Down about formula top ups. Is there a way back to fill bf?

[Jellybabie3]

So my DS is 7 days old. He lost 13% body weight after birth which was thought to be a result of a stressful birth (ended in c section) and me losing alot of blood so having low milk. He remained in hospital where we were forced to implement a feeding plan which involved bf, 45 min express and formula top up every 3 hours. Ds quickly put on weight and was discharged. He is now 8% underweight. Now we are home we really want to focus on bf. We are gutted we had to add formula. But my DS is such a hungry baby and i am feeding him all day and he is still hungry and agitated. I feel like a dairy cow, not a mum and he is still not full. We give him approx 70ml top up of formula before bed. Is there a way out of this? I am worried he will lose more weight and at the same time so so sad that i cant provide fully for him. I am also expressing a couple of times a day but this is usually only about 40ml.

Any help/advice? I really dont want DS to go off bf

I am in west berkshire. I'm so sad theres something wrong

This lactation consultant might be near you:
www.lcgb.org/location/lisa-mansour/

You could also call your midwife or health visitor team and ask about breastfeeding drop-ins near you. Where I live there is usually one every day.

Googled it and found a useful list here:
www.westberkshiremums.com/2017/breastfeeding-support-groups-in-west-berkshire

Even more info here:
www.royalberkshire.nhs.uk/Downloads/GPs/GP%20protocols%20and%20guidelines/Maternity%20Guidelines%20and%20Policies/STATIONERY/Infant%20feeding/BfN%20Reading%20and%20West%20Berks%20Breastfeeding%20support_260617.pdf

We had this too, and it was so stressful, which probably didn't help. Dd was born by emcs after a failed induction and dropped 13% of birth weight on day 3. We went back into hospital on a feeding plan, and it never felt very comfortable to me, felt like we were force feeding her. We carried on with the plan for about 6 weeks, but adapted it a little to suit us, so feeding on demand, not to schedule.
I stopped expressing at 8 weeks and then we started to reduce formula feeds and dd is still breastfed at 6 months, apart from 100ml of formula at bed time. I'm really pleased we continued with this, as it means that I can go ou for a couple of hours and know that she won't starve! She has also gone from just above 9th centile to above the 25th, so is thriving. She feeds fairly frequently in the day, but that's fine.
You will get different advice from everyone, but you are the mummy and will have an instinct about this and what's best for you.
I second those who've said don't stress and enjoy your little one.

@BertrandRussell and @user1472377586 have great advice. If baby is too sleepy to bf have you tried taking babies clothes off to wake them enough to feed. I was advised this and it worked wonders for me. Your body does wonderful things, trust it and it will fill your baby up. Baby will eventually learn that bottles are easier than mummy's boobie to drink from

OP someone below namechecked Lisa Mansour (think she’s based in Oxford where I am) - my friend knows her well and apparently she’s lovely and really helpful! I can try to contact her on your behalf or give contact details if you PM me

My mw is coming tomorrow do you think i should speak with them first? I also have hv visit thursday. DS seems to want comforting round the clock. He just cried i lifted him to breast and he took my nipple and fell asleep instantly, like hes using it as a pacifier. He fed about half hour ago so should be full. Literally overnight my breasts have doubled and started leaking. Do you think there is a chance that my milk is now at a better supply?? I have been trying to express but it looks like my pump is faulty as i can hand express but the pump collects nothing. I have just ordered a medela one which should be here by Friday. I am hoping i can express through the day after feeds to make up enough to fill his tummy and replace the formula before bed. No idea how to get round the comforting. Just seems to want to sleep on me or DH and any attempt to lift into his own bed means he wakes up within 5-10mins. Then he 'comfort feeds' and we repeat. Sorry, i just seem to panic at night.
Thank you hellbelle for sharing. Same story as me with emcs and 13% weight loss.

The not wanting to be put down is really common, unfortunately. If you haven't tried these already you could try: warming his cot with a hot water bottle before you put him down, use white noise, swaddle him or use a sleeping bag (if he's big enough), lay a muslin that smells of you as a sheet on the cot.

