11 day old newborn BF issues

[mrsmugoo]

My DS was born by ELCS 11 days ago (breech presentation)

He was slow to latch on in hospital but we did manage to get discharged after only 2 nights because he would eventually latch on on average within the 6 hours they specified.

When we got home he flat out refused to latch at all which I think was because my milk came in and the different shaped nipples confused him. We spend a stessful first weekend at home cup feeding him EBM 3 hourly after a 12 hour period of him not feeding.

He then snapped out of this and has fed relatively well for the last 6 days but always struggling to latch on my left side compared to the right.

Yesterday however he just started to refuse the left side altogether but still taking the right side.

I've been expressing the left side for comfort a bit, still offering it to him but him only taking the right side.

I'm suffering from the baby blues a wee bit because of these teething problems with feeding. Because I missed out on having a natural birth I'm totally committed to exclusively breastfeeding but I just feel like I'm failing.

Any advice or support would be appreciated.

He has a good latch, midwives say my positioning is great. He's had a tongue tie snipped. I've already tried expressing a bit from the left side to make it softer for him, he took it once but has refused it maybe 10 times since.

I'm bumping this in hopes that tiktok who is amazing will see. She will have advice for you.

I only have a bit of experience and my babies were a bit older, but sometimes they favour a particular side and then go off that one and choose the other. My DD2 is currently favouring the right breast for some reason.

And you are not failing. You grew a baby and are feeding that baby, that is always an amazing achievement.

Thanks for your reply, I'm completely overwhelmed at how how emotional breastfeeding would be!

My rational mind says we are both still learning and that it will sort itself out with patience. My crazy hormonal side is saying red alert, you are failing at breastfeeding!

You're doing really well! Keep going! The first 6/7/8 weeks can be hard work, you're doing something that's new to both of you and it takes a while to establish. I had a similar problem with my son, he didn't like feeding from my right. I started every feed with that side (whilst he was more hungry/enthusiastic) but it was always short lived and I'd finish the feed from the left. I fed him until he lost interest at 14 months, the last 6 months exclusively from the one side. It was far from ideal but can be done (I'm trying to say that worst case scenario is not 'failure') I found that 'laid back breastfeeding' or 'biological nurturing' helped most with the tricky side (and was great over all). I discovered at 10 months that my son has a severe lip tie. I'd never heard of this and had had him checked for tongue tie multiple times. I would recommend checking for this as it's very common. Just google some pictures, it's easy to see for yourself - the frenulum which joins the top lip to the gum come ls right down to between where the front teeth will be (so to the bottom of a baby's gum line). I had just assumed that's what they looked like before the teeth were through so it wasn't until he got them that I noticed!
Sorry for long, not very well written post! Good luck!!!

I had issues with dd latching on the right and had to express from that side and feed her from the left, for several days. I second Trouble's advice about trying biological nurturing as a position for the tricky side.

Obviously I only have very limited experience and hopefully more knowledgeable posters will have more advice.

It sounds like you're doing great, though. I was taken aback at how emotional bf was (well having a baby too, tbh). I had panicky moments in the wee small hours where I decided I couldn't possibly do it, but it was all ok, in the end.

Good luck and enjoy your newborn snuggles!

Breastfeeding is so hard. No one really tells you that before you have a baby. I found it harder than childbirth with DC1 but muddled through & finally had a great breastfeeding experience. It can be an emotional rollercoaster at the start but it sounds like you're coping well. My Dc2 went off one side for about 5 days around the same age. I was seriously stressed & freaked out that my milk would dry up on one side. I expressed a bit to get rid of the fullness but ultimately, it didnt affect my supply. To get her back on, I tried various different positions & she did seem to prefer the rugby ball hold on that side so I did that for a while & then she gradually moved back to the normal hold. In the worse case scenario, you can successfully feed from one side only long term. My friend did it when her baby took a random dislike to one side & I imagine many mums of twins do it. Hope this helps in some way. Good luck

Thanks for your advice - I did manage to get him in the rugby ball position on the left side just once but I don't really feel comfortable in that position and I was leaning over him so it wasn't ideal - it was more an experiment to see if it was the nipple or the position that was bothering him

I really don't think he likes to take from a full breast and it seems he's decided he's not up for being tipped over to my left at the moment - fussy little chap!

We will keep persevering!

