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Breastfeeding in public your thoughts?

104 replies

Yazza123 · 16/03/2018 16:33

So I strictly breastfeed which has its pros and cons. One con is definitely when I am out with my 3 month old who insist that she will only have the boob it is hard to locate a breastfeeding friendly room nearby so what do you do when you are out and there is no feeding rooms nearby? I know there are discreet covers you can use in public places but is there anybody who openly breastfeeds in public? Surely it’s 2018 breastfeeding should not be an issue to do in public but nearby cafes and shops should have rooms for bf mums.

OP posts:
Jon66 · 16/03/2018 18:07

Who said breastfeeding in public is a problem. It isn't, we've got past that stage thank god. This is a bit of a non thread.

bobstersmum · 16/03/2018 18:16

To be honest I think the cover things draw attention to what you are doing! I am bfing for the second time and I feed wherever I need to, no one has ever given me a second glance or realised what I was doing. If you wear a vest top under a normal loose top you can pull the top up and vest down and pop baby on, there is nothing to see, baby's head covers what little flesh is out. It just looks like cuddling baby.
My dh is squirmy about it though even so, in subway the other day baby wanted a feed and he said are you going to take her into the loo to do it!! I gave him such a look and said no, why don't you go and eat your food in the loo!

FlaviaAlbia · 16/03/2018 18:23

There's a public health campaign going on in NI at the minute under #NotSorryMums with lots of posters and adverts saying women never have to apologise for feeding in public.

It's pretty fantastic that it is so widespread, it's on billboards and bus stops and the like.

I fed DS everywhere using the two top and scarf method. The staff in my favourite coffee shop used to bring me over drinks if I'd finished mine and my hands were full Smile

MoseShrute · 16/03/2018 18:26

This reply has been deleted

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AlecOrAlonzo · 16/03/2018 18:32

Just wear a scarf rather than have a cover if you're bothered.

If you're on Facebook there's a group called Can I Breastfeed In It which is excellent for suggesting outfits and, more importantly, for normalising breastfeeding.

99.9% of people won't give you a second look. Breastfeeding isn't that big a deal.

The tiny minority who are sniffy about it can away and raffle themselves. Mostly it's just Internet people who care. In rl no one bothers.

ItsuAddict · 16/03/2018 18:45

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Tuckingfypo · 16/03/2018 18:50

I whip a tit out without shame.

With DD1 who was first baby, I was extremely shy and used something called a Bebe au lait (essentially an apron, we nicknamed it the titty tent)

With DD2 I honestly don't care if someone sees me. Even though my boobs are huge I feel I manage to feed discreetly and manage not to flash too much skin. If anyone said anything to me I'd turn my tit on them and squirt them in the face Wink

smileygrapefruit · 16/03/2018 18:54

Now I'm a seasoned pro (breastfeeding dc3) I will happily feed in any public place but I do remember how scared/nervous I was with dc1.

MummyCuddlesSolveEverything · 16/03/2018 21:15

I feed ds whenever and wherever I need to. The only person who ever has reacted/seems uncomfortable is my dad but he wouldn't dare say anything. No one has ever said anything negative, in fact I've had people offer to get me glasses of water/ask if I need anything.
I've never used one of the separate breastfeeding rooms, and although I've never tired ds would hate a cover.

As for cafes having breastfeeding rooms, ds needing feeding was the perfect excuse to stop for cake, and being out the house around other people, not sat separate to them.

Yazza123 · 16/03/2018 21:22

These stories are real confidence boosters I’m surely going to try wearing easier to open tops/shirts and keep a shawl just in case.

I’m not saying every cafe should have a bf room but surely a few local ones should have separate rooms for breastfeeders just to do it in comfort it’s a USP for them too :)

OP posts:
Cheekyandfreaky · 16/03/2018 21:26

@Yazza123 I don’t agree, I think bf’ing openly is a feminist act but that might just be me.

CoolGirlsNeverGetAngry · 16/03/2018 21:35

Yes!! I’d never thought of that before.
Op, I completely understand but honestly after the first few times trying to feed under a scarf I decided it was easier just to crack on without it.

CherryCi · 16/03/2018 21:43

I’m not saying every cafe should have a bf room but surely a few local ones should have separate rooms for breastfeeders just to do it in comfort it’s a USP for them too :)

Local cafes are likely to be independent cafes, where floor space for tables is essential to their often very tight profit margin. To provide a separate room for the occasional bfeeding Mum would be counterproductive.

