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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

If you're out and you're breastfeeding somewhere, and somebody comes up to you and points out a feeding room...

76 replies

emkana · 09/09/2006 08:29

... do you feel you have to go and move and feed there, or do you stay where you are if you want to?

I never know whether it's meant as a friendly offer or as something more.

OP posts:
Clayhead · 09/09/2006 08:31

I would have said I was comfy where I was!

SueW · 09/09/2006 08:31

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at OP's request.

Twiglett · 09/09/2006 08:31

I used to say "Oh thank you very much but I'm fine here" and smile cheerily

Twiglett · 09/09/2006 08:31

Triple Snap

trinityrhino · 09/09/2006 08:32

I just say "thanks" and carry on

I wouldsn't go into a feeding room just cause someone else told me to , polite offer of help or not

Normsnockers · 09/09/2006 08:34

Message withdrawn

auntymandy · 09/09/2006 08:38

I think I would have replied as everyone else. I have breastfed all 5 of mine and only once asked if I would like somewhere more private to feed, I was in a hospital waiting room!!!

misdee · 09/09/2006 08:40

i would say 'i'm fine here, thank you very much'

intergalacticwalrus · 09/09/2006 08:43

Agree that "feeding rooms" are like a glorified bog.

I was never asked to move when Bfing DS1, and if I get asked, I'd probably say something along the lines of pps.

I'm quite discreet anyway, I wouldn't like to impose vast amounts of norkage onto the general public.

Thomcat · 09/09/2006 08:44

Depends where I was. I might prefer to be in a quiet room on my own where I could slouch back and close my eyes and may appreciate it being pointed out.

Depends, I might be very grateful or I might say 'ok thanks' and crack on where i was.

ohana · 09/09/2006 09:24

lots of threads about htis. i have never ever had anyone say anything like this to me. and i breastfeed everywhere.

ohana · 09/09/2006 09:24

fed, no longer. past tense.

LaDiDaDi · 09/09/2006 09:46

I would say the same as the others ie "Thanks for the offer but I'm fine here."

They may well be trying to be helpful. I hope that was my health visitor's intention when after getting dd weighed at clinic when she started to cry because she was hungry and I went to go back into the waiting room she offered to find me a free room to feed her in. She seemed surprised that I would rather go back in the waiting room with a glossy mag to flick through and other mums to chat to rather than go in a poky office on my own!

twelveyeargap · 09/09/2006 09:57

I suppose lots of people really might be trying to be nice, but given there are lots of incidents of people being asked to stop, that we're probably quick to assume that the intent is bad.
If you would actually like to see if there's a comfy chair somewhere, then you might be glad, but smiling and saying "thanks so much, but I'm fine here" is ok. Obviously no need to get militant unless it's really necessary.
The only time anyone ever said anything to me (and I fed my daughter on buses and all sorts of places), was an older lady came over to tell me how wonderful it was to see a young girl (I was 16) "nursing" her baby. I thought it was lovely of her.

moondog · 09/09/2006 09:59

12,you were b/feeding at 16??

Wow!!

LaDiDaDi · 09/09/2006 10:19

I think part of the prob is how crap feeding rooms are. if they had lovely comfy sofas and nice squishyy chairs, with glossy mags and a water cooler then I for one would be keen to use them. Unfortunately the reality is (ime) that they are dark corners with a big bin of smelly nappies in them, so when someone offers the "opportunity" to use one you automatically feel that they are trying to shove you off somewhere because they don't want to see you bf, rather than because they genuinely want you to be comfortable.

marthamoo · 09/09/2006 10:38

It's funny but I thought of this the other day when I was in ELC. They have a toilet in there and the door was slightly ajar - there's a plastic chair in the corner (opposite the toilet). It was really stinky - you could smell it in the shop and then I saw a sign on the toilet door "You are Welcome to Feed Here." If anyone had tried to tell me to feed in that stinky little room next to a toilet I think I might have said something stronger than "thanks, I'm fine here"

hermykne · 09/09/2006 10:40

i'd say ok, know that for next time (as if)

twelveyeargap · 09/09/2006 11:08

proud Thanks!

FillyjonktheBananaEater · 09/09/2006 11:13

do you know though, i have been bf pretty much continously for 3 years (2 kids, small age gap) and I have never once been asked to move.

I was once given a cornish pasty and a £1, but thats about it.

I know it happens, and its shite, but am actually quite impressed by how unfazed strangers usually are. And I am NOT discrete, sadly.

fattiemumma · 09/09/2006 11:16

i wouldn't want to eat my meal in a toilet and i wouldn't expect my child to either.

edam · 09/09/2006 11:21

You were given a cornish pasty and a pound? Why, did the pound person think you were a beggar or something?! Mind boggles...

kittywits · 09/09/2006 11:26

I'd say " no thanks I'm alright where i am"

Spidermama · 09/09/2006 11:29

This happened to me in the doctor's surgery once.

I was happily feeding my baby while waiting for the doctor when the receptionist said, 'Would you like to go and do that in another room?'
I just smiled sweetly and said, 'No thanks. We're fine here'.

Initially I genuinely believed she was offering for my benefit, but when I thought about it afterwards it was obvious she found feeding 'in public' offensive.

I'm glad I misunderstood her intentions as benevolent because had I realised she was voicing some sort of objection I'm sure I'd have been more defensive.

The response I gave, accidentally as it turned out, was the coreect one. I didn't allow myself to become involved in any way in her disapproval. There was nowhere else she could go from there.

FillyjonktheBananaEater · 09/09/2006 11:41

well, she ha a sally army uniform on and i was surrounded by bags. Ds was 2 weeks old and I had not slept for...about 2 weeks, I guess.

The bags were waterstones and habitat ones. I was out present shopping for dp's birthday.

It was a nice cornish pasty.