Mighty oaks from little acorns grow - slow weight gain support thread

[FireworksScareMossyPets]

Thread for those of us whose los are:

• Healthy
• Meeting developmental milestones
• Producing plenty of soaking wet nappies
• Producing several pooey nappies (quantity varies after first six weeks or so)
• Gaining weight...

but just much more slowly than the centile charts tell us they should.

This is a thread for help, support and understanding from other Mums who have "been there, done that".

It's where we can share links, share our stories and what if anything we have done to help our lo's weight gain - or whether we've just ditched the scales and looked at the baby.

However, we also don't want to lull other Mums into a false sense of security; if your lo is not meeting the criteria at the top then it is best to get help from a breastfeeding counsellor (or general infant feeding specialist - not all slow gaining babies are breastfed) or supportive health care professional.

Mossy xx

ooh I like the idea of appraisals lol

Yeah appraisals would be fantastic I know what I would write on them. I cant wait till next weigh in lol I just want to see how they will plot her weight on the chart it doesnt go low enough at 13 months to plot her unless she decides to eat kfc and mc d's everyday along with her cheese and mayo sandwich .

I am evil cos I have an image in my head of one of them flapping ooh what will we do we cant put a dot on the page

got weighed today and hasnt put on any weight, she is 16wks and 9lb 14oz had few static weeks now and am now gonna start supplementing, wish i could use ebm but with a 3yr old to look after as well im finding it impossible to express. people keep telling me aptamil is best formula but we're veggie and its got fish oil in. do you think others are as good or am i just looking for something else to worry about?
think i might ditch domperidone and try one of the herbal ones!

We use Aptamil. Didn't know it had fish oil in it, why is that then I wonder? Can't be an essential ingredient if the others don't have it in so wonder what it's for?

Most of them do have fish oil in (a good source of omega 3 and 6 fatty acids), for example SMA does (thats what I use). These are fatty acids the body can't make itself and are essential for brain development. This is more important if you are 100% FF in my opinion. Breastmilk of course has everything your baby needs so it doesnt really matter which formula you use if you are mix feeding IMO.

If this issue is important to you, you could always try pumping on one side while you feed on the other. This is good for your supply too.

I wish I had had this thread a year ago. It would have been so good to know I wasn't the only one with these worries.

My DS, now aged 14 months, was born at full term on the 9th centile, and dropped to the 2nd centile when he was 12 weeks old. I was exclusively breastfeeding and felt under so much pressure to top up with formula (had many emotional rows with my mum on the subject!).

In the end I did start topping up feeds with formula when DS was aged 4 months, and it made no difference to his weight gain. Even now, he is still on the 2nd centile, despite 3 meals a day and a pint of cow's milk. He enjoys his food but just doesn't eat huge portions.

Anyway, my reason for posting is to hopefully offer a bit of encouragement. I worried so much about DS's weight gain, and felt like a dreadful mother who wasn't providing enough milk - especially when all his friends (who were mainly or wholly breastfed) seemed to be piling on the pounds by the minute. Now I realise he is just a small boy with a small appetite, but he's healthy and happy, and that's what matters.

Well, the latest weigh in was good, he's put 4oz on in 2 weeks and is now 13lb 11 and a half oz at 30wks. Not a lot but he's gradually following the bottom line. It was the nice hv today, she said he's just a dinky little man and is very active and she thinks he's totally fine. Said I could wait a month before getting him weighed again if I want as he seems to be doing well. I said i'd probably go back in 3 weeks as I like to know and can't help myself! I told her I was waiting for an appointment from the baby doc, she said it was best to see him anyway but she suspects no problems with him. So that made me feel a lot more relaxed about the whole thing.

Thanks MrsWB - it is great to hear it from the POV of someone who has been through something similar. I also have had so much pressure from my mum I don't want to go and visit her anymore it just makes me feel so guilty. Esp when comparing him to other babies - I know I shouldn't but I just can't help it.

Dalrymps congrats on the weight gain - thats fab for a baby of that age. Know what you mean about wanting to get him weighed frequently ...

lol sallyforth I only don't own baby scales because I couldn't find any!

Well done Dalrymps!

Someone called my dd chubby today - I am so proud!!

Oh yeah, our neighbour said about ds the other day 'he's getting big', wow, that's just what I wanted to hear , much better than people guessing he's 4 months old when he's 7 months old !

I know, dd is 6mths almost and people do a double take! i never say "almost 6mths" at the moment though, it's always 5 and a half!

