What would you tell an antenatal group about breastfeeding?

[PurplePidjin]

I've been asked to talk to the latest batch of mum to be about breastfeeding. Ds has just weaned at 15 months, and according to the mw who runs our breastfeeding group I'm an expert

So far i reckon:

it's the same amount of work as Ffs but all the hard stuff is in the first 4-6 months

formula isn't poison so don't feel guilty if you need to give it, for your own physical or mental health as much as your baby's

breastfeeding is nature's way of telling you to sit and rest after birth. you have achieved something by keeping your baby fed, if you manage dressed with a hot meal on the table you're superman

anything else?

That babies often lose weight in the first week and that is normal and not a sign that your feeding isnt going to go well.

That your breasts are never really empty - like a magic porridge pot they will keep producing milk, never worry that your baby is going hungry if you feed on demand.

Co sleeping is not tantamount to child abuse as I was told at antenatal classes. Just do the research first and decide. Night feeds are a doddle if you feed lying down, everyone just nods off again!

Nursing bras can be very annoying, even if they fit. Dont spend loads of money on.nursing clothes, get some long vest tops, Pull one up and one down.

One up one down top trick. Details, with times & contact numbers for local baby cafe/ peer supporters etc. Recommendation for a local baby friendly cafe for the first public feed on your own.

Cluster/continual feeding isn't a sign your body isn't making enough milk

You get to drink a cuppa/read a book/change tv channel/use phone whilst you feed-hands free unlike holding a bottle!

Breastfeeding only works towards weightloss if you don't eat a pack if biscuits each time you sit down!

Migril, I totally hear you. I wasn't suggesting replacing lots of nursing with ff, but giving him one bottle the day before my milk came in saved us both a lot of stress (and when my milk did come in my boobs were a tad over enthusiastic and engorged so it clearly didn't affect my supply). DS is still bf at 15 months so no probs there either.

Feeding doesn't mean no meds. Just make sure that the person prescribing checks or get advice from specialist pharmacist rather than the local one.
my HV was scared by me taking meds

chocolate, you say "giving him one bottle the day before my milk came in saved us both a lot of stress (and when my milk did come in my boobs were a tad over enthusiastic and engorged so it clearly didn't affect my supply)"

That's fine. It worked for you. One person's experience is one person's experience...not something to share as general advice to a group.

For others, it can mean the end of confidence, the end of breastfeeding....and that shows up in the research, where babies who have even one bottle in the early days are significantly less likely to be bf at all two weeks later.

OP - talking to mothers about what they need to know about bf is a skill . If you have not had training in this, and the chance to really think about it, then twelve is right - stick to your own breastfeeding journey and don't for one moment imply that what happened with you is predictive for them.

Hope it goes well :)

chocolatestain, there are lots of reasons why what you are suggesting could cause problems- I'm really glad it worked for you - but isnt the best advice to give Mums I'm afraid.

Breastfeeding support works best when it is just that.
I am not saying that formula does not have it's place- of course it does, it saves lives.
If someone's car breaks down and they are looking for a fix, you could suggest the bus, but it's not really the fix they may be looking for.

Actually, statistically a supportive partner is crucial for bf success. That is, an unsupportive partner is fatal.

To buy Lansinoh and not to scrimp on it! Put plenty on and apply after every feed its a lifesaver.

That some babies feed every 40 minutes and that anything from this to going 3-4 hours is normal.

That if your in agony and exhausted, expressing and letting someone else have baby while you sleep will not ruin your chances of breastfeeding. It will give you the energy to carry on!

That most FF babies settle into a routine quicker and not to be disheartened when at 8 weeks you are still feeding on demand with no obvious pattern.

To acknowledge that cluster feeding is normal and can start in the evening and last all night long!

That a baby feeding for hours and pulling at the boob/crying is not a sign you have no milk, it's a sign of a fussy baby who is upping your milk supply.

Sorry to be a pest but Lansinoh is really only designed for moist wound healing for cut or traumatised nipple tissue.

The nipple is lubricated by special little glands around the areola and shouldn't really need any special cream unless damaged.

I would tell them to approach breastfeeding exactly the same way as labour: have a plan, make sure your partner knows how to support you, but be prepared that it may not go exactly how you want. Know where to go for help and don't be shy about demanding asking for it.

Sorry guys, didn't mean to upset anyone, but I was actually following advice in a very helpful and down-to-earth parenting book, which pointed out that your baby may be very hungry before your milk supply comes in and that in those circumstances one bottle won't do any harm. DS and I were both getting very distressed until DH dug out the book to see if there were any suggestions.
I wasn't just offering advice from my own experience, but from a parenting expert. And it's a suggestion that is clearly a bit controversial but may be useful to be 'out there' as an option for women who are really distressed in the wee small hours, as I was, when other breastfeeding support may not be available.

