Struggling - wise words needed!

[Peanut15]

Dd is on her fourth night. I'm breastfeeding and really struggling tonight. She'd settled ok in her Moses basket the last 3 nights but tonight my milk is coming in and she feeds for like 30 secs then falls asleep.

I survived this after a c sec with ds and fed him for a year but I'm finding this so much harder. I had a forceps delivery with episiotomy and tear. It hurts to sit so much it's just so uncomfy.

Dh is being good but he can only do so much.

Any tips?

I've been putting DS on the floor when he falls asleep on the boob, a this wakes him up pdq and keep on until he until he seems full. A bit mean though! It sounds rotten, those first few days always are in my experience. They do say never quit BF on a bad day.

None of this sounds very wise I'm afraid!.

Tips for the tear: I found Durex Aloe Vera lube very soothing - best kept in the fridge. You can fill a condom with water, wrap in gauze and pop it into the freezer for a well shaped ice pack.

Bf is bloody hard.

Hi peanut, congrats on your dd!
I don't know about wise words but I had similar delivery and also struggled with pain and discomfort whilst feeding. I found experimenting with side-lying positions helped and when dd was finished I could yank down my knickers and waft my bum with a slipper! So soothing! I also bought some 'post partum tea bags' (Google/amazon these, they are American but I got mine from a doula and think you can get online) also so soothing and invaluable. Otherwise all the other suggestions of cold compress/witch hazel/cushion/double pads/pain relief etc from my midwife did help cumulatively I think, alongside taking some arnica pills for swelling.
Keep ip the amazing work, I'm sure dd will settle once she gets used to the flow, I'm not sure I can help on that front except to say that my dd needed some encouragement at night time with toe tickling and side-swapping

Thank you. Good tips both. Doesn't help that the 3 day baby blues kicked in today so I'm a leaking tearful mess!

Awww it's tough Peanut but persevere - just look at the little darling you got out of it. It's good dh is being supportive. Make sure you drink loads of water.

Love the durex lube and condom suggestions - nothing like that in my day, just the rubber ring

For the sleeping - I fed mine naked (her not me) the sensations seemed to remind her what she was doing. With a nappy on obvs!

not sure I have any wise words, just wanted to say keep going, its super hard I found having our second really hard, I think best advice I can offer is to keep up your calorie intake, send someone for a quad pack of mars bars asap!?

Just been through the same thing and ended up a big sobbing mess on the phone to the national breastfeeding helpline. The best thing I did was express milk and gave it in a bottle. Not only did it mean DS got some proper food and then slept but it also softened my breasts, allowing him to latch on properly next feed. If you don't want to use a bottle you could chuck the milk, it's getting to the stage where your breasts are less like footballs that's key.

I hope you're okay, it really stressed me out but a few days on it's worlds better.