I was in an article in a National Paper about breastfeeding in public, this is a letter I received to my home address?..what do you make of it? Scary, bonkers, laughable or charming?

[TheGodmother]

For obvious reasons have changed my name, but how would you feel getting this letter. I assume he found my address by googling my name and location. He also gave his name and address which I haven't googled, too scared in case he is some kind of nut!! Anyway here it is

Dear TheGodmother

I read with great interest about the article regarding breastfeeding. My views are quite liberal. When the subject comes up, I often ask if anyone is offended by seeing a cow milked by a farmer. The answer is no, the only difference is the "animal" that produces it.

The he goes on a couple of paragraphs about woman wearing short skirts and would much rather see a woman feeding a baby, so that the baby get the goodness he needs from milk.

Then he goes on to say - If I get sexually aroused about by seeing breasts in public, then it?s my problem and not the problem of the woman concerned.

As a man I could easily have took advantage of the situation like some pervert and say something like....

I just watch breastfeeding woman and stare and enjoy the site. It's like a cross between page 3 and watching Carry on film. Sometimes I take pictures and after I have started about 5 mins, I start to have a stiff down below, I take advantage of this by putting my hands in my pocket and then I adjust my...

..but I'm not that sort of person. I respect the beliefs of other people. I am glad that you are no longer shy to breastfeed in public.

Thanks for reading this letter and I wish you luck in the future

I'm still for the send-a-big-bloke-to-the-pervy-bully's-house. But then again, I don't come from a very nice area!!!

That's so wierd. it would freak me out. Definitely report it to the police.

He's a perv

It's the postal equivalent of heavy breathing on the phone

Defintely police - today. Not informally, formally. He's disgusting and a potential threat to women and children. What sort of man writes about his sexual arousal to a stranger?

I think you should also let the local paper know - formally, not informally.

He may be harmless, though actually, I don't think receiving a letter like this is actually harmless....but he may not be. The next woman who gets a horrible letter may be a lot less resiliant than you.

I was in our local paper campaigning about a school crossing and I got a series of disgustingly violent phone calls. They stopped after about three weeks but they upset me a lot at the time.

Sorry, Godmother, I realise the paper was national.

They definitely need to know as well. Tell the reporter you spoke to.

BLOODY WEIRDO! WHAT A NUTTER!

Horrid horrid little man... defo report to paper and cops.

Bloody HELL I have honestly NEVER considered that someone might be sexually excited by public breastfeeding

how extraordinary (and how naive of me)

I think I would report it

receiving a letter which you find worrying or sexually harrassing is probably something to get on record, just in case

Personally I wouldn't share this information with the reporter as they may use it for a story
but I would certainly pass it on to the police as this perv does have your home address

Oh what a sheltered life you lead F&Z Have you never come across those pervy men who dress up as babies and pay bf women to feed them milk from their breasts?

There's a whole world of loonies out there...

When I say have you ever come across them, obv I don't mean literally! (I mean in magazines etc.)

VSS oh yes, and I know there are videos

I just hadn't connected that they might also be turned on by the sight of me breastfeeding my baby

sounds stupid now I say it, but I hadn't

That letter is outrageous.

The worrying thing isn't just that he thinks like that, but that he thinks it's ok to track you down and put his bizzare thoughts in a letter to you.

Police. No hesitation.

I agree with everyone else, you should send it along to the police. You don't need to ask them to take action if you don't want to, but it may be just what they need if he's been harrassing other people too. I think that you should let the paper know, but agree that they might want to cook it up into a story, so would perhaps be wary. Why not discuss courses of action wit your police relatives. Definately creepy - I'm so glad you have moved house.

I think you should contact the police because he suggests a situation by saying 'Sometimes I take pictures'. If a mum posted on MN to say someone was taking pics of her b-feeding we'd all be justifiably outraged at that.

You should definitely go to the police. What sort of person risks writing something like that which can so obviously offend someone? He's either insane or a pervert, cos he must know what sort of reaction that would get, so either way it's not nice.

This issue of pictures in public is a fascinating one. I think we have a right in the street to use a camera phone or camera to photograph. Apparently in that case over the judge who was alleged to have flashed on the tube, the articles relating to that say these things increase in summer and quite a few men on the London underground do aim to get behind women in short shirts on the up escalator to get pictures under her skirt.

I wonder what we can or should be allowed to photograph? Should we say no one can take a picture of anyone without their permission for example? We'd probably have newspapers without photos at all if that were the law. If someone is aroused by seeing a man reading the paper or at the sight of a woman's forearm should we ban them from taking the picture because of what is in their head or mind. If we think breastfeeding is a normal function then photographing the woman should have the same rules applied as if someone in a public park took photos of the 10 families sitting having a picnic there. Given the availability of camera phones etc these days we could perhaps do with a shake up and consultation on what the law ought to say.

I've no idea what the law says about 'public' photos, tbh, but istr that when a man was seen taking pics of children on a beach in Portugal (pertaining to a news story to which I've not contributed) he was chased away by outraged people. It's a vexed question - where is the line drawn?

What a strange man, definitely sounds like someone trying to put you of public BF, do you think it is actually someone being serious or just trying to be 'funny'?

I would think he will have found your address via 192.com which gives details from the electoral roll. (I used to work in a college and was a bit scared when a weird student came up to me and quoted me my address etc. I reported it and found out how he got the information)

It is lucky you have moved house. I would definitely report it to the police and also mention it to the journalist who wrote the article.

Definately a pervert who is trying to humiliate you.

He may be on the sex offenders register already.

Definately report it to the police.

What did you decide to do Thegodmother? I have to say I fed Dd twice in public today and both times I did feel a little more exposed after hearing about your horrible letter. It won't make me stop breastfeeding in public but the idea that there could be someone out there watching and getting turned on makes me feel very uncomfortable.

It's a very interesting question indeed. The Governmetn last summer said don't worry it's fine to take photos at school sports days - the data protection act won't stop you and people shouldn't be so worried about the law. I tend from politeness to ask people first but that isn't the law. If you are in a public place pictures can be taken and of course if you';re like me and think breastfeeding is beautiful then a photo is presumably fine. Look at all the oil paintings of it. It's one of the most beautiful sights known to man.

On the other hand there are many sex web sites devoted to lactation and plenty of men and their willing women who enjoy it sexually.

Bit like pictures of our children naked on beaches which I think look beautiful but in the minds of some others they would be aroused by them, yet the picture is the same.

Just like we go to an underwear catalogue to choose knickers and a teenage boy takes the same material and certainly isn't using it to buy his mother's birthday present.

Haven't read the whole thread but ewwww. Think it's worth mentioning it to the newspaper you were in, as in future articles on such, interviewees might prefer to be just first name or something. No one should have to be embarrased on breastfeeding, but if you've got an unusual enough name to be personally googled it's probably as well to be careful (I'm ex directory because there were 4 people with my name in the LONDON phone book when I moved in here, and two were my aunt (the same one) at her current address and one she moved out of at least 10 years previously.

Good point and I think the technology is just about developed to enable image searching on search engines which will be fascinating when it's there. My children searching google earth to check out the back gardens / houses of their friends (one boy claimed to have a pool when he didn't and google earth was his undoing) just shows who technology has moved beyond the law. We always had a right to hire a plane and fly it over a place and take pictures but most of us couldn't afford it whereas a few clicks on google earth and there you are in some areas.

wow, nice kids