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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Down about formula top ups. Is there a way back to fill bf?

110 replies

Jellybabie3 · 15/10/2017 00:08

So my DS is 7 days old. He lost 13% body weight after birth which was thought to be a result of a stressful birth (ended in c section) and me losing alot of blood so having low milk. He remained in hospital where we were forced to implement a feeding plan which involved bf, 45 min express and formula top up every 3 hours. Ds quickly put on weight and was discharged. He is now 8% underweight. Now we are home we really want to focus on bf. We are gutted we had to add formula. But my DS is such a hungry baby and i am feeding him all day and he is still hungry and agitated. I feel like a dairy cow, not a mum and he is still not full. We give him approx 70ml top up of formula before bed. Is there a way out of this? I am worried he will lose more weight and at the same time so so sad that i cant provide fully for him. I am also expressing a couple of times a day but this is usually only about 40ml.

Any help/advice? I really dont want DS to go off bf

OP posts:
Jellybabie3 · 19/10/2017 11:00

OK

OP posts:
Jellybabie3 · 19/10/2017 11:11

That said hes just woken right on queue at 2 hours for food. Its this night formula i need to shift - shouldve tried harder last night. Sigh.

OP posts:
Twofishfingers · 19/10/2017 11:20

OP, please stop beating yourself up because of this. You are doing great and your baby is putting on weight. Remember that you have had a difficult birth, a major surgery. You lost a lot of blood. Topping up with formula is absolutely fine, and try to not see this as a sign of failure, because it isn't. Carry on with what you are doing, give the occasional top up, carry on breastfeeding most of the time and in time your supply will stabilise. Giving one top up a day will not, I'm my experience, influence negatively your supply .

I had two emergency c sections and I understand just how difficult this is, and you are making the right decision. That's exactly what I did with my two boys and it was absolutely fine.

BertrandRussell · 19/10/2017 11:33

"That said hes just woken right on queue at 2 hours for food. Its this night formula i need to shift - shouldve tried harder last night. Sigh."

No you don't. You don't have to shift anything! He's doing well, putting on weight and sleeping as well as any 12 day old baby does (and better than many). Take a breath. Relax. Stop beating yourself up. And gaze at him. What's your favoutite bit? I was very keen on eyelids and the soft bit behind the ears.

MrsPestilence · 19/10/2017 12:37

Jelly you are doing great.

Do you have some nipple cream? Lansinoh or any calendula one. There is a phase when you will get sore, it passes quite quickly.

How are you recovering from the cesarean? Remember it will take a while.

Jellybabie3 · 19/10/2017 21:10

Thanks all. Hv was happy with DS progress but thinks the three of us are struggling with the trauma of the birth. She suggested baby massage for him and urged that for us sleeping is the key for him to be calmer as he can sense we are struggling Sad so i need to work that out. She wasn't worried about the formula nor the amount and told us to focus on surviving this tough phase before worrying about the future per se. Shes going to come back in 2 instead of 6 weeks to see how we are getting on. Did mention feeding groups but not sure how i would get there as i cant drive for another month and DH goes back to work monday (another thing i am worried about) weve found the past few days tough which makes me unbearably sad as this is his pat leave which should be a happy time and its been taken up with worry about feeding and DS weight. On the other hand i cant help but feel i am carrying alot of this alone as the feeding is largely my responsibility.

Btw bert DS has a tiny tuft of hair in the top of his ear which i adore. Looks like a little elf. And i chew his cheeks atleast a couple of times a day..Smile

OP posts:
sycamore54321 · 21/10/2017 03:59

Just seeing this response to my post now.

sycamore54321 in most of Asia there is a tradition of "confinement" where women are expected to rest, mostly in bed, for 30-40 days post-partum to build up milk supply and recovery from delivery.

A day in bed is not going to put anyone at risk of DVT, don't be ridiculous. I had a c-section under epidural and didn't get out of bed for 24 hours after having my daughter. "

Being immobile is EXACTLY what puts you at risk for DVT. And in the first six weeks after giving birth, a woman is twenty times more likely to get DVT than at other times in her life. It is really serious. Talking about confinement periods in Asia doesn't really add anything to the discussion unless you tell us the maternal mortality rate from pulmonary embolism and the morbidity rate from DVTs. Have you never seen the advice to wear compression socks on long-haul flights, even ones of six or seven hours? A period of several hours immobile is sufficient for life-threatening DVT. Telling a post-partum, post-surgery woman to stay under her baby day and night is a really risky thing to do.

I followed the cluster feeding advice - sit on the sofa and feed feed feed. I had zero other risk factors. I had life-threatening DVT, hospitalised in high-dependency medical ward (without my 20-day old baby, due to infection risk), six months of painful injections, two years of follow-up treatment, and lifelong health consequences. Because I followed the exact advice people are giving the OP (and I was lower risk than her, having not had a section) and nobody ever told me of the post-partum risk.

Scoff at it all you like but blood clots are in the top ten causes of maternal mortality.

Jellybabie3 · 21/10/2017 22:47

sycamore thanks for your post i will take it seriously. A family member of mine suffered with dvt so i am aware of how horrific it can be. I am keeping mobile, going for walks etc and even doing silly things like making the effort to change DS upstairs on the top changer rather than downstairs

OP posts:
Jellybabie3 · 22/10/2017 10:57

As way of an update....today we are waking up after our first night with no formula Smile he wouldnt go down til 2.15am but settled after a long (on/off for 2 hour) feed and 90ml ebm. Then woke at 6.30am, 8am (think he woke himself as only fed for about 5min) and 10.30am. Very proud of my little boy Grin

OP posts:
sycamore54321 · 23/10/2017 04:16

I'm glad you are finding a feeding pattern that works for you both OP and that you seem much happier than when you started the thread. Please remember formula is a wonderful, safe, nutritious food; you were entirely right to use it and it is entirely correct and right to use it again for any reason if you feel the need in the future. breastfed, combo-fed, formula-fed - the most important thing by far is "fed".

Best wishes.

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