I know, so annoying how people look at you like they don't believe you or something when you say how old lo is [anrgy]

i know what people mean aboput comparing- ds4 (8 weeks on monday) has a very chubby 6 month old cousin..... you can imagine!

but my other 3 were all the same as ds4 weight wise- ie slow to gain. surely there'd be concern if ds4 took after the family of my bil rather than dh? lol

doesn't stop it hurting though, ds4 is weighed in front of baby group and i hate that; the only other bf baby is humungous length wise as well

mind haven't had anyone ask me how many days old he is this week- and he's in -3 now lengthwise if not weight wise

I think weight gain is so emotive because it is linked to food, which is so bound up in nurturing/loving our DCs. I think it was Joan Rivers (or maybe Ruby Wax) who described her own way of demonstrating love to her DCs as "I love you, eat" so if your child does not gain much weight, it suggests to some ignoramus that they are not well fed, and therefore not loved.

In truth they are probably better fed, and possible better loved, than many large babies who are piling on the pounds due to an inappropriate diet.

I know I will now get angry posts saying "my child is on 91st centile and was exclusively BF until the age of 18". Great. I don't mean you, do I?

Hi all, Callum is now a HUGE 14lb 11oz at 8 months old, yes he is still small for 8 months and still wears 0-3 clothes but compared to what he was he is doing well. People look me at like when I say he is 8 months but then you get the odd person who says 'ooooooo he is big???!!!' do they need glasses?? lol

Glad all the little ones are doing well Sparkly thats huge im ..... next challenge we face is going to be the shoes, how on earth will i find any to fit her as she is starting to take the odd step between furniture etc and can quite happily push herself up from the floor/toy box and stand unaided. We need the shoes to fit her and her foot length is less than 10 cm so something like a us size 3 or uk size 1 anyone know were to get them besides little squeakers from the internet? I would prefare to see how they fit before buying them. She is 1yr and 3 weeks old today

hello, new to mumsnet but reading all this wish I'd joined earlier! My daughter is 16 months old & very small for her age. I constantly get gasps from people when I say how old she is. (doesn't help that she hasn't got much hair!).

Her weight gain plateaued at around 6m, and went from near the 50th centile to off the scale. We've seen HVs, dieticians, paediatricians, had blood tests, sweat tests for cystic fybrosis (results due back this week but doctor says it's highly unlikely that's what it is), seen speech & lang therapists in case it's something to do with her mouth, but so far the only explanation they can come up with is that she's a fussy eater.

They've had me so worried but in my head I always thought that's all it was - fussiness. She is on a high calorie powder and is thankfully gaining weight and slowly creeping up to where she should be, but I don't really want to give her this high calorie stuff indefinitely! She seems happy and healthy and is always busy and active, and I'm quite small so I'm sure she's fine but she doesn't eat much and has quite a limited diet.

Soremummy we've had the same prob with shoes - she's been walking for 4 months & her feet were just too small & the woman at clarks kept sending us away! We just had to keep her in the soft leather ones. Finally a few weeks back she had her first pair - bless, but her feet are narrow so the choice was very limited!

migola got her measured yesterday and can't get any shoes she also has narrow feet and we need a D fitting all the shes in clarks start at an E im on the internet now searching so anyone out there know where I can get size 1.5 D fitting walking shoes??? Reward offered

Hi everyone,

Thought you'd like a little update on how our little biscuit is getting on. Two weeks ago, she was just under 11lbs (10lb 15oz) - and that weekend she started on solids at 25 1/2 weeks. We were holding out for a perfect 26 weeks but had been offering her food to play with to get her used to it, and she demolished a stick of cooked carrot, so we took that as a good a sign of any that she was ready, and started offering her lots of goodies.

Well, to say she has taken to eating would be a mild understatement. She has heartily munched away on anything in-front of her, and also taken to the pureed stuff we've offered too - so much so that now, two-weeks later, she's on 3 meals a day (plus desert sometimes) in addition to her 7+ milk feeds!

Still, we were cautiously optimistic when we took her to be weighed today - we didn't want to get our hopes up (having had them dashed plenty of times before) - but she surprised us again by putting on a WHOPPING 1lb 8oz in TWO WEEKS!!

She's now 12lb 7oz - and has actually jumped back on to the 0.4th centile for the first time since about 8 weeks! Hurrah!

I'd like to echo to the worlds of verylittlecarrot earlier on on this thread (words, infact which kept us going when it was really hard) - we are so glad that we held out till 6 months without giving in and starting solids early, as seeing DD grab a spoon and feed herself and the way she has enjoyed eating all manner of things have really made up for the stress and hard times of the previous couple of months - the weight gain is pretty impressive too, though it does bother me slightly that it took the extra calories to bring it along, but that's one for a new thread, I think.

