that is "losing" weight and seems not to "eat enough".

It is, unfortunately, quite normal for partners to feel a little bit jealous of the bond between a mother and her newborn, and I wonder if your dh's comments reflect his own insecurity rather than anything that you are doing wrong. Tell him it is normal and helpful for a breastfed newborn to feed frequnently, but that in the coming months it will develop into a more regular pattern. Can you think about expressing milk, say for the evening, so that your dp has a chance to do a feed? For some fathers it really helps them accept the new situation if they have some hands on involvement.

Oh, and congratulations to you both.

You are doing the right things - ignore dh and his work colleagues - why are they experts? My ds was 10ib 2oz and I was told that he would need feeding LESS often as he had a bigger tummy and could therefore go for longer between feeds. I've know idea if this is true (having never had a smaller baby to compare!) but he certainly was hungry

my ds was a big baby & I bf on demand - everything was fine. If you bf when he wants he'll get the milk he needs.At 2 weeks & more all my kids bf almost constantly day & night - it's just what little ones need to do.

If you give extra water he'll get fluid with no fats/energy/growth factors. Your dh collegues are talking rubbish.

Bluebutterfly has a good point about expressing. We did this from about 2 weeks old and dh used to do the "dream feed" ie last feed before we went to bed - I know he really enjoyed the chance he had to spend time alone with ds (even though ds was asleep for most of it!)

DS1&DS2 were 8lb 7.5oz and 10lb 3oz respectively, the size difference between them didn't make an iota of difference.

Your DS is feeding perfectly, You can always tell dp how not feeding on demand, i.e force feeding every so many hours could possibly lead to DS not recognising his pangs of hunger=feeding time and cause problems for him later in life, eating too much and becoming obese.

Well done and keep up the good work... and take no notice of your dp's colleague - giving water is a bad idea. Your baby is simply boosting your supply.
Perhaps you should point your dp in this direction.
Then he'll better informed on how to advise you
Oh and don't let anyone tell you you'll need to wean your ds earlier because he is a big baby - that's nonsense too My friend had a big baby - 9lb2, only started weaning just shy of 6months and he is as healthy as a horse and growing like a weed!

It does get better!

Women can breastfeed twins and more. Well done, BorgLady.

Thank you so much, it's great to get some reassurance. I was convinced I would find breastfeeding difficult with Teddy since he is my first baby. While I was pregnant I bought all the gear to FF just in case, but we both took to BF straight away. So far I haven't even had a sore nipple. I really have been blessed!

Consequently, I really didn't do enough reading on the subject beforehand. Thankfully my mum was a champion breastfeeder in her day and has been a super source of advice.

I think my DP just needs to realise that I am tired, hormonal and still not feeling tip-top (had rather bad anaemia after the birth), and just because I say "Oh no, he's crying again", it doesn't mean that I'm not coping.

TBH, when Teddy does sleep, I miss him and can't wait for him to wake up so I can feed him again!

Oh, forgot to add ... I haven't managed to express at all! Tried it a couple of times but it took ages as wasn't getting anything more than drops out at a time.

Would you suggest a pump?

If you want to try expressing, I found the Avent Isis pump quite good (it's a hand pump). Still v early days for expressing though

i think 2 weeks is quite early to start expressing, i'd get your supply going first by just feeding as much as he wants and wait a few more weeks if possible.

Borglady, if you are trying to stimulate supply, the best 'pump' is your ds - he is the most efficient machine there is. The amount you can express is no indication of the amount of milk your ds can extract.

The best time to try expressing is in the morning before a feed, when you are fullest.

You are doing the right thing. Stick with it and definately no water needed at 2 wks. I give my 19wk old water because during the hot weather she refused to bf but was becoming dehydrated (crumbly poo). I know lots of people will shoot me down but my baby was exactly the same and was 10lbs at birth. I found that by expressing and getting an over supply made it easier for dd2 to get milk quickly and therefore she didn't get so tired and fall asleep before a full feed iyswim. This way she did go longer (about 2hrly) and because she wasn't feeding so often she got less wind. The crying could be wind i.e. she wants to feed but trapped wind is making it uncomfortable for her. If the crying starts when she gets laid down it is probably wind.

Blueshoes 'the best pump is your ds'. Yes he is however, he will sleep sometimes and expressing then will mean an extra boost for your supply. Also, because it is supply and demand I agree the body produces enough milk as he suckles more, however, by getting an over supply I found that my dd2 found it easier to take a full feed before falling to sleep with the effort of breast feeding.

once you get to about 6 weeks your milk will be well and trluy established and dc will have started to be able to take longer feeds and as a result last a bit longer between feeds.

until then keep doing as you are. once you hit the 6 week mark it becomes easier to use a pump as well. i couldn't get anything till then from pump.

your doing fab . and 3-4 night feeds is not that bad. my dc would want a feed every 2 hours. regardless if it was day or night for first couple of months.

Tori, whether expressing boosts supply depends on how efficient expressing is for BorgLady.

I started expressing from Day 1 as my dd was in NICU/SCBU and was advised to do so. I had the same experience as BorgLady in that I could barely cover the bottom of the storage bottle with my paltry efforts. And it was stressing me out to wake up at 3 hourly intervals in the night to express only to get hardly anything. If BorgLady has a perfectly healthy and thriving ds, why is there a need to express at all when she can just put her baby to the boob more often?

I am afraid I disagree that bf-ing requires effort on a healthy baby's part. Even my dd, with her dodgy heart, was never tired out from it. If anything, it relaxed her.

I am also not sure about being able to pump more 6 weeks down the line. If anything, I had oversupply at the start and rock hard breasts, and then my supply started to calm down over the passing weeks to synchronise with my baby's actual intake - BTW I also have a healthy ds to be able to compare. I would leak more (especially in the mornings) in early days that later weeks. But perhaps that is just me.

i found it easier becuase the nipples were not as new to being used. for first few weeks they weren't producing more than 2-3 squirty holes (i have no idea how else to put that)

but by 6 weeks it was flowing out everywhere, very quickly with about 6-7 holes quirting.

that way too much detail but explains why i found it quicker and easier to ue pump. i also found using a warm clean hand much easier than a pump.