Agree about what to expect when milk comes in - engorgement with DC1 completely floored me - and I wish I had known it was normal and would soon ease.
In early days make sure you are really comfortable at the start of a feed even if baby is crying - you could be there a long time.
Feeding helps the uterus contract - so you may get after pains while feeding.
Let down can be like electric shocks to your boobs.
That even if you can't imagine it at all once you get going it feels like the most natural thing in the world.
Everyone has a different experience but if it goes well for you it becomes easy enjoyable and incredibly rewarding.
Very few people seem to understand BF so you need to know where to go fir information and support - Mumsnet ( and Kellymom) has seen me through engorgement, blocked ducts, expressing, thrush and carrying on feeding while returning to work. In real life you do meet supporters but also many many people who just don't seem to believe breast milk is enough - I have got really really fed up this time with people constantly implying that my DS would sleep better on formula / baby rice!
Sorry turned into a rant !

Please tell them about mastitis - what it is, what to look out for and how to avoid it.
I didn't know what it was or how likely it is at some point to get it...
When I got it I thought I was getting flu and so left off going to the doctors. When I saw her she told me I was lucky it wasn't infected.
Looking after baby is hard enough when you're well never mind when your aching all over, your boobs are killing and all you want to do is sleep...

chocolate- which book was that out of interest?

If it's the book I am thinking about, choc, the author is very far from being a parenting expert :)

thank you everyone this is fantastic

in my area, new mum are invited to breastfeeding group as part of the antenatal program - so i will only be talking to women. my partner previously spoke at one of the evening classes that are for couples.

I'll stick to my experience only. i was lucky and avoided mastitis and thrust, but did feed under exceptional circumstances - a week at my mil's while dp was in hospital having had a stroke when Ds was 5 weeks old. the medical type stuff will be covered by the mw in charge.

i know kellymom and here are Fab, does anyone have any links to online stuff? lll don't have much in the area so it's nhs or nothing.

will steer clear of mentioning formula, any ideas on alleviating the guilt of feeling like not bfax is a failure or should i avoid completely?

i'm hoping for peer supporter training but there's currently no funding

sorry, tablet broken and phone has a mind of it's own! bf and thrush

For those who are asking, it's Your Baby Week by Week, by Simone Cave and Dr Caroline Fertleman (who is a paediatrician). They do stress the importance of letting your baby nurse frequently and aren't suggesting formula instead of nursing, but rather saying that if your baby is very hungry and distressed before your supply has come in, then a couple of ounces of formula will ease their distress without replacing nursing. I actually found their advice encouraged me to keep breastfeeding as it reassured me that my body was functioning fine, it was just that my baby was ready for milk a bit sooner than I was making it, and offered a solution to the very upsetting situation of watching your baby cry with a hunger you can't satisfy.

Sorry if that's hijacked your thread slightly Purple, just wanted to explain the people who were asking.

I second what Juliet said: "Please tell them about mastitis - what it is, what to look out for and how to avoid it."

I went to a half day breastfeeding class and no mention was made of this. I ended up with breast abscesses after mastitis so I really wish I'd been made aware of things you can do to help prevent it. I went to my GP in time with my mastitis but they sent me away with a list of self-help methods of getting rid of it rather than giving me the antibiotics that I needed. Another GP then gave me antibiotics but failed to spot it had developed into an abscess, so it got much worse than it should have. If I'd been given information on this in the class I'd have been in a better situation. I breastfed through all of this so I agree with the person further up the thread that it can be done. And I'm still breastfeeding, but I'm now using preventative measures like massage and taking lecithin.

I'd also tell them about cluster feeding, which is another thing that wasn't mentioned! And definitely that the first couple of months are tough but then it gets much easier.

And I agree about mentioning that weight loss is normal; DD lost quite a bit of weight and took a while to put it back on. I found this really upsetting but the healthcare team were supportive which encouraged me to continue when it would have been easy to give up.

I'd also mention all the support lines NCT, LLL, BfN (great to check up if taking medication) Most of those should have links online.

You could mention that NCT Breastfeeding councilors are councilors that can talk not only about making breastfeeding work but also the emotions that occur around breastfeeding and infant feeding in general. (I mention NCT here because I know this specifically about them the other support organizations are may also offer this)

I wish someone told me, before I spent tons of money, that even expensive nursing bras give you a sweaty droopy monoboob look. Instead of buying those, you can buy normal supportive underwired bras and convert them. You will feel and look miles better.

i thought underwriting was a bad thing because it puts pressure on the milk ducts unless extremely well fitted?

Ffs underwiring! i promise i typed it right!

I can see the main difficulty for the OP is deciding what to talk about. Breastfeeding is a huge area, I think in a short presentation she she will hardly be able to touch on most of the points mentioned.
OP what you do have is great personal experience, I would focus on that rather than trying to explain the details of mastitis or thrush etc.
No-one expects you to be an expert and it would be wrong to give a definitive analysis and management of breastfeeding problems/
People want to hear your personal storym so make it just that- with the proviso that we all have different experiences.
I would keep it upbeat and focus on the positive, talk of your success, what helped you achieve it and what it means to you.

PS funding can be sought if you want to persue a supportive role in breastfeeding- you may have to actually find an apply for money yourself, but it is possible- many do it that way- there are ways and means.