Really crap day - baby losing weight and been advised to ff

[EllieG]

That's it basically - DD who is 10 days old got weighed today and she had lost over a pound which is too much. MW knows how important it is to me to BF but said she would have to speak to paediatrician. He initally said to give formula after every BF but she pointed out that would be crap for my supply so they said to give one ff in the evening, which have just done.

I have had probs BF from the start, have very flat nipples so been using shields, and they think this is the reason why she is not gaining weight properly. Thing is, she is alert, pink, sleeping and feeding (I thought) well, pooing and weeing properly and generally happy. DP queried whether she might actually have been weighed incorrectly at hospital and given wrong birth weight, which they said was possible, but unlikely, and that we would never know. Today I was advised to express after every feed to boost my milk supply and we have had the worst day EVER. She clearly hasn't had enough food and hasn't slept properly and been miserable all day. I gave her a bottle of the expressed milk and she's just had her 3oz of formula, whereupon she has finally gone to sleep. DP said 'Ah well that was the problem then, we just need to ff her, she was too hungry'

I feel just horrible. Have been crying all day, feel like such a failure as a mother that I can't feed my daughter and she isn't gaining weight properly. MW said that, 'she isn't starving but she's not thriving' and I feel so bad. But have followed their advice today and she has been really hungry and unhappy and other days she hasn't been. They are coming back tomorrow and monday and if she hasn't gained 40g by monday they said I have to ff. DP doesn't understand why I feel so rotten and I know is not logical but I feel like I've failed her.

Sorry for long moaning post. Can't stop crying now is so stupid. Advice please.

Ellie, if you suspect the birthweight, then you may be right to suspect the intervention of formula and expressing....it's good you are seeing someone on Tuesday. Raise the issue of birthweight with them, too.

Hensmum - it is not a great sign to have lost 11 per cent, but it is so not a sign the baby needs formula (unless there is something else going on). It is a sign that the breastfeeding needs fixing...and not by limiting feeds to 3 hrly and 15 mins a side with a formula top up. That does not fix breastfeeding. Instead it undermines confidence and stops milk from being produced in the quantities needed.

You did really well to overcome that.

You may be right about it having a longer lasting effect though - those early days are important for setting the scene, and establishing a robust supply.

Next time, you'll know a lot more

(BTW, Ellie doesn't need to eat well or keep fluids up except for her own health - it will not make a difference to her bf.)

Ellie exactly the same happened to me with Ella , I seriously suspected the weight conversion had been wrong, she was supposed to have been 7.14 and by day 10 she was 7.0 - I was a bit amazed at how heavy they said she was at birth as she was smaller and felt lighter than Amy (7.5) Anyhoo - She was feeding well, latched well, pooing and peeing as she should, so my midwife called the hospital and we both talked to the paed, and impressed on him how everything was tickety-boo apart from the weight and we felt that there was no need to panic (we also knew I was pretty acutely anaemic- have you considered that? I was chugging double spatone for 3 weeks). We loaned a hospital pump from the local surestart group,and worked out according to a formula my midwife had, how much EBM I'd need to give over a day to produce a slow rise in weight -I wish i had a copy, it was one for breastfeeding,not for formula supplements.
Anyway I ended up giving 80mls a day, by cup , it took until she was a month old before she'd got to birthweight+ , but since then, she's come on in leaps and bounds, She's not going to be on the same centile for weight and height as she's on 95th for height and was on 50th for weight at birth , but she's fine at 4 months, and i still wonder about how accurate the first weight was..

dont tense about the weight lose in babys apparently my MW told me its nrm for babys to lose weight in the first week due to lack f milk supply, if you cant BF how about pumping it out and ggive it thru a bottle i did wid my daghter and found the supply wasnt effected as much, at least she got it.

sory for mis texting i'm also tryin to watch a movie

ellie, I've bben away all week and have just seen this.

sending you some big hugs lovely lady. Yu have had some great advice here, and I have nothing to add really, except be assured that you are doing all the right things and that you are a great mum.

I hope you can see someone locally and that you can get some good support.

I gave DD the odd bottle in the early days to tide me over a very rough time with a nasty wound infection and sheer exhaustion. We went on to feed exclusively for 8 mnths. I think as long as you are expressing the missed feed then it shouldn't interfere with your supply too much, but tiktok is the expert there.

wrt to the flat nipples, there is a device you can get called a niplette (by Avent)which is upposed to draw the nipple out to allow baby to latch better....have you tried one? I don't know if they are any good, but someone might have had some experience of using one.

Take care lovely and have some {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}

I hope you let us know how the baby cafe went and that you manage to keep going.

It took us 3 days in hospital with expressed colostrum being syringe fed to get feeding sorted, but I now have a monster baby that's exclusively breastfed - he's 15lb 9 at 16 weeks so once you've got it sorted it can all go well!

Hiya Ellie,

Howsit all going? I had much the same struggle, and my bubs has JUST regained his birthweight + 2oz. He's 5 weeks and 5 days.

So it took a long time, and was a real struggle, but we got there in the end.

I think you need to BF as much as poss, and express to really build your supply. It took me quite a while, and was knackering but it's all now flowing well.

Hope you're managing to get some good RL support, as this really helps, too.

You're doing a great job!