Calling all night time feeders - always up feeding when we should be sleeping! Let's keep each other company PART 2!!

[Writerwannabe83]

I think to start the new thread off we should reintroduce ourselves and our babies for the sake of our own memories and also for any newbies who may join

I have a 10 week old DS who is EBF. Has been sleeping through the night for the last week and I'm just waiting patiently for things to go downhill as I'm sure they will

My DS is the same - loves to use me as a dummy but refuses an actual dummy as he hasn't figured out how to keep it in his mouth yet!

@ Cariad

Me and DH used to have to just hold it in until he got the hang of it. At first he keep letting it slip out of his mouth but then one day he seemed to realise what to do and had the strongest suck and it became a nightmare to try and prise it out of his mouth

We did try a few types of dummy though before we found one the ones he'd use successfully. In hindsight I think the reason he struggled with some of them is because the teats were too small and so there was nothing substantial for his gums to grip

In the end we went for ones where one side of the teat is flattened. We did try the cherry shaped treats but DS wasn't interested in them at all!!

I have had to give up bf as my little man started off well but now won't sleep for 5 hours straight. Tried him on formula and he slept 3 hours, he is only 9 days old but I can't rake a 9pm to 2.30am crying. I feed him and then as doing as input him down he crys. I can't do the in bed feeding as I'm scared he will get hurt hype or my partner. I really wanted yo breast feed so sat in tears most of today. I just don't know what else to do the jst doesn't sleep at night but perfect in day time. Partner says he may not like mob but I don't want him to go in the other room without us. I need one advice from mummy's please

At 9 days old all he wants is to be close to you - can you co-sleep?

Just feed, cuddle and hold him as much as he needs and let your partner look after you!

Hello to the newcomers!

Just a quick hi - baby rolled from back to front today it is exciting but I'm scared about him rolling to his front to sleep...

At 5 days old babies still don't know the difference between night and day. It takes a couple of weeks for their body clocks to tell the difference but once they do they should in theory be a little bit more settled during the night. However it's still completely normal for them to wake up for lots of feeds in the first few weeks - regardless of how they're fed.

Hang on in there though Lisa - promise it does get easier!

Lisa I don't want to come across like the breastfeeding mafia but if you really want to breastfeed then keep at it. It takes a few weeks for your supply to get established - 9 days is nothing really and it's perfectly normal for them to wake up for feeds every 2 hours at this stage. Are there any local breastfeeding support groups you could attend? These groups often have breastfeeding counsellors on hand who could advise you.

Re the sleeping, have you thought about hiring a cosleeping crib like an NCT Bednest? You can fix them to the side of the bed so the baby is next to you but in his own space. Putting them in their own rooms isn't recommended until after six months.

Every two hours at 9 days is actually pretty good. Your baby probably just wants to cluster feed at that stage anyway - it's good for your supply.

Those first few weeks really are tough but also at risk of sounding like the breast-apo, it really is worth it to persevere. I can whip a boob out anytime, anywhere now. No bottles, no powder, no sterilisers, no washing up, no cooling in the middle of the night - just boob, baby, job done.

Hi Lisa, the fact you have been in tears shows how much you don't want to give up breast feeding. At 9 days old things are still going to be really erratic with no sense of timings or night and day or feeding patterns etc - it's just a case of somehow muddling your way through it until things ease up a little.

For the first few weeks of my DS's life he was feeding 12-13 times in every 24 hour period. It was very hard being up in the night but I decided to just stop looking at the clock as it helped me to cope better when I had no idea what time it was and also had no idea as to how long I'd slept for (or not) since he was last feeding.

I'm sure I was told there is a hormone in the evening/night time breast milk that purposely prevents a baby from going into a deep sleep and this is why SIDS rates are lower in breast fed babies than formula fed babies.

Desperation here. To make a point I have handed DS over to DH to put to bed. He's obviously making a total fucking pigs ear of it but I'm fed up with him not having a CLUE what I go through night after night after night.

I will of course have to deal with a totally over tired baby in about an hour and get an hours less sleep than even usual because it's taken longer since his feed to get him down.

Is it possible to get MINUS sleep???

This was fuelled by DH getting in from Glastonbury and buggering off to take a 5 hour nap, because don't I realise he "hardly slept last night?"

All hell has just broken loose.

Good for you mrsmugoo - I can sense your rage and that you are pissed off and let him have it!! The men really don't have a clue. DS is just about to start screaming with wind and DH is downstairs watching the TV. It wouldn't occur to him to come and see if I'm ok. When he does eventually come to bed he lies there with his Headphones in and watches films on his iPhone whilst I continue to deal with DS. Whenever DS cries my DH will rub my arm as if to say, "of you go again then" and then goes back to his film. I think the men think that because we do the feeding then it's all on us.

