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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

8 weeks of breastfeeding and I'm on the verge of giving up... HELP!!

39 replies

Becky77 · 07/08/2008 20:44

Arghhhh the pain just isn't going away... I've tried every position... and things have got ever so slowly better... But it's 2 steps forward 1 step back and I'm finding myself getting agitated at my DD... I think it's time for me to give up for both our sakes...

The only things keeping me going is the hope her mouth will grow enough by 10 weeks for her to stop scraping the edge of my nipple and the weight loss benefits!

But seriously... I am soooooo upset by this I can't believe it has been so difficult and that after all this time it still isn't working how it should

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beansprout · 07/08/2008 20:45

Have you been able to speak to a b/f counsellor? It sounds like there may be a slight problem with the latch which they may be able to help with. The NCT helpline is great too.

WilfSell · 07/08/2008 20:49

Has someone experienced (ie a BF specialist) actually checked your latch?

When you say her mouth is scraping the edge of your nipple, can you say exactly what you mean...?

Please don't give up - assuming you want to carry on - before you've tried to get help with the latch...

Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:04

I have had loads of help over the phone and at a breastfeeding group... None of them can see a problem with my positioning or latch...

It feels like the side of her gum at the top is nicking the edge of my nipple and it is wearing away at a sore patch that's developed.

Both nipples were badly cracked before and have now healed so I know the position changes have helped but now this is happening on the right side I feel like throwing the towel in

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Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:07

She clicks lots and looses suction aswell... I don't think she is using her tongue properly.

How about if I use a nipple shield on that one side?

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constancereader · 07/08/2008 21:10

Was there a bf specialist at the support group? I had about seven midwives tell me my latch was fine, but they were wrong. (A good latch does not result in a gaping crack in the nipple). If there wasn't a specialist there then I would try to find one.

How are you treating the sore patch? I found Jelonet was the only thing that cured me in the end.

WilfSell · 07/08/2008 21:11

OK really really does sound like a latch issue - sorry. I've been there with clicking etc.

Suspect also because it's worse on one side, it might be she's too far over or back by a tiny fraction.

According to one BFC when I had real sore issues, it's most common to have problems on one side because either your dominant hand is pushing too far, or your less dominant hand is not holding far enough...

In this case, I'd really recommend you ring the BF helplines - all of them if you must - and ask who can come out to you to spend lots of time helping to fix your latch.

Who ran the BF group you went to?

beansprout · 07/08/2008 21:12

I had lots of midwives tell me that my latch with ds2 was fine when I knew that it wasn't .

If it's fine, it really shouldn't be causing you these sorts of problems. There is a difference between "fine" and someone not knowing what the problem is!

Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:14

@ WilfSell - The Breastfeeding Network trained the people at the support group I went to.

I tried to get someone to come out to see me but no-one can now because of the summer holidays apparently

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Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:17

@ constancereader - I've been using Jelonet for a couple of weeks and it's not the miracle cure I'd hoped for... So now I'm suspecting an infection...

There was a specialist at the support group but she said she couldn't see what the problem was and she was stumped.

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Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:20

More info... My boobs are pretty big and my nipples face down and out to the side so I've been propping them up with a rolled up towel. I found this really helped to start and hoped it'd be the end of my problems but it isn't and it also makes feeding in public a real embarressment... Another reason to give up.

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Bumperlicious · 07/08/2008 21:21

Becky, sorry you are having such a tough time. It really is two steps forward 1step back. I mean this in a way that is meant to help you not put you off, but it was probably 4 months till bfing really clicked with me. I remember someone else saying that on here and it really did give me hope, it can still get better.

Anyway, like wilfsell says, I would guess it's positioning. Is her tummy to you? And have you adjusted your position to allow for her growth? I found pain started again a few months in an that was why.

Nipple shields, well, some people swear by them, and some people (esp HCP) don't recommend them at all. You do what ever helps you.

I would keep badgering people to get you latch checked, it shouldn't be that painful. The thing is that while your nipples are cracked even if you get a good latch it might still be painful, so if you shift position, what you need to consider is has the pain decreased?

Good luck, you can do this! I had soooo many threads up at any one time in the first 5 months of bfing, and I am still going at 13 months.

WilfSell · 07/08/2008 21:23

Sorry to push for so much info, but given what you've said, can you see the latch when you're feeding?

Are there some positions which are easier than others to get a good latch?

Please don't be disheartened - it took me weeks to be pain free and that's with all 3 babies... But after that it got so much better once I'd cracked latching on...

doggiesayswoof · 07/08/2008 21:24

I do feel your pain. I got tired of mws and bfcs telling me ds's (and before him, dd's) latch was perfect - my nipples still wouldn't heal.

I used jelonet with dd and ended up with an infection - have you tried lansinoh? I'd also recommend green baby nipple balm.

Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:26

The thing is I'm not that fussy with positioning on the other side but she just gets it and it's fine, no pain... But on the right side she doesn't get it and no matter how I position her she manages to chomp on my nipple in some way.

Is it better to have her horizontal or diagonal?

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WilfSell · 07/08/2008 21:28

I think the horizontal or diagonal thing depends on how big the baby is and how strong you are...

I had massive babies (all around 9.5lbs) and couldn't always hold them as horizontally as suggested... I found a pillow to hold them up helpful for a long time...

doggiesayswoof · 07/08/2008 21:28

Should also have said that in the end I fed dd until she was 11 months (when she self weaned) - I think we finally cracked it when she was about 4 months. It will work itself out if you stick with it.

Agree with others about pushing to get a face to face meeting with a specialist.

Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:29

@ Wilfsell - what do you mean "see the latch"?

@ doggiesayswoof - what was your infection like? I don't think I have thrush as baby is fine but I suspect I may have something as healing is taking way longer than it should... What did you take for the infection?

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Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:32

My GP has said there is no one she can refer me to

@ Wilfsell - I find the horizontal position causes me more pain so I try to have her diagonal.

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Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:33

I don't think I can last until 4 months... I think I'll buy some nipple shields tomorrow so this nipple has a chance to heal and then try again without.

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Original poster
Becky77 · 07/08/2008 21:35

Right I best get some sleep before she wakes up again. Thanks for all your help... Any more advice welcome

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constancereader · 07/08/2008 21:37

Have you been checked for thrush in that nipple?

Jelonet only cured me once the latch was sorted.

I only started to be pain free at about 10 weeks. It felt like someone was slamming my nipple in the door when I latched on, a cold sweat used to break out all over my body.

Have you tried feeding lying down?

WilfSell · 07/08/2008 21:37

I meant can you actually see her mouth on the nipple?

fishie · 07/08/2008 21:39

becky if she is better on one side than the other then don't turn her over, just move her across to other side, so sort of tuck her under your arm. like rugby hold but keeping the better positioning.

agree with others, there must be a problem with the latch and a million people can tell you they can't see it, just means they can't help you, not that that the problem doesn't exist!

i had very similar problems and am so glad i persevered, but it was bloody hard painful work.

doggiesayswoof · 07/08/2008 21:43

My infection was wrongly diagnosed as thrush at first - was quite red, inflamed, a bit itchy. Antibiotic ointment sorted it out eventually - the stuff they give you for eye infections. Chloramphenicol I think (sp?)

Bumperlicious · 07/08/2008 22:14

Would second the "rugby ball" hold if you can do it.

What about a position where you are lying almost flat, maybe propped up with some pillows and the baby is face down on your chest and has to find the nipple herself. She will be able to do it, and it is a much more natural position. The Biological Nurturing website has more details.