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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

young breastfeeders

33 replies

katiebirdie · 03/11/2006 20:27

This is a part poll/part rant thread!

Just wondering how many young breastfeeders we have here on mumsnet? I am 20 and am breastfeeding my 12week ds and feeling pressure from people my own age re breastfeeding. Most have been very supportive (in particular my mum and dad and dp) but couple of girls I thought were mates (especially SIL) have been really hurtful about it. Know it shouldnt bother me but its really winding me up now. I would have thought the people of my generation would have a more positive, modern and informed attitude to breastfeeding but clearly not! How did any of you other young mums deal with anti breastfeeding peer pressure. Am not gonna give up because of it but really in need of some armour!

OP posts:
MerlinsBeard · 03/11/2006 20:29

I was told not to BF DS1 as i was too young....i was 21!! SAdly i believed her and only fed for 2 weeks! With DS2 BF was making me very tired and hv (same one) said that i was young and fit and had no reason to be lacking energy. turned out i was aneamic and him feeding every 2 hours was taking its toll. lasted till 16 weeks tho

Koshka1984 · 03/11/2006 20:30

katie i think you are doing a brilliant job!

the people i know throough friends who have kids, about 6, all about 20 to 25 all bottlefeed through choice.

i do bottlefeed, but not entirely through choice, and the guilt still kills me.

just want to say, if you have support from the people who matter to you then thats the best thing. Good luck in the future.

moondog · 03/11/2006 20:30

Hi KB.
I'm ancient (39) but very passionate about b/feeding and just want to give you a big cyber pat on the back.
It must be hard for you,but you obviously have the support of those that matter.Good on you,you sound fantastic.

Hang on,I'll try and do a good link for you....

MerlinsBeard · 03/11/2006 20:30

sorry, i hadn't read your post properly, was too wound up having a rant

You do whatever you feel comfpratble with for your children, be that breast OR bottle imo. its got nothing to do with anyone else but you

DizzyBint · 03/11/2006 20:31

good for you katie, carrying on with that kind of peer pressure. i'm not as young as you, i had dd when i was 25 and none of my peers were breastfeeding. in fact in my circle of mums not one breastfeeds. i'm 26 now, still breatfeeding my 6 month old.

tribpot · 03/11/2006 20:31

Wow .. how can you be "too young" to breastfeed, that's mad? My sis had a baby when she was 19 and breastfed perfectly successfully, what's the big deal?! Katie, you will always get support on MN, what a shame other young mums can't be more supportive of your choices.

FillyjonkTheFireEater · 03/11/2006 20:33

at being told too young to bf. wtf?

am now 29...and bf dd. ds was born when I was 25 and yes, I bf him for about 15 months, but none of my same age friends did likewise, as I recall.

I do this this is rather a huge issue, tbh.

moondog · 03/11/2006 20:37

This provides useful information.

TiggernPooh2 · 03/11/2006 21:11

Hi Katie,

Again well done for sticking at it. I am a bit older, was 25 when ds was born now I am 26 and ds is 13 months. He is still bf and will be for some time to come I would think.

I am an army wife and not sure if that has any bearing but I too only knew 1 other mum who was bfing her lo.

I did not have any 'peer pressure' but had a few comments about why I bf but worse was from dh who said 'everyone else was botlefeeding theirs, so why can't I then I could go out!!!' Lets just say we had words and he has not mentioned it since {grin}.

Sorry hijacked this a bit but it makes me so MAD how people feel they have the right to comment about this. Do what you feel is best and ignore any negativity.

gonfleur · 03/11/2006 21:15

Good going on the bf - you know more than they do! It's hard when you do something different to others but you might change their thinking on bf. Lots of best wishes xxx

gonfleur · 03/11/2006 21:15

Good going on the bf - you know more than they do! It's hard when you do something different to others but you might change their thinking on bf. Lots of best wishes xxx

QuootiePieBANGERSandMash · 03/11/2006 21:19

Hiya - im 20, and been BFing since I was 19. Hes 7 months now, and going strong! I didnt give it a second thought with regards to my age...

bctmum · 03/11/2006 21:20

check out lots of bf pictures

tutu100 · 03/11/2006 21:24

I think it's great that you are breastfeeding. Keep going you are doing your child the best thing in the world. I think however you choose to feed your child people will make comments both negative and positive. Remember you are feeding your child the way nature intended and you are giving them the best start you can in life. Well done. The feeling I got when people told me how well my ds was developing knowing that all his nutrition was coming from me was amazing. Just turn a deaf ear to peoples comments, or try to educate others about bf, be proud of yourself. I just used to point out that before SMA there was no choice in how you fed your baby, it was bf or they die. That normally shut people up.

