Night Feeders Part 5. Calling all women who find themselves feeding when they'd rather be sleeping!!

[Writerwannabe83]

This is a thread for anyone who wants support when things seem tough - especially for the women whose babies don't like sleep!!

We'll do the usual introductions:

I'm a first time mom to my 6 month old, EBF son. It's been a rocky few months, lots of ups and downs but we've finally reached a point where he's asleep by 7.30pm and only waking once during the night.

He very rarely naps in the day - and when he does it's only when he's in the car or his pushchair. It's very frustrating!!

And the last little thing about us is that we have just started the weaning journey - it's fun but messy!!

Just got back from baby swimming. Nat stayed awake for 2 and a half hours before it, I was going spare as I thought he'd just pass out in the pool or scream the place down. But he loved it, and didn't sleep until we got home where the poor little thing had a meltdown of being too tired to eat and too hungry to sleep. Screaming when I put the bottle in his mouth. I managed to get a few oz down him and he's passed out. It's difficult doing these booked and paid for classes when you have no idea when they'll sleep, he's still so little. But then I don't want to sit in the house either. I am also incredibly tired now. Might try and sleep because surely he's out for a few hours.

How old can they start swimming then? I'd like DD to start!

The place I go is called Miniswimming and they start them at 6 weeks! But there will be different rules for different classes/pools. I wouldn't be taking him to the big leisure pool yet as it's a bit grubby and cold, but these are private lessons in a private pool so it's warmer and small. Some places might want them to have had their first injections (Nat's having his on Thursday!). We swooshed in the water, had a splash and did a dunk! He was great with it. We are both utterly wrecked now, him for doing it and me from getting him ready and getting us both changed afterwards!

Hi ladies will catch up on posts when I'm doing Ryder's bedtime feed but here's the news from the hospital today, for now he just has to be scanned every 3 months til he's 1 year old. Right kidney functions at 46% and left at 54%. Could hopefully sort itself. He's staying on the trimethoprim tho. better results/news than we thought we'd get. The measurements from his scan are only a bit over the upper normal limits

Cannot that's super news!! :)

Fantastic news!

Yay cannot glad it was good news :)

I'm glad your appointment went well and you have left with some good news!! Fingers crossed that his kidneys will mend themselves

We've had an active day today but Arron has only had 2x45 minute naps. At 6pm he looked exhausted so after prising him out of FIL's hands (we were there for dinner) I went home and started getting him ready for bed. He's having a feed now and I'm hoping he will have a good sleep tonight.

Just out of interest, when did people start setting a bedtime for their DCs and what time?

Ours is tiny so we tend to put her down about 8pm as she naps quite a lot of the day - but opinions seem so different as to what age and what time to do bedtime.

I started doing a bedtime routine starting at 7 of bath, massage, pjs, feed, sleep from 8 weeks but he was still quite cluster feedy then and he would often not settle until 8:30 ish but over time that came forward as feeds shortened now the whole thing takes 30 minutes from bath to asleep

Wonderful news cannot!

We do a loose routine of bath, bottle bed at 8, but on some nights it's not so easy (he only woke up 20 mins ago so I'm going to bath at 8, and he was starving when he woke so it's more bottle bath possibly bottle again bed!) until he stops being so random with sleeping and eating during the day. Once he's asleep after 8-9ish he tends to sleep until 11ish and then is very predictable feeding every two hours until we get up at 7.30. We stay in the bedroom in the dark between 11.30-7, that's my main set thing, keep nighttime night and daytime day, and we've done that since he was 2 weeks. I've only cracked and come down to watch telly twice when he really wouldn't sleep. We are going to try the cot from 8 next week when he's 2 months. I'm going to try and be chill about it though as things crop up, people visit and he's very little still. I'm of the feeling he'll sort himself when he's ready, I just have to give him the opportunity to go to bed! If he's still a bugger when he's 6 months I'll start being strict!

Thanks ladies!

Our bedtime routine is bath at 6.40pm, dressed and in grobag and being fed by 7pm latest. Can feed anywhere between 10-30mins and he gets put in his cot whether he's asleep or not. That is it!

Redling will ask around about swimming. Really want Suze to learn to love water.

Thanks for the bedtime routines. She's only 3 weeks so I just come up with her 7 or 8, dim lights, change and feed and put her down. Just go with when she's tired within reason. Glad I'm not being too slow - 8 weeks sounds a good time to start a proper bed time.

DH is back in the main bedroom tonight. Before now tge sleepyhead has been on his half of tge bed. Hope she doesn't scare him back to the spare room!

We didn't start implementing a set routine until Arron was about 4 months old.

