bf in the news again, for increasing intelligence

[robinredbreast]

so far its been on bbc1
radio 1
yahoo homepage

three cheers for breast feeding

also i thought alison baum who was interview on bbc1 put the message across so well, so tactfully done

well done alison,ive already signed your bf manifesto

"try to resist any note of criticism" Except just saying something positive is often deemed as criticising mothers who did not breastfeed. Ditto for "not appearing smug". If you say anything positive about your experience you are likely to get leapt on for making someone feel guilty

anyway, I'll go now...

tiktok, thats all well and good, but if I was to post that I fed my child on a diet consisting of nothing but ready meals and fruit shotos, but supplemented with vitamins because then it was adequate, because I didnt think cooking a decent meal was 'for me' yet hadnt even tried it, I would get jumped on for it.
So why can the same not be said about breastfeeding??

Please tell me you're not comparing formula with ready meals and fruit shoots.

No hunker, I'm not, I'm comparing the difference between what it is deemed ok to post.

MamaMammalon I agree with VictorianSqualor about it not necassarily being such a dreadful situation that a baby doesn't get milk for it's first 30 hours (obviously I am only talking about healthy babies here). My daughter was happy to go more than 25 hours without a drop. She made up for it that night though!

VictorianSqualor, but it's not the same!!

Of course if you posted that you gave your kid a diet of E numbers and were happy with that, you'd expect some dissenting voices.

But when we are talking about babies whose very relationship with their mothers is tied up with the feeding, and whose mothers planned to do something (breastfeed) and then it all went to s**t (for whatever reason), I think it's reasonable to expect kindness and tact along with the perfectly justifiable expression and description of the way bf is great, normal, supports the best health outcomes and so on.

Lol at cheesestrings. What if I BF my child while eating nothing but cheese-strings myself, MOTM? Is that ok?

More seriously, what upsets me about this research (and other studies like it) is that it is always a cause for blame, not celebration. We shouldn't be using these studies as yet another stick to beat women with, can't we just celebrate the fact that our bodies are even more marvellous than we knew?

Tiktok, I said that I have tons of sympathy for the mothers who plan to breastfeed but then cant, I was distraught at not being able to feed my DD, but as I also said, I tried, and that is what I think is the most important.
It's the defeatest attitudes before it has even been tried that I think need changing.

yeah i find it v hard to understand why someone wouldnt really give it a try, i can totally understand if they try and find it too much/too difficult and switch
but to not even try once?
can anyone help me to understand this?
[genuine question]

robin - i was in n. ireland weekend just gone visiting MIL. Before bfeeding in front of her, I asked whether she minded and she kindly said not. But when Bfeeding, she asked whether I really thought bfeeding was best for my LO - to which i responded yes. And she told me that she knew of no others who had bfed their LO's - formula was still the majority rule amongst her friends daughters - and views were that bfeeding was no better than formula and it was just more 'scientific evidence' that would be proven wrong. I didnt try and argue my case.

I also have friends who have known up front that they are not going to bfeed, reasons include;

• partners not wanting them too

- being grossed out by it - wanting their bodies back after pregnancy.

Each to their own I say - I am not fussed what method anyone chooses.

I agree defeatist attitudes need changing, VictorianSqualor.

But they won't change without the kindness and tact I am asking for.

I didnt want to breastfeed at all, it was something I ever wanted to do. Neither me or my 3 kids have missed out by me not breastfeeding. Having a baby chomping down on my boobs was not something I ever wanted to do, and all that flopping my knockers out in public was a definite no no. I have never felt guilty or inadequate for bottle feeding. It was mine and my partners choice.

Who knows in 15 years time this crackpot society will class formula feeding as child abuse. Until that time lets live and let live, I'm sure all those formula fed babies get by on their inferior IQ's!

when my bf had her ds she tried to bf him, and failed, mainly down to lack of support. she went through 10 weeks of hell, an unhappy, un satisfied baby who settled when he was put onto formula. when she had her dd, she put her straight onto formula and had a contented, happy baby from the off. which experience is she likely to want to repeat again with no3? (due in 2 weeks) just another reason why someone might not want to bf.

not exactly constructive, 12lbs. "flopping your knockers out in public." thanks for that.

Yes, kindness and tact work both ways, imo.

i think intelligence is over rated

Urban I wasnt trying to be constructive, my knockers would have flopped out they were enormous.

another one here for the bfing combined with jars and (gasp) freezer food.

I have no doubt contaminated my sons' potential genius. Sigh.

agree totally with tik tok.

as a first time mum, am amazed at the reactions on some debates.

bf and ff
sahm and working mums
alcohol during pregnancy.

why are others so fussed about what choices everyone else makes with their children???
agree that more support is needed to assist those who want to bfeed, but people will continue to make the choices that work for them and their lifesstyles.

rrb, re. not trying to bf, past traumatic feeding experiences are clearly going to be relevant. Then there are the cultural/social reasons. If no one in your family or social circle is ever seen bfing and you are going to be seen as some sort of weird revolutionary for doing it, you're clearly less likely to do it.

Let us not judge lest we be judged eh??

i know you weren't trying to be constructive, that much was obvious. but how would you have felt if i'd come on and said, "I didn't fancy formula feeding, it just was never going to be an option for me. I didn't fancy feeding my child hyrdolyzed protein, and I hated the thought of shoving a silicone teat in its mouth in public."

but of course, if i said that, i'd be jumped on for being insensitive to ff-ing mothers, which would be absolutely true.

Hmmmmm, on reading 12lbs' post, I think I'll add another bit to the list of 'rules':

• if you formula fed and are happy about it, use kindness and tact when talking about breastfeeding, being aware that derogatory descriptions of what it involves make you sound bone-headed and rude

not judging dg
just asking a genuine question
is that ok?

My DH who hasn't been very supportive of my BFeeding my now 10-month old DD surprised me by saying "It's worded the wrong way round really. It should say that not BF your child might lower their IQ by a maximum of 7 points".