Hope everyone else and their LOs are doing well too!

FANTASTIC!!!!! v pleased for you and hoping things go the same way in this household!!

Come and join in here for carrot stick chat etc!

im hoping my dd will start to gain weight when she goes onto solids too. dd1 was slow weight gain even with top ups, but after solids at 6mnth started to jump through the centiles!
dd2 has just gained 8oz in a fortnite so at 18wks is 10ib 6 oz! im taking domperidone which i felt boosted my supply but dont think she drank any more as weight gain became static, so on advice we have been doin top ups of formula during the fortnite, she tends to refuse them in the day which i found reasuring as must mean shes not starvin! but she takes 2-3oz after bf at bed time. shes also started sleepin through til bout 5am! i have mixed feelins....happy she has gained some weight and that ive had some much needed sleep, but unhappy at use of formula. when i read stuff on here i keep thinkin i could have tried harder but i think i was /am gettin so stressed about it that i was not able to give dd1 time and everyone was unhappy. tryin to b positive tho, only got to 6wks exclusive bf dd1 before usin formula but managed 16wks this time just wish i could be one of those mums who bf with no probs, but dont we all!

ILD im a little at your little biscuit

Well we had the dreaded weigh in today... and instead of her usual average of 2.5 oz in 3 or 4 weeks this time she gained in 4 weeks a WHOLE 8.5oz .

VLC I printed and plotted the who chart and she sits nicely just barely below the lowest line took this with me and showed my friends at the clinic and left them debating how up to date their charts are and she just managed to fit on their chart for 13mths old but asked me would I mind keeping the who one so we could compare lol.

soremummy, well I wouldn't be too as our LO has gone on hunger strike for the last couple of days due to, what we think is, teething. She's having plenty of milk but if it's isn't fruit puree, she's not interested at the moment! So I doubt the next weigh-in will be as stellar!

Hi everyone,

I also have a tiny weeny little DD who has dropped down the centiles. She is currently 12.3lbs at 23 weeks.
(I've posted before about this under the name BWMum, but have just decided that is incredibly boring so changed it!)

We've had the whole "top her up with formula" advice. We've been to the GP. We're off to the paediatrician on Friday.

Yesterday DD got hold of a (raw!) carrot off DH's plate and munched it, evidence turned up in the nappy this am. She also cries every time we eat until we give her some to play with - although we've been careful to make sure she doesn't eat it. So, I wondered whether she might be ready to start solids and thought I'd ask the HV. BIG MISTAKE!!!!

We've just got back and my ears are still ringing with "you must have poor milk supply", "affecting DD's brain development", "if she had lost any more I'd insist you topped her up". I'm so cross I'm practically in tears. I have spent literally DAYS thinking about her weight gain and whether my decision to BF exclusively is doing her harm, whether I'm endangering her health just for a point of principle. I've read everything I can, I've lain awake thinking about this. There we go - now I am actually in tears. Damn woman!! DD was lying on the mat in front of her chatting away, waving her arms and legs, rolling over and trying to catch the HV's eye - and she just spent the whole time looking at the BLOODY chart. I only wanted to ask about weaning, I didn't want the whole weight gain debate again. I certainly don't think she should tell me I have poor milk supply without actually checking that is the case. And the final message was - "definitely start weaning her, poor child must be starving." She is not starving, although she might be ready for solids. Basically I'm no further forward on the question I wanted asked and I'm back to feeling guilty, upset, angry, confused etc etc about the damn weight gain issue.

Sorry, that's such a rant - especially for a first post! But I really am so upset and had to "talk" somewhere with people who've been there with this.

Hadeda

Just wanted to say that we've been there - but we are a few weeks ahead of you (and your DD was bigger than ours at 23 weeks). Our DD is developmentally where she should be, alert and happy - despite both (of our) mothers telling us she was "starving" . The fact is, breastmilk is more calorific than solids and if she's fed on demand then there is no way she is going without.

We held out giving her solids till just about 26 weeks (well, 25.5) and we were lucky because DD has taken to solids really well, but I believe that there is a feeling that if babies are developed enough to pick up food and eat it, then that is a fairly good indicator that their guts are mature enough to deal with it. Hope that helps.

In our experience seeing the paed was a positive thing, as he looked at the whole picture, rather than the growth chart, and was able to reassure us that DD was doing just fine - wish more HV would do the same...