We had a loose routine for his early months but there seemed little point as his feeding and sleeping patterns were still so erratic that it was pointless trying to contain them. I found myself getting really worked up and stressed if the 'routine' didn't go to plan and I put a lot of pressure on myself to try and make Arron go to sleep at a certain time etc and it really negatively affected me. I posted about it on the 'Sleep' forum because I was getting so worked up over it and was told to just relax, be led by Arron and allow him to fall into his own routine. His bedtimes continued to be unpredictable, one night he'd be asleep by 7pm but the next he'd be wide awake until 10pm, and although it was difficult I was in a better place emotionally because I wasn't beating myself up about the lack of routine.

When Arron was 4 months old we started implementing the bath, feed and bed routine but we didn't stick to a set time, just aimed to be feeding him around 8pm. He's now 6 months old and when I look back I see how he actually has fallen into his own routine and by me following his lead his bedtimes have naturally been starting earlier because as he's getting more active he's getting tired earlier.

As things currently stand I want him upstairs and being fed by 7.30pm at the latest - this is still very flexible though as he was already fast asleep by then tonight. If he looks tired earlier than the 'routine' says he should then I just bring the routine forward. Some days I'm bathing him at 7.15pm but other days it's 6.30pm, it just depends on how he seems.

I don't think it's the timings of the routine that matters but more that things are done in a set order so that baby knows it's bedtime.

I'm the type of person who can get very anxious and overwrought about things if I'm not careful which is why I take a relaxed attitude to the bedtime routine. If I started getting fixated on it and believing that x, y and z must be done in a certain order and at a certain time I know I would drive myself crazy. I'm the type of woman who if Arron's bathtime was running 10 minutes behind schedule I would have some kind of breakdown and so to avoid that happening don't have a schedule.

Parenting is stressful enough for me without putting more added pressures on myself.

My DH is in the spare room for a while I think, with a feed pretty much every two hours and he's on duty from 6 he'd never sleep if he was in with us! If he doesn't sleep at least 5 hours in a go I guess we'll be back together when he goes in his own room in 4 months time! He's away on business for two nights from tomorrow so he's letting DS sleep on him right now because he'll miss him. It's so lovely to see how much he loves him!

Cannot great news from the hospital for you

I'm looking forward to starting a bed time routine, I'm Gona try a lose one from 8 weeks.
DP is asleep already and I'm shattered but left holding the baby.

I went to a mum and baby group today, I just wanted to make friends but I didn't feel they were my kind if people, got me down a little as I wanted new mummy friends. We are starting baby massage tomorrow so hopefully I'll meet some mummy's there.
Had a good day with DS in the sling today, he slept while I walked around town and got some shopping bits done

Can I just ask what age babies are being put in their own rooms at? Heard loads of different things and not sure what to do for the best?!

My DS is 6 months and still in with me. I can't bear the thought of putting him in his own room. Mind you, we co-sleep an awful lot so him having his own room would be pretty pointless

My friend had get baby in it's own room when it was 8 weeks.

The guidelines are to keep baby with you for 6 months to reduce chances of SIDS but I know a lot of women do it earlier.

I'm on first wake up of the night after him only sleeping 4.5 hours. I'm feeding him but he seems generally unsettled and I think his teeth are playing up as he keeps fiddling with his ears.

I'm planning to keep DS with me/us if DH will come back to the bedroom for 6 months. Longer if I want to , but maybe sooner if he sleeps well or if we keep him awake when he's older. I haven't put him in the bedroom alone before we go to bed yet though and he's 8 weeks old. I want him with us all evening really as he sleeps in our arms but as he seems to want to sleep from 8 I think I should let him go to bed.

He's been asleep from 8.30-9ish. I should be sleeping but because he's gone a long time for him without waking/feeding I can't because I feel I'm on standby. I know when I drop off he'll wake up!

He's not quite awake (eyes closed, still periods) but is getting there, kicking a bit and a bit of sleep hand sucking. A bit of light whimpering. But now he's stopped again! Argh I don't know if I should feed him!

Redling
Are you breast or bottle feeding?
My breast fed DS (4 weeks) seems to go to sleep between 8-10 most nights and I know I generally get 3 hrs till he wakes. Because I BF if he were to grizzle or not seem asleep enough, I'd pop him back on the boob.
I'm on first feed of the night... I only ever get 1/2 hr to 2 hrs from now on till morning..... Wish he would give me longer blocks

sammy he's ff with a couple of expressed bm bottles a day. He did just properly wake and gulped4oz and is now asleep on my shoulder (I want him to gently burp!) He usually feeds every 2 hours so this is great! If only it had been 12-5 rather than 8-1.

Oh ff is diff and not something I am experienced on yet.
I love it when they fall asleep on your shoulder
I just tried to put DS down and he woke straight away, why are they such pickles, it's always making sure they are in a deep enough sleep

DH not compatible with dd tonight: his snoring annoys her and she is on an eat n poo all night mood (he's up for work at 6).
He escaped to the spare room and hour ago! I can feed her and change her and she can sleep in the few moments between tonight!