What to say to people who say "this formula is CLOSEST to breastmilk" -

[Lucy1977]

Hi

I don't want to cause offence to anyone, but in my mind an infant formula cannot be "closest" to breastmilk but I cant get my words together to explain this to people who say "I use "x" formula because it's supposed to be closest to breastmilk".

Anyone help?

Thanks
Lucy

riab...sadly, yes, a lot of m/w's and HV's might be "promoting" Breastfeeding Vocally, but sadly most don't know actually much about it, so, as soon as there is a problem, their advice seems to be...give Formula and to make themselfs feel better as well as the mum, they will then add somehting along the lines of... Formula is just as good anyway...
As for not offering Formula feeding advice, I assume it's more down to not being allowed to (Policies) rather then not wanting to...!

It's part of an HV and m/w's job to advise mothers on how to formula feed safely, surely....no one prevents them from doing that, do they?

If they are prevented from recommending a brand, then that's good, because they have no decent information to base any recommendation on!

I suppose there is always the point that, obviously there is everything that one needs to know about how to make a bottle on the tin of Formula...
btw, I am not saying that, if a mom is formula feeding she shouldn't be given the appropriate advice...

mumfor1st - the only help I got whilst in hospital was from DH, you would have honestly thought i'd reared ten other children cos for some reason they just left me to get on with it.

The thing that shocked me the most was, one of the midwives came in to show us a 'bottle feeding demonstration'. Now, I was bottle feeding fair enough, but seriously, they were taking the p*ss - DS WAS TWO DAYS OLD!!!!!! What the hell did they think i'd done up till now, starved him till they were ready?!

And she'd brought the wrong milk anyway - SMA and I was using Cow and Gate

Evilshed - lol, this sounds like my experience in hospital! I remember struggling one night to get ds to sleep and when I asked for help a midwife came over and just took him away from me for a few minutes. She didn't sit with me or chat. Ds came back swaddled and asleep.

Also remember a time when I nipped to the loo and left ds next to my bed with curtains around. Came back to discover curtains had been drawn and ds sitting there open to all to see. I got v angry as I also wanted to get changed! Nothing at all was explained to me in hospital - whether to take ds to the loo with me, where the bottles were, where I leave dirty nappies, where to leave dirty gowns I could go on but I'm going off the original subject a bit! (dare I mention that I never once had my sheets changed in 3 nights and had to lay something over my blood stains..?)

We got a 'how to bath baby' demo though and not a formula feed one, which was a waste of time too!

tiktok that 'evils' was more related to some breastfeeding nazis that I encountered during dd1's early days.... not to anyone here.

eidsvold what exactly are breastfeeding nazis please?

I really honestly have never understood this term. What is meant by it?

what an awful term - really offensive

I'm guessing its 'breastfeeders' that round 'formula feeders' up and do unspeakable things to them???? [

"breastfeeding nazis" to me are the people who thought it was acceptable to stop me in the street, ask how i was feeding my baby and then lecutre me in public about how i was 'lazy, carelss, and unwomanly' because i wasn't breastfeeding.

They are also the Health visitors who watched me bleed into his mouth crying with pain and said - 'oh you'll get used to it this is normal' and then refused to come back and talk to me and DH about safe preperation of bottles when we decided to switch to formula.

they are the women who talk loudly and smugly about how their childs health, intelligence and cuteness is obviuosly down to extended breastfeeding. All this in the same room as a poor women with a bottle in her bag.

They are the men and women who tell me off in the DR surgery and say that whatever is wrong with DS its because i didn't Breastfeed.

Its the midwife who tried to insist that i got up in a postnatal group and 'explained' why i was formula feeding when 'everyone' knew Breast was best.

Not really comparable with Nazis though, Riab, upsetting though that must have been for you.

riab, you must have met an exeptional number of lunatics and that was very unlucky a in general breastfeeders do not accost people on the street and as you'll know from reading threads on mn THE MAJORITY OF hvS GO THE OPPOSITE WAY AND PUSH formula (sorry about caps)

you made your choice and thats perfectly fair but don't accuse all of us who put up with the bleeding nipples and pain and came out the other side of being nazis as you are no better than the women who you describe in your post if you do.

breastfeeding nazis are the women who - presumably - round up the women who aren't breastfeeding and put them in death camps to murder them. persumably.
it's just a nasty, vile, unacceptable term and it makes me so angry every time I hear it and it bears no relationship whatsoever ime to the many great people trying to support other women in their method of feeding.

thats true pt ,the minute your baby loses weight its formula formula formula.

Although I see what pt is saying ,its just such a shame you experienced such nasty time of it.You must know that not every bf mum is insensitive to others and what you have gone through seems an extreme. Id be so so shocked at commenst like that, but I think stroppy mum in me would say how dare they make those judgments.

I myself had a horror of a time with dd1 got a lot of help with counsellors and HVs , but still got told to give her formula !Im glad I perservered with dd2 as I actually really enjoyed it and still do although mixing now.

I don't compare them to nazi's I know alot of people think that term is an increble insult. However someone mentioned the term and asked why it was used.
I think if (like me) you have felt hounded and as if you are a 'lesser being' then you may well end up using the term 'nazi' to describe people who have been behaving in such an intolerant way.

Hounded, yes, and that's vile and sad.

But not rounded up and put into a concentration camp, Riab.

It's offensive. Can't you see why?

riab, I am sorry for your experiences, but I think the term nazi in this context is completely offensive for all sorts of reasons.

I'll just repeat: I personally DON'T use the term nazi to describe anyone. I was trying to explain why someone who was feeling 'got at' might use the term.

I gather that pg or nursing mothers were on the receiving end of some particularly unspeakable acts too.

Riab, you have had, IMO, more than your average/fair share of horrible experiences. That must be awful for you.

But I simply cannot equate those people with the people that did, without compunction, 'abort' near term babies for 'research' and their mothers killed by its being ripped - literally - out of her womb without anaesthetic or pain relief. I just cannot.

sorry riab I don't mean to go on - but that's exactly what you did say in your post of 12.56 breastfeedings nazis are..... these people.
and I think anyone who chooses to extended breastfeed knows what it feels like to face criticism and nasty upsetting remarks. maybe the woman who was doing that was trying to justify her decision in the face of so much disapproval and mockery?

My point being that their is NO justification for using the term 'Nazi'.....

you bloody breastfeeders at it again?

Shockers, aren't we, Custy?

No its not the most pleasant phrase , granted and being jewish I should be even more offended than others. I suppose it used to show the severity of judgment made against formula feeding parents.

The severest judgement of a ffeeding parent doesn't come CLOSE to what the Nazis did!