I rarely post on these because I don't feel I'm as knowledgable as others but I found feeding lying down helped a bit with my DD who didn't like feeding from one side. She had a difficult birth and I decided to see a McTimmoney chiropractor as well, that seemed to help but I know for some people they think that sort of stuff is nonsense but she genuinely seemed uncomfortable when feeding in certain positions. It did seem to help her after. Either that or I imagined it and it would've improved on it's own?

I had to express a bit off before I began feeding at times if I was too full to begin with too.

Mine are now 5 & 6 so it's awhile ago now for me. Keep persevering, it will get easier. You're doing so well.

Thanks - I haven't mastered feeding lying down yet because my c section scar is still a bit sore for that but it could definitely help, thank you for your suggestion

Have you tried feeding on the left but with babies body away from so that they are in the same position as they would be on your right? Use pillows to prop baby up slightly. Or maybe try feeding in rugby hold.

Yeah I tried that, I find the position quite uncomfortable. We managed to get him latched once but it wasn't really a long term solution.

No real 'advice' but it sounds like you are doing amazing only 11 days in. It is such a tough stressful time getting established!

DS favoured my right side when we started out and I had some of the same issues. I kept pumping on the left side (mostly for comfort) and pulled a little at the nipple to make a latch attempt easier. I found rugby hold really helped him latch on to the left side (I think possibly he had a sore head on the left side which was making feeding a little uncomfortable!)

Keep doing what you are doing and offering the refused breast at ever feed.

I really hope you get some good advice soon and have some better luck! There are days when it is so hard and feels hopeless but if its anything like DS and I, one day it all just falls into place and feels like second nature.

Congratulations on your cuddly newborn!

We spent the afternoon in bed skin to skin...we managed to latch him on the left side once but it was a real battle and I'd just expressed that side.

He's also now fussing and pulling away from the right side. I'm so upset, I feel like it's one step forward two steps back. I've got a touch of the baby blues and this isn't helping

They can fuss when they have wind and a sore tummy too. You're also probably feeling immensely tired right now, which doesn't help you to see straight

Try winding him and get your partner to hold him if you haven't eaten or had a drink for awhile too and look after yourself. You can do this.

Some babies cluster feed at night and when they have growth spurts they feed more. It doesn't mean you aren't producing enough milk.

Kellymom is a great website I used to find x

An update on this: he is now 17 days old.

Since last weekend we've had more ups and downs. After he stopped taking one side, he also stopped taking the other and I had to bottle feed him EBM for 24 hours.

We went to the postnatal clinic 2 days in a row for feeding support and both times he latched on perfectly - typical! But I did get seem good technique pointers and since Tuesday he seemed to be back in the swing of things feeding from both sides, with a little persuasion.

Yesterday we went out to a pub for lunch with some other mums and we even managed a discreet feed in public! However yesterday evening and again this morning I again had a massive battle to get him to go on the left side which is his least favourite side. Hand expressing to take the edge off and get the milk flowing, plus sometimes allowing him a couple of minutes on the other side so he isn't so cross with hunger will usually do the trick, although it has taken up to an an hour to latch on and I can't do this single handed as I need DH to hold him while I express.

He has now surpassed his birth weight, he's never had formula and does lots of wet and dirty nappies so I guess I just have to struggle on and wait for him to naturally stop this and latch properly!

Progress one step at a time. Is there a dedicated breast feeding support group or breast feeding cafe near you? Sometimes they're better than generic support groups as there is often a specialist in attendance.

Keep going, we're all slowly getting there!

Yes I'm going to start going on Mondays at the community midwives clinic

Every time I get him to latch on, even if it's been a real struggle, I think - this is a win!

To be honest it sounds like you're doing a fab job ratherthan failing! My LO is Three weeks old and we also had a terrible time of it bf'ing just after birth which resulted in a 13% weight loss and a panicked trip or to but a breast pump and bottles On day six.

Taken us all this time to get to something I consider 'normal', after a lot of expert support!

I guess what I'm trying to say is that you're defo not the only one struggling and the fact that your baby is putting on weight, latching, and feeding really well off one side and in public means you're absolutely doing everything right.

Just keep going and congrats on getting this far, it's very easy to give up!

mrsmugoo sounds like you are well on your way to it becoming second nature! Congratulations!

The first public feed is always scary! Glad to read your update that its all going in the right direction.

Happy Mothers day!

Finding it really helpful to use breast shells for my own comfort but also they seem to keep the nipple out and the milk flows better when he first latches.