Are you able to feed lying down? If you can get the hang of it then you can co-sleep rather than have to hold him (check safe xo-sleeping guidelines before you do this).

OP read up on safe co-sleeping: we did it for the entire history of the human race until the idea came in that babies should be on cots.

Get a sling and hold baby in there if he’s not being fed. Sounds like your milk’s come in so try to enjoy just lying/sitting around feeding for the meantime, it won’t last forever.

OP, honestly -obviously I can't say that there's nothing wrong because I don't know, but it does sound horribly familiar. He is only 9 days old-practically not born yet! I really would suggest not expressing. I found expressing horribly stressful and upsetting. Just feed and feed and feed. Don't put him down- it almost always sorts itself out once the bio feedback mechanism is established. If giving formula gives you a bit of a break then do it. If it doesn't, then don't- just feed. One thing I found helpful was to say to myself "I will do this for one more day". That made it managable.

Ok thanks i may try one more night as mw is coming tomorrow. I know i am panicking but i feel so responsible for his weight loss. The time in hosp with the feeding plan was horrendous force feeding him. I feel like my whole time with him has been spent obsessing over feeding rather than enjoying him. I just love him so much.

With the pump I had the same issue - loads when I hand expressed but not a drop in pump. I eventually worked out I needed a much smaller flange size and that sorted it out.

OP DS1 was admitted for too much weight loss - turns out the HV had weighed him wrong!! They found out after a few hours, but not before they’d started talking about feeding plans etc. (Which I ignored, I also ignored the pump!). Just feed feed feed until the MW/HV come, like you say, it’s only one more night. Good luck!

Absolutely bizarre. DS has been feeding approx 2-3 hours but only for 20-25 mins a session (have been swapping breasts half way) spent the rest of the day asleep on me. Is it normal to go from one extreme to the other?

Yes, the frequent feeding is often a growth spurt where they want to up your milk supply. Once your milk supply increases then they can settle down and be more content, until the next growth spurt!

That's a brilliant sign, jelly. You're nearly there! One more day, yes?

I could honestly cry. If you guys are right.... 2 hours i can take!!

How are you today Jelly?

Hope it goes well with the midwife today.

Hi all. DS was a little gem yesterday sleeping on me all day but waking for feeds every 3 hours tops for 25mins using both sides. As soon as we went to bed at midnight he was wide awake and hungry hungry hungry. Bf for an hour swapping sides then gave 60ml formula. Didnt go down til 4.30am! Then up at 6.30 and 8.30 for feeds, the last one we used up the end of the formula. Now we are up he is fast asleep in his basket. is there any other tricks to get him down? We swaddled last night but that didnt work. Just seems to want to sleep in the day and be awake all night. Growing concerned as DH is back to work Monday. Mw rang and they have asked to go into GP as easier than waiting all day for drop in so will be first trip out since hosp

The issue is he wants to sleep on us. Going to try and get a ewan the dream sheep

Yes swaddle him, wake him up if he tries to fall asleep on the boob, put him down awake and swaddled with white noise and pat him to sleep in his crib. He will sleep longer and you can have a break.
This will only work if he is not hungry or cold

They don't know day from night at this age. Taking them out in the day for fresh air and light can help them begin to set their internal clock. They will want to feed at night because that's when your hormones are most effective for milk production.

I found I had to wait until baby was very asleep before attempting to transfer, very gently! Then I'd stay holding him for a while whilst in his cot until he was settled, then I'd try to disengage and leave. Both my sons absolutely would not be put down awake, no amount of patting would help - they'd be apoplectic within minutes.

I know this is easy for me to say, but honestly, at this stage it's better not to try to change anything. It almost certainly won't work and will just make you feel frustrated and as if you are doing something wrong. Just feed and sleep whenever you can. Eat and drink yourself. Don't try and do anything else. Rest if you can't sleep. He'll sort out night and day soon. You are doing BRILLIANTLY!