And it’s not a “USP” when a large amount of mums have no problem feeding in the cafe itself. Cafes can also apply for a “breastfeeding welcome here” sticker for the window.

SoftSheen · 16/03/2018 21:44

I breastfed my two babies in public thousands of times, in a range of different places, and never had a single negative comment. In fact, most of the time I don't think people even noticed.

You don't need a breastfeeding cover. Wearing a stretchy vest (that can be pulled down under the breast) makes it easy to breastfeed discreetly wearing most tops. A strategically placed muslin can also help, especially during the early days when it might take a few goes to get the baby latched on properly.

Cheekyandfreaky · 16/03/2018 21:49

@CoolGirlsNeverGetAngry definitely. To be honest embracing what women’s bodies can do are almost the most feminist things you can do these days.

Lilymossflower · 16/03/2018 22:15

I breastfeed openly in public
If I ever rarely have a moment of thinking 'oh my boob is a bit exposed today' I remember the socialised boob's in magazines, billboards, etc, and think we'll if that's bloody acceptable then so am I.

TBH no one has ever commented either

BuzzKillington · 16/03/2018 22:18

Really? I thought we'd gone beyond this and covers? No way.

I haven't bf for 12 years, but I did it anywhere and everywhere. Never had a single comment.

Doilooklikeatourist · 16/03/2018 22:24

Holy cow. I fed both my babies and never had a special apron or looked for a breastfeeding room
Just wear a loose top and shove the baby underneath , or ( as I remember doing ) shrug a sarong over your swimsuit and feed the baby at the pool in Center parcs
My DC are now 23 and 20 and I thought these worries should be well gone

TheClacksAreDown · 16/03/2018 22:26

I tried using a cover for a bit when feeding a baby using a nipple shield. But found it more hassle than it was worth.

After that I went for the stretchy vest that goes down and top that goes up. Primark do acceptable ones that are very cheap. I bought a range and where possible I wore in a similar colour to the top which made it even less noticeable.

MrsWhirly · 16/03/2018 22:27

I breast fed both my kids in public all the time. Dress appropriately I.e shirts and feeding bra’s. Wear a loose scarf or carry large Muslim cloth to throw over, and I really don’t see what the issue is. I never felt I had to rush off and find a special room.

Personally I never got the girls out in full view, I don’t feel comfortable showing that much skin in public.

endofthelinefinally · 16/03/2018 22:29

I breast fed in public 30 years ago with no problems whatsoever.

ewemum · 16/03/2018 22:32

Have breast fed all 3 of mine and still feeding 9 month old. Only once have I used a dedicated room and hated it, I think I felt a bit lonely. Have fed on benches at the shopping centre, in the bank, cafes, ringside at the livestock market, ploughing match..etc. As other have said a stretchy vest top underneath your top that you can pull down is best.
The only time I ever felt awkward was out with my sister in a small cafe, I needed to feed DC1 and was happily and discreetly sorting myself out, but my sister had to make such a fuss about making sure I was covering up with a cloth , that everyone started starring.

afrikat · 16/03/2018 22:32

I've fed 2 babies for 3.5 years altogether and fed them anywhere and everywhere, with various levels of cover. I usually do one up one down so you don't see much. In summer I wear wrap dresses so more boob is on show. It's never occurred to me to care what anyone else thinks, if my baby wants feeding they get fed. I've never had a negative comment

StylishDuck · 16/03/2018 22:34

I have to say I am loving all these lovely positive stories of kindness that strangers have shown all of you when you've been feeding. From offering to get drinks to giving up tables and just those little words of encouragement. I'm BFing my 9 week old just now and I'm trying to be as open as possible with my 3yo DD about it. I love it when she tells people that mummy's boobs have milk in them for her little brother and when she "feeds" her stuffed toys by pulling her top up. It's all about normalising it. It is the most natural thing in the world and yet there is still people who question whether it's appropriate in public. It's so heartwarming to hear all these stories.

GothMummy · 16/03/2018 22:44

My children are 12 and 6 now but I fed them anywhere and everywhere. I never had any problems, but sometimes nice people would bring me water in cafes.

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