9% weight loss, nipples shredded, won't wake to feed. Can't do this again.

[wineapotamus]

I had a terrible time bfeeding my son. Now it's happening again with my 5 day old daughter. I just want to stop. Why can't I manage this? Midwife is coming again to weigh her on Monday but I can hardly wake her to feed and am so exhausted I'm worried I'm going to fall asleep feeding her tonight. She was up for 6 hours last night. I feel like I'm giving in to the panic. Oh god I need her to feed every 2 hours and sleep in between tonight.

[Sunshineandlaughter]

Hello if it was her supply then the baby would be lapping up formula - newborns aren't fussy how their milk comes!

[hellooooooomama]

I know Sunshine, I was just trying to get all bases covered for the OP, given what she said in her last post.

Personally I don't think there is a need for formula as baby isn't taking much, and if it's making baby unsettled it's just causing more problems.

[MsJuniper]

I met with the bf advisor three times (as well as multiple community midwives, HVs, doctors and a hospital consultants) who told me there was no problem before they referred me to a tongue tie clinic (at the Royal Free if you're in London) and they immediately identified and snipped. DS was very low weight by then so also had to top up but he reacted badly to the formula and we had to start him on prescription formula. He thrived after that.

Hope things improve for you OP x

[Sunshineandlaughter]

True hello. I'd go to GP and ask about reflux personally op. Hope things improve - please stop blaming yourself though!!

[wineapotamus]

She's not at all sick though. Only sometimes when she drinks formula when she's already full. And she doesn't seem dead distressed or in pain? She's just not eating enough. This morning she fed 5.30 ish, I woke her at 8, she had a long breast feed and wouldn't take any formula. she was awake and happy til 10.30 when she wanted food but was tired, then she had five mins tops off one side and passed out asleep. I need to wake her to try again but she cluster feeds so much in the evening that I do feel like she's on the boob quite a lot, just not at really regular intervals. Sigh. It's such a guessing game. She's a worry to her mother...

[Sunshineandlaughter]

Babies eat what they need as long as they are offered it. And you are offering it. Make sure you are offering food at least every 3 hours - maybe every 2 if she is small. Try every 2 hours if she's too tired to eat every 2.5.
You can have silent reflux or failure to gain weight can be a symptom of another underlying health problem. I would go to GP or midwives and ignore health visitors except for using them for weigh ins.

[AyeAmarok]

Did you get fluids via a drip during labour OP?

[wineapotamus]

Hmmm maybe. I had an elcs. Would I have?

[AyeAmarok]

I would guess (complete guess!) that you probably would have fluids if you were going to have surgery, hopefully someone more knowledgeable than me can confirm. I know I had lots pumped in when they thought I was going for a crash EMCS, although I might have needed them regardless.

I think IV fluids can sometimes artificially raise the baby's birth weight slightly, so it looks like they've lost more weight than they have. That's what my mum told me when she told me to ignore the HV when DS wasn't putting on weight at first. (disclaimer: she's not a medic!)

[wineapotamus]

Just wanted to tell everyone who helped me in tricky times that little wine has put on 250g in a week and smashed her birthweight! With a bottle every other day (average) she has predominantly breast milk and mw was v positive about getting her back on the boob full time. I'm absolutely delighted and really grateful for all the support on here and irl.

[AyeAmarok]

Congratulations OP! That's great news, thanks for updating. If a bottle every other day means you can continue breastfeeding by just topping her up then that's a great idea,and a perfect solution. It should never be an all or nothing situation.