Is it just me or are all breastfed babies cranky and miserable??

[fluffandnonsense]

Just to clarify I am hugely pro breastfeeding. I personally think the benefits to baby and mum outweigh a lot of what I'm about to say but I fin the evidence hard to dispute. To give background I fed my first child to 3 weeks and due to severe PND and massively sore bleeding nipples I stopped and bottle fed. Something I hated doing and cried non stop for days about. 2nd baby was breastfed till 14 months when she weaned but she was clingy. She screamed if I put her down, she screamed in car seat/pushchair and lived in the sling. She wouldn't go to anyone else and fed every 40 minutes day and night. Her cluster feeding could last 10 hours at a time. But I did it and I'm proud of what we achieved. My friend has just had a baby and has been breastfeeding and her baby has been much same as my DD, not settling, screaming etc. She pumped some milk and fed her in a bottle and hey presto different baby. She's now content, alert, going down for sleeps etc and my friend has decided BF is not for her which I totally understand. So why? Why does putting it in a bottle (even breast milk) make the babies so much happier and settled? All of the bf babies I've known have been constantly on the boob and unsettled. Whereas the bottle fed babies are always much
more content.

It makes me sad because I think the bf relationship is such a special thing BUT with my next child due in a matter if weeks I'm wondering if I'm just making life hard or myself?

It is the most wonderful source of comfort for a baby. Yesterday my 10 month old caught her finger in a toy box. Goodness, she screamed. Immediately stopped when I breastfeed. A few mins of breast, and she was totally fine. Awful swollen red finger though.

Not clingy at all as a baby. Despite being very small at birth and so feeding a lot till he caught up. Breastfed for a year. Slept 10-6 by 6 months and at 2 now sleeps independently. Was in a good napping/ feeding routine by 5 months. He is very good natured which helps. He almost never cried or screamed as a baby and was very easy going. He is shy and not enormously social for the first 20 mins or so but he has been like that always and I doubt the method of feeding made a difference. He has been in childcare from 7.5 months for 4 days a week. Settled quickly and goes off happily each morning. I think he might have slept through a little earlier if not breastfed but other than that I don't think his personality has any link with how he was fed.

My EBF 14wo has just stirred her stumps from a 3.5 hour nap. In her cot.

My DS (bf'd until 2yo) didn't sleep for 3.5 hours on his own (day or night) until he was 18mo.

S'just different babies.

Also while he is affectionate he has always wanted his physical space. Moreover, mine never ever cluster fed. He would feed every 2-3 hours with the gaps gradually getting longer but never cluster fed in the evening.

No, it's just you.

Still bfing 7mo. She's really calm and relaxed with others. She did eat constantly for the first few months but, just as I was about to lose my mind, she stopped and now it's wonderful

The on,y two babies I know who slept through from birth were ebf.
My dd was a non-sleeping nightmare but was never clingy, went to anyone at all, loved nursery and is the most social child ever. She never stopped smiling in the day time and screaming at night time and was ebf. I do know some very chilled ff babies and it certainly is easier on the mum if you ff and have a supportive partner or parent to help, but certainly don't think all bf babies are miseries!

Why even post a thread on this? Bfing is the biological norm, therefore each baby's character would be linked into the bfing relationship.

With ff, it's not as simple, those ff babies who are constantly palmed off to granny, daddy, auntie, cousin, etc spend much less time with their mother. Even less time if they are constantly downing bottles of formula or bowls of baby cereal to get them to sttn. The reason bf babies seem 'more intense' 'needy', etc if because most ff babies are fat & sedated & that's the truth!

Whopping generalisation made by the op, based on a very small sample of babies. I totally agree that the behaviour of breastfed babies should be seen as 'the norm' (if there is such a thing), and that wanting to be held, wanting to feed frequently, and yes, even crying, are all 'normal' behaviours, even if they don't fit with our/societies ideal of being a 'good' or 'easy' baby. I was thinking about this recently, as dd2 (6 mo, but was premature, tiny and has down's syndrome) is very chilled out and hardly cries, mainly I think because I carry her round (in my arms or a sling) and feed her every hour or so, if that's what she asks for - the fact that she has a developmental delay has really challenged my expectations around how a 6mo baby 'should' be behaving (e.g sleeping, feeding frequency etc) and made me totally focus on what she wants/needs. Sorry for the long and possibly off topic post!

MYMIL

Just

Are they still drunk from last night or something because gays the biggest like of bollocks I've read today so far.

Both my BF DC were very content babies, DS exceptionally so.

I think having such a close and natural relationship with their mother is a wonderful thing for any baby.

I think other factors, such as baby's natural disposition and quality of parenting relationship, are much more important factors in a baby's apparent level of contentment/ easiness.

Pile

No. EBF DS is happy as larry.

I am often cranky and miserable, but that's just me

Just to add, as well as sleeping well (SOMETIMES), my baby is very very sociable and spends days with dad, grandma, nursery as well as me from quite young. I work night shifts sometimes and she's fine then as well. I think it is much more baby temperament than feeding method.

I am much more clingy to my baby than she is to me

Geez I'm not hungover I just can't type. Some horrific typos. THATS the biggest pile of bollocks

Third time lucky or I'm launching my iPhone

its a long time ago, but my bf dd was often admired for her good nature. her own bf dd is good natured, too.

think about yourself after an over-heavy meal - you'd like to lie down wouldn't you? sleep a little, sleep it off? yes. that's how a bottle fed baby feels. not 'content' but weighted into sleep.

Layl talks rubbish! What utter crap that a FF baby does not have an attachment with its mother! How utterly biased and one sided.

Funnily enough ff do realise that sucking from a bottle is easier ergo we do not go around trying to force them to finish bottles and we do actually pay attention to our baby. Like if they are fshowing signs if being full we do a funny thing called stopping.

We don't sit there and pour milk down their throats in the hope they sleep.

Dd was extremely chilled out baby and she was ebf. She slept for 12 hours night from 6 weeks and hardly ever cried. not so stealth boast

Nope DS very happy and chilled out occasional clingyness but only within the realms of normal. A friend's baby was also bf and 'moanier' but she insisted on not cuddling him too much which I actually think exacerbated the moaning.

On such a tiny sample of 2 babies I can think you were only trying to start a bunfight.

My bf baby is pretty chilled. I could compare this to my friend's ff toddler who has been quite a challenging baby, but these two babies don't represent methods of feeding - they're just two different babies.

I think any perceived differences are due to temperament rather than feeding method. I definitely don't think that bote fed babies are any less attached to their parents - thinking like that should have gone out with the ark.

My DD was FF from 6 wks, due to reasons beyond my control. She was not a stuffed full of xmas dinner sleeping or unresponsive. She was bright, alert and possibly the happiest baby you could meet! I am very proud of the attachment that we share and the close bond that we have. My mother reports that I had a very similar nature as a baby and I was BF for 18 months so it doesn't all come down.to BF or FF , how you parent your baby, how much time you give your baby, so many other issues come into it. My DD did not sleep well by the way and still does not at 2 so FF is not necessarily the easy, magic cure that somehow puts your baby in a coma as some point people seem to imply. There is no easy option and as parents we do our best. (Layl pls take note). Just to add I plan to BF my new baby for as long as I can and expect to share the same bond as I did with DD1.

I don't know if someone mentioned it already, but check for tongue and lip ties (but look for an specialist, usually mws and gps have no clue about it). Google posterior lip tie and see if it could be the problem.