JanenEvie · 03/11/2006 21:44

Hi katie
Thats so sad that you've been made to feel this way!
I'm 23 and am still BF my 20week old dd! I've had nothing but postive feedback about this esp from people I didnt expect i.e Grandparents and inlaws!
Just tell these people that you want to do what you feel is best for your baby and is they're not comfortable with it they should leave........
After all they're the one with the problem about it not you

littlepiggie · 03/11/2006 21:50

Just looked at the link, little angels is the bf support group in my area, they have a great support group.
I am also 26, (25 when ds was born) and find people assume i ff as i do look young for my age (people think my sisiter is the older one, 21)

BIGlilBUBU · 03/11/2006 22:14

I was a young breastfeeder. Im 20 aswell. Stopped bf ds when he was about 9months old, I wanted to bf till he was one but it didnt work out like that for various reasons. All my mum friends my age bottle fed. One because she knew nothing about breastfeeding, doesnt have a mum to help and support her, said she gave it a go but didnt manage to get her dd latched. Another was determined to bf but lost alot of blood through childbirth and was advised not to by midwifes, I feel really sorry for her. Another was 14 when she had her dd now 5, she was still at school and wasnt sure if dd would go up for adoption or not. Im the only one so far that successfully bf for a decent amount of time, and I feel really proud of myself. You should be too Katie, its nice to hear that someone else my age isnt afraid to bf.

Jackstini · 03/11/2006 22:14

Hi Katie - am not as young as you! (34) but I did get some comments re bf-ing. Didn't give a hoot - I knew I was doing what felt best for me and dd.
You carry on and if anyone comments ask them to give you a good reason why on earth you would ever do otherwise!

kama · 03/11/2006 22:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

BIGlilBUBU · 03/11/2006 22:21

What kind of things do they say to you katie?
I have a few friends that werent breasfed themselves, there first experience of breastfeeding was whatching me breastfeed ds. They are all set on breastfeeding when they have children one day. If they hadnt had a friend that breastfed then maybe they wouldn't have. I think your setting a good example Katie. Just ignore them, there being really ignorant.

Original poster
katiebirdie · 03/11/2006 22:24

Thanks everyone, its nice to see there are other young mums out there breastfeeding. I have had fab support from the important people and was completely determined even before ds was born. Think its just more shock really that people have such a negative attitude towards my choice. Very naive of me but while I was pregnant it didnt even occur to me that people might react in this way! Am proud to bf my son and when i receive negativity it fuels my determination not hide away like a leper! If me feeding my son in the way natured intended offends them then they obviously have serious issues! Thank you for the support everyone, love up to you all xxx

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BIGlilBUBU · 03/11/2006 22:29

Thanks for starting this thread by the way Katie, I thought I was probely the youngest mum on mumsnet. I wonder who the yougest mum on mumsnet is......Might start a new thread.

BIGlilBUBU · 03/11/2006 22:30

probably not probely...

VoodooBanana · 03/11/2006 22:34

well done Katie!

I am an older young mum, (28) and amused to find out my friends were shocked I breast feed!

I have done it for 4mths now, but they all bottle feed. I dont care, breast is what I want to give to MY baby. I was lucky in that my mum and my MIL breast fed 3 babies each, so they are very positive rolemodels.
Keep on doing what you want!
I am proud to be educating my friends, they ask so many questions...

Original poster
katiebirdie · 03/11/2006 22:38

In fairness they are starting to reign it in as obviously realise its not welcomed but mostly things like "do you not worry your dp wont see you the same" , "dont know how you can bear that" and one even said "i couldnt handle having a limpet!" I was more upset at ds being called a limpet tbh! I have tried the route of educating and discussing pros of bf etc but tbh it just makes me feel like I am justifying my choice whereas now I feel like its none of their bloody buisiness. On the plus side some of my friends have now taken a positive interest in bf and I hope will consider it when they have children.

Lol at youngest mum - do I get a prize? Will be 21 in May (and shock horror will probably still be bfing!!!! lol)

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