3wk old constant feeding------pls pls help

[Mrspedro]

My dd is over 3wks, first time
Breastfeeder and I need help.
Up to now she's been a natural champ of a feeder but I'm getting desperate now and I'm totally delusional with tiredness. She had been cluster feeding from 6pm-6am which was fine but since wed it starts at 3pm and she feeds more or less straight tru til morning..she settles&stops feeding, I put her down and she wakes and the cycle continues. At times she seems frustrated on the boob like she's not getting anything and other times I can hear her swallow quite a bit. We cosleep and at times I get to drift off but the lack of sleep is turning me into a grumpy negative person. It's just not like me and I don't like it.
My husband has to work, my family don't live nearby and Iv three other young children.
Iv tried a soother and expressing so DH can give it while I sleep and she's refused both.
I know you'll tell me this will pass but we'r on day 4 of literally non stop feeding... Sling or not I'm dying here

That sounds so tough and exhausting for you.

It's normal for babies to feed a lot during growth spurts, but for a baby to go that long without coming up for air is exceptional. Has your little one been checked for tongue tie? A tie can restrict the efficiency of a feed and make clusters longer than they need to be.

Btw lots of wet and dirty nappies, she was born 7lb6 and was 8lb twelve days post birth..she's due to be weighed Monday but I'm confident she's putting on enough

Thanks Danny,she does have a slight tongue tie but up to now it hasn't effected feeding.. She has a good latch and that's all the hv seemed concerned with. I'll ask her about t on Monday (which seems so so far away)

I know it's a bit controversial so early but have you tried a dummy if she just needs to suckle?

It could just be a growth spurt but you could also get the tongue tie checked again. The baby may look externally like the latch is good but the baby may be inefficient at extracting milk.

it's very difficult to get anything constructive out of hv etc regarding bottle feeding
mix feeding worked really well for dd - formula satisfies them for longer so sleep improves
but of course the precious little treasures must co-operate to achieve that
try different teats? easier flow ones?
hang in there; it will pass
but it's knackering until then

Could she be getting overtired and struggling to fall asleep despite a full tummy? Mine used to graze for hours and I think he was just tired and grumpy but couldn't fall asleep properly. Would it be worth feeding for a while and then trying another way of getting her to sleep eg walking in pram/sling/car? I used to stop feeding him after 2 hours and walk him around in the baby carrier until he fell asleep (he would usually cry for a bit but once asleep he would usually stay asleep for several hours so I think he really did need to sleep).

Now at 15wks I have the opposite problem that he falls asleep too quickly at his bedtime feed and then wakes up again after half an hour because he's not full!

Is it just overnight?

Some babies just really like to suckle. I would try a dummy as well. With DC1 I learnt to slide my nipple out and the dummy in without waking him so I could go to sleep.

I would suspect overtired as well.
It was a mistake I made with my first. Every time she cried I fed her. She really just needed to be asleep.
Personally I also think I ended up over feeding her. That gave her indigestion so she cried even more!
We mixed fed as well (1 bottle a day) very successfully. Gave me the few hrs rest I needed.
Dummies can be a life saver if they'll take one.
Mine liked swaddling and white noise too. Worked wonders.

I was also one who thought that when DS cried it meant h was hungry and so I'd automatically offer the breast. DS would suckle for about 5 minutes pull off, fall asleep, wake up and cry so I'd assume he hadn't fed enough and put him back to the breast. It was relentless. It was so hard listening to the crying that I think I saw the breast as an instant silencer and so that would always be my first port of call.

I was exhausted and ended up crying for an hour to my HV who talked to me about the behaviours of overtired babies and how I shouldn't be so quick to just offer the breast all the time. She told me to try other methods to settle DS and also suggested I try a dummy. DS was 4 weeks at the time and I wasn't very keen but I was just so tired that I knew I had to try something. It took a good few days to get DS to take it and we had to try two or three different brands but eventually he took to it and it was a life saver.

The "slight tongue tie" needs proper investigation by somebody who knows what they are doing.

"Slight" is often used to describe the appearance of a tongue tie. There is not a lot to see with many posterior tongue ties unless you know what you are looking for, but the function of the tongue can be severely restricted.

Appearance of a tie is irrelevant. It is all about the function.

DS1's ties went undiagnosed until he was 6yo. As a baby, he was latched on constantly for the first few weeks. He cried unless he was feeding and some days would feed 16 hours out of 24. He never came off the breast of his own accord, he was never "milk drunk" like other babies, wouldn't be put down etc etc. He gained enough weight to keep the HCPs happy, but it took a huge effort on his part to get the amount of milk he needed to gain the weight.

Everyone told me it was normal for a new baby, but I now realise that it wasn't.

You have my symapthies! My dd is 8 weeks and I felt the samd as you as from.3 weeks she constantly fed.
She became unhappier daily until I took her to a cranial osteopath at 4 weeks. The osteopath was a massive help and explained that my dd was doing more of a chewing motion that solid sucking motion, which was why she was feeding constantly (amongst other issues). Dd was also a dummy refuser but osteo ecplained it waz actually due to the fact she couldnt use it, rather than wouldnt. The tommee tippee orthodontic dummy was recommended as it has a bigger teat - which I thought was strange - but it worked! After a few tries she took it and I has helped massively!

Hang in there - it really does get better!

** was not waz!!!!