DS has been a nightmare this afternoon and hasn't fed properly since 2pm. He is constantly chewing on his hands but when I offer him the breast he just starts arching his back and crying. He clearly wants to latch on, opens his mouth really wide but within 10 seconds of sucking he is pulling off and crying. I have tried winding him but nothing is coming up. I don't really understand it as he hasn't been like this since he was very young.

I've now given up and realised that me constantly trying to make him feed is just making him more and more distressed so he's in his crib. I'm hoping he will go off to sleep and wake up eager to feed and do so! I'm prepared to be up in the very early hours of the morning seeing as he's barely fed tonight but there's no point me continuing this current battle.

God, I think I would have swung for him mrsm! And I'm not sure how you resist whacking your DH round the head with his iPhone when he doesn't help youWriter!

I know I've said it before but I really don't think it should always be down to us mums to settle our babies. My DH does my head in in so many ways but he has always played a big part in settling our two to sleep. DD2 is a much better sleeper than the eldest and I would actually say that DH spent way more time calming and rocking DD1 than I ever did. I basically used to feed her and hand her over for him to sooth. He spent literally hours pacing the house with her and rocking her to sleep.

I am always the one who deals with night wakings in the first instance (which I think it fair enough as I'm the only one who can feed her and am on mat leave after all) but at bedtime or a rough night at the weekend, then DH expects to play his part. I actually think he's better at it than me - perhaps because DD can't smell milk on him?

Well he finally took a small feed and fell asleep at 10pm.

We shall see what the night brings....

I did a feed and sleep diary for medical reasons when my lo was 3 weeks, I still have it, detailing how long on each breast etc! In 48 hours I fed her 40 times and the longest period between feeds was about 45 minutes.

She did to on to be diagnosed with three medical issues contributing to this (two of which are still an issue) so believe me when I say I do understand.

But what I will say is that one feed does not a whole feeding choice forever make, nor one day of feeding one way, nor even a week or a month.

Do what you do right now to cope but don't think that one formula or bottle feed means you have to change to bottles or formula, if you don't want to. Keeping going with plan a when plan a isn't going well, plan b is good, and switch back to plan a as soon as you can.

I ended up supplementing my lo with expressed milk so I was feeding as above, and pumping and bottle feeding as well, at once point she was nearly solely on expressed milk but went back to fully breastfed again - you can change any habit in a few days with a bit of perseverance. Don't make decisions on a bad day. Make them when all is good and the sun is shining, you are less likely to look back and regret them.

Everyone hang in there. I've just spent an hour wrestling a toddler who wanted to get down on the floor, so I wouldn't let her as it is not time to play, so she tried to bite me. Joyful...

Up for a feed - 2.5 hours sleep (3.5 after his last feed). He's hungry though, he's feeding frantically!

I am insisting DH sits with me for all feeds / settles tonight and helps get him back down. He doesn't have a clue!

idaclair - thanks for your positive approach and I hope your DD is well regards to her health problems. Hope you managed to get her to go to sleep without sustaining any injuries

mrsmugoo - how is DH finding the night time regime??

DS has just woken up so he had a good 6 hour stretch which I was surprised at. He's feeding a bit so hopefully whatever issue he had earlier has gone but I am starting to have worries about my supply.

Spoke too soon.....the arching, grizzling and pulling away from the breast has started again....

Don't understand what is going on here but my LO is waking every 30 minutes for a feeding tonight ?? Maybe a growth spurt?

mrsmugoo i hope Your DH is getting a better perspective of what you do and can then support you better from now onwards

Ida good advice
writer I hope you're having a good night

Sorry writer cross posted - maybe he's windy? If it's a supply thing, do you think expressing will help?

I tried expressing earlier and whereas normally I can get about 8oz in 15 minutes, this evening, despite trying for 20 minutes I only got about 10ml out. Very odd

30 minute wakings do not sound fun. Could LO be too hot??

I was just thinking maybe too cold? It's gone chilly here and he only has 1 thin blanket on....

Sounds like it could be supply.....maybe if you increase the amount of times you express that could help meet baby's demands

How's DH coping with the nighttime experience mrsm?!

We're up for a feed, quite a bit earlier than normal but hopefully she'll fall asleep again. She'd done a 180 degree spin in her cot when I got her out - no idea how as I've not seen her roll when she is awake yet

What's your concern about supply writer? Undersupply? If your DS is continuing to gain weight well and is producing wet nappies then I'm sure you'll still be producing plenty of milk for him.

Sorry - lots of cross posts!

Expressing is no indication of supply. If you're worried about supply then the best way to increase it is to offer baby the breast more regularly than normal. Maybe post for some advice from one of the BF experts if you're worried?