why dont younger mums breas feed

[codswallop]

on the whole?
18 year ikd nighbour has just had a baby !) musch to her parents horror.. and isnt even trying to b feeed.
why is this?

I bet coddy really regrets posting this thread now

crunchie, what do you think of the 'leggings' leaflet, linked to in my post below? Would that have helped you? Or would you have preferred a 'how to do it' one?

I was given the "you know what they're getting argument" and "they'll sleep longer, be more content and be more full up."

I think a lot of this comes from our mothers generation where formula was the norm, if you're young stressed and emotional from having a baby who you going to believe a poster on the wall or your mum or other relatives?

Tiktok-i've only met these women in "social situations", have never had any reason to contact LLL. Considering it took each of them about 2 mins to start lecturing about the benefits of BF in each case and in one case the woman said "don't you love your baby enough to do the best for her?"..(Also why would i want to contact an organisation promoting bf when i have no interest in bfing personally? )

Should add that I know enough about stats to be unconcerned by lots of the middle-ear, childhood obesity stuff.

can I just say - without any guilt whatsoever - I didn't want to breastfeed - full stop - no excuses - no reason except I didn't WANT TO - okay? got that? savvy?

You could argue the abortion point - my body - my choice.

I also fed them on jam butties, chips, fish fingers and peas - although dd drew the line at the peas.

So when are you coming to arrest me?

marialuisa, not suggesting you campaign to get rid of these women, or officially complain about them!!

They sound pretty hopeless, to be honest.

Can't find the floral leggings pic!! However read the midirs (?) leaflet on breast v bottle. I thinkl that is quite good. WHat I would like to see is sensible information prior to birth and then practical support afterwards, you cannot do a 'how to' leaflet on BF as everyone is different. ALthough there are some similarities. I would like to see at least 2 specially trained mw on every postnatal ward. MW who have had extra training and that their MAIN responsibility is feeding (all types). ALso community MW who visit (mine wasn't bad) should be specialised and have extra tarining in this. HV should all be shot (different subject, but one reason why women give up too soon, they are pressurised into force feeding babies to gain weight, all charts are based on formula fed babies weight gain).

At every level there should be support available easily tp HELP women make thier choice and help them continue IF THEY WANT TO.

I mix fed from 5 weeks as it suited me, but this was in part due to the pain I had had. Only 1 bittle a day, but it helped me continue BF until 8 months

I'm 17, had Theo when I was 16... I tried so damned hard to breastfeed him! But try having big flobby boobs and a five pound baby suffocating under them...it just doesn't work! I was determined though, but had to give in, I have expressed almost non stop for the last 9 months. Which was pure hell!! I only had a hand pump for the last 4 months or so....

You may as well ask - why don't scallieschavstownies breastfeed, when it's so easy and cheap and all.

Sorry but I get grrry when people add to the already pretty dire reputation of teen mums. I must admit, I do break the mould I haven't met another teen mum who's breastfed for more than a week, or even one who makes the food like I do for the little un rather than buying pots..

Oh and I read half of this post so lol may be repeating lots but I got no support, in fact I just get a look of shock from my health visitor, and nothing more! I had no friends who were mums... my own mum lives 350 miles away! Breastfeeding can be the hardest thing in the universe for a first time mum on top of everything else... I think there need to be more breastfeeding counsellors out there to actually come round to your house and support you if it's on your notes that you were trying to BF... After waxing lyrical like that though, I still believe it's a personal choice and I wouldn't look down my nose at anyone who didn't attempt to do it! Sorry for the complete unexpected rant that happened there..

fastasleep, I want to give you a medal and a hug, and to punch that health visitor on the nose! Theo is a lucky boy

Fastasleep - I think the thing about having no friends who were mums is an important part of the answer. What do you think made you 'break the mould', as you put it?

I think I've just always had a logical mind - as I had 9 months to think about things before he arrived lol I researched a whole load of stuff and decided what would be best for him in advance... I think I'm a 67 year old in a 17 year old's body sometimes!

Having no mum friends possibly helped! I didn't have to be a sheep and copy them, because I was doing it on my own, if you see what I mean... OoOh also, I find LLL people very scary! The last one I talked to was trying to get me to train Theo back onto the breast (even though he just bites me extremely hard and makes me cry) because 'you're not doing it naturally!'

