BF 31mo DD

[SESthebrave]

I'm lucky to have enjoyed BFing both DS and DD. DS stopped naturally around 21mo and I always thought DD would do similar.

We're now approaching 31mo and she feeds at bedtime and on waking and if she wakes in the night (about 30% of the time). She often asks during the day but most of the time I manage to distract her.

I'm now at the stage though where much as I will miss it (she is my last), I'm ready for her to stop.

If I try to refuse I tend to get a very distraught DD, even if DH is there to put her to bed or distract her.

Any thoughts or advice please?

Shamelessly bumping

No advice,but lots of sympathy. I'm at the same stage with 29mth old ds.

I'm afraid when my son was still feeding at 39 months I left him with my mum for a weekend and went to stay with a friend. When I came back I just said 'booby milk gone' if he asked, and after a day or too he stopped asking. I would have liked to explain it more to him but he has ASD and so his understanding isn't great.

He still has booby cuddles (skin to skin) if he asks, usually just before bed...

Sorry, forgot to say I think the break was the key as he had over 48 hours with no booby and that seemed to makr it easier for him to accept that booby milk was gone, iyswim?

I stopped at 31 months earlier in the year using a combination of things -

• go shopping for a new 'cold milk' cup. Dd got to chose what she wanted and we talked about her being a big girl and having cold milk before bedtime.

• bedtime routine was with DP rather than me. He would do bath, loads of stories and distraction with cold milk (of course) and I'd be "at the gym" or "cooking tea" basically unavailable

• we counted down from about 4 or 5 days when my milk would be gone. It was called "me-me" and so I'd say, 2 more days and me-me will be gone. We talked about it constantly and by the time the day came to stop it wasn't a surprise. By that point she'd been going to bed without my milk.

• morning feed was our hardest as she'd wake early and it was easy to snuggle in bed and feed. Best strategy for this was to get up and eat breakfast. Hard at first (for us not dd!) but she got it straight away.

• finally, treat yourself once you've stopped. I grieved a little for it but I was ready to stop. Dd just needed that little nudge in the right direction.

Hope this helps, feel free to pm me if you want to. Happy to talk off line

Oh thank you so much for your replies and support. I'm feeling quite emotional about it this evening and guilty but I guess that's normal.

With DS I didn't even know his last feed was his last feed. It just happened. I selfishly wish DD would just want to feed occasionally and not be so reliant. I jokingly said to her this morning "is it Mummy you love or milky?" I quickly got the reply "milky" :(

I do like the idea of buying her a new cup for her milk vi think that would help her.

Really hoping now that she's not had her last BF though. Guilt, guilt, guilt!

Oh and Islander97, isn't it a shame that we have to use phrases like "I'm afraid...still feeding at 39mo". I have the utmost respect for you for doing that but society in the main seems to find BFing beyond 12mo surprising at best and offensive at worst.