Ok, I really don't want to inflame this, but am genuinely interested in what made people who decided to bottlefeed from the off make that decision. What was the key factor for you?
I am NOT criticising people for bottlefeeding, just interested in what makes people choose that option.

Hi fastaleep

Well done - that is a really tough thing you have done. I also had to espress longterm, and again I had small baby and large boobs (or nipples at least) - despite what the midwives said the baby just couldn't open its mouth wide enough .

As ever generalisations always complete misrepresent lots of individuals.

Edam - I started to breast feed my first (lasted two weeks) and wasn't committed to it at all. The key factors for me were

Being bottlefed myself, and therefore my mum not having experience.

The midwife not being particularly helpful whilst in hospital.

Formula being freely available on the mat ward (this was late eighties so not sure if this is still the case!)

Rubbish HV who wasn't a mum herself and didn't offer any advice when I felt ds was always hungry.

In short lack of support resulting in lack of confidence.

I breast fed my other two for longer but not exclusively.

A thought experiment for breastfeeding mums out there: If strong scientific evidence was discovered showing that formula was the best thing for your baby, would you stop breastfeeding? (I wouldn't.)

I don't think bottlefeeding, or breastfeeding, is a logical decision. I didn't weigh up the evidence and decide to breastfeed, I knew I wanted to. Why? Probably because I'd always been told it was best. A friend I had in my 20s breastfed her daughter until she was 2.5y. I just figured it was the normal thing.

Nobody is saying "I know breast is best, and I know I could do it easily, but I've decided to bottlefeed out of sheer evillness." Some people aren't comfortable with the idea of breastfeeding. Many more people wanted to breastfeed, and didn't succeed. Everyone tries to do what they believe to be best for their babies and themselves.

I suspect that people who decided that breastfeeding just wasn't for them, weren't exposed to a lot of breastfeeding before they had their baby, or weren't exposed to positive stories of breastfeeding.

I suspect that a lot of people had problems partly because breastfeeding isn't normal in our culture. If we see our toddler walking in a way that isn't "right", we know right away. We all know what walking is supposed to look like, in toddlers and adults. But most of us don't know what breastfeeding is supposed to look like, because we never really see it. And if we do see it, we don't really look, because, eww, boobs.

All of which makes me realise that the more people breastfeed, particularly in public, the better. If breastfeeding is seen as being a perfectly normal thing to do, more people will be inclined to try it, or at least consider it.

Edam - for me it was because

1. I had such a terrible time with ds1 - I found it really hard (I know everyone does, I was in tears at every feed and was becoming really unhappy and in danger of spiraling into depression

2. I honestly don't believe that I am putting my children at any risk whatsoever from bottle feeding. Of course, as bf is the natural way it's meant to be done, it is 'better' but I don't think they are actually suffering in any way shape or form from formula

I managed to avoid depression which is hugely positive because I was suffering panic attacks and anxiety in the run up to ds3's birth as it was and I know that the stress of trying to bf would have made it 100x worse.

If I was truly convinced that it would make any sort of difference to the health and wellbeing of my children, of course I would put up with the pain, trauma and depression that I suffered first time round, but I'm not.

Like I said earlier - I know people have published risks etc associated with bottle feeding but I don't buy them (based on my own experience and that of family and friends) just as I don't buy published evidence that MMR is linked to autism and therefore I had my children vaccinated and just as there are risks to taking antibiotics, the chances are you will suffer no detriment so I use them if I need to.

Well! It's good to come back and to see that some coherent and considered opinions are being offered from both sides!
(Interesting how there seemed to be a hardcore of hysterical aggressive people who felt the need to remind themselves and everyone else over and over and over that they bottlefeed/bottlefed and didn't feel the slightest bit of remorse about it.
If they were/are so sure, why the need for constant reiteration? Just a thought......)

Message withdrawn

buka - or should that read fuka go away

oh buka, now i know you're trying just to shitstir!

BTW Gobbledigook, there IS no published evidence linking MMR to Autism.

I haven't read all the post's but I'm bothered by the title of this thread.

I'm a younger mum and I DID breastfeed - and I know several other younger mums who did / are breastfeeding.

I also know several older mums who won'tdon'tdidn't breastfeed.

I hate the sterotypical brackets that are put around mothers just because they are under 20/25 whatever!!!!