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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

5day old newborn screaming unconsolably

83 replies

monniemae · 24/09/2013 20:12

My baby seems fine in the day, but she's having an increasing number of sporadic, hysterical, uncobtrollable screaming starting in the evening through till 2 or 3am. I can't calm her at all. My partner can eventually...

He thinks it's normal for a baby but I'm sure something's wrong that we haven't figured out. I thought maybe we were letting her get too hungry as she roots a bit and cries but even when I tried offering the breast earlier and earlier to pre-crying cues, she kind of frenziedly roots for it but screams, won't latch, arches her back right off and away from it and screams horrifically. Sometimes for an hour or two.

Any ideas? My milk only came in today / last night. I've spent today trying to make sure she gets the hind milk but tbh my tits feel rock hard even after a massive feed.

She is calm and asleep now in sling with partner. But she is definitely hungry (I think; he thinks if she was hungry she'd feed) and if I wake her or wait for her to stir and offer breast again the whole cycle restarts...

OP posts:
Original poster
monniemae · 24/09/2013 20:13

Sorry she's actually not 5 days old till the morning. I tealise things might take a while to figure out! Just can't bear her screaming and if I can fix it would like to... So any ideas what to check appreciated...

OP posts:
nocarsgo · 24/09/2013 20:20

You know, when my newborn was screaming uncontrollably and couldn't settle I thought it was "wind" but with hindsight she was starving. I was having terrible (insurmountable, for me at least) problems breastfeeding.

So I would always assume hunger at that age, since BF isn't yet established. How has the feeding been going?

pookamoo · 24/09/2013 20:21

Hiya, congratulations on your new baby! Flowers

It sounds like colic to me.

I had a colicky baby (DD1) and she loved the sling, too. Unfortunately, there is little you can do apart from the rocking and sling wearing. You could look into crainio-sacral therapy / osteopathy, which helped my DD.

pookamoo · 24/09/2013 20:22

And the other thing I was going to say is at that age, when they squeak, offer the boob. It helps to get your supply established. You might find you need to get some support, which is totally ok, and if you google La Leche League or NCT you should get phone numbers and details of local groups you can go to...
and keep posting on here, there are much more well informed people than me around!

pookamoo · 24/09/2013 20:23

(and the rocket tits won't last, don't worry!)

Original poster
monniemae · 24/09/2013 20:27

Thanks both. Nocars, that's what two friends said, so I tried to take on board their advice today, and it seemed to go ok but once she gets upset I just can't get her feeding, she's completely hysterical - kind pf rasping/whooping gulps and really furious yelling and flailing about. Last night, my partner got her to sleep about 2 and then at 230 I got her to feed.

I think I didn't realise about emptying the breast; I was just feeding her till she came off and marvelling that it only took ten mins! which is what I was trying today, to feed till empty and keep tickling her feet if she falls asleep to get her to feed more... she fed am hour on each from 4-6 but they both feel so full and now she hasn't fed since, despite definite angry feeding cues Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
monniemae · 24/09/2013 20:30

thanks pookamoo
I just don't know how to get her on though - it seems ok much of the day but then a furious refusal to latch in evenings.. Might try and call someone for help tomorrow x

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CreatureRetorts · 24/09/2013 20:33

I wonder if she has tongue tie. Does her tongue have a mild heart shape at the end? Doesn't really poke out much? Google and have a look. Also keep her near you so she can keep all the time if need be.
My dd had tongue tie and was angry from the off. She was hungry :(

CreatureRetorts · 24/09/2013 20:35

Also is she getting much sleep in the day? Another option is she's massively over tired. Again keep her with you, don't pass her around, let her sleep on you or get a sling.

hettienne · 24/09/2013 20:36

You don't need to make her "empty the breast" - just follow her cues, when she comes off one side offer the other, when she comes off the other, offer the first again. 10 minutes then a break/swap sounds normal to me - there's no set time they have to feed for.

If you try to keep her on one side after she is finished she might get frustrated and upset. The aim is to feed frequently from both sides.

cantthinkofagoodone · 24/09/2013 20:36

Just try to remember that 4.5 days ago she didn't have to feed to fill up so she's still learning. She's probably tired and hungry. Your dh doesn't smell of food so that's why she's settling on him rather than just thinking of milk!

All well and good but she's still screaming so while the evenings are like this just tag team with you and dh andaanyone else who can help.

Rock, bounce, bath. Pram walk, drive, bus journeys and offer milk lots. I used to just sit topless and hold him in the evenings. Glamorous i felt like a chuffing cow

beachavendrea · 24/09/2013 20:36

Sorry this is pretty obvious but are you winding her enough? I only learnt to do this with my second but I didn't wind my first enough and he was miserable. Always off and on.
Also your flow may be a little fast for her so try leaning back when you feed.
I know some people think this is an old wives tale but watch what you eat. I can not eat anything spicy garlicky or with onions it really effects my ds. Heartbreakingly I also avoid chocolate and caffeine. I didn't believe what you ate made a difference until I had two awful nights after eating a curry. Never again!

MsPickle · 24/09/2013 20:42

Have you a breastfeeding support group near you? Where are you in the UK? I'm sure the power of MN will help you out...

With my two my breasts didn't start to feel soft after a feed until they had had their tongue ties snipped. They also had/have reflux but there could be lots of reasons. The main thing I've learnt is that there's generally a reason and they are often fixable! There's lots of support out there-have you got the breastfeeding helpline numbers?

And well done to you both on a beautiful baby and keep up the good work! Sounds like there's some team work happening which is excellent!

Original poster
monniemae · 24/09/2013 20:43

Thanks so much for all this. She's sleeping well in day I think. Today she slept 1230 to 3 after feeding on an off for 2 hours. Then from 3-4 fed and slept. 4-6 fed (and some snoozing. 630 screamed....

I've tried checking for TT, can't really tell but could it be that if she feeds well the rest of the time?

Figured the same with other issues eg reflux etc, if she feeds well much of the time surely it cant be something that's supposed to be universally problematic

But I don't know!

OP posts:
Original poster
monniemae · 24/09/2013 20:45

winding.... I thought it might be a wind problem so today I've been popping her upright when she drops off, then putting her back on boob a few mins later. Can't always tell if she's burbing or grouching though?! should she always actually burp?

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Locketjuice · 24/09/2013 20:46

You have already had good advice so nothing I can offer other than if you are really struggling with breast feeding don't be ashamed to give her a bottle! At the time you feel soooo guilty (or I did?) but honestly when you get a quiet happy baby it makes it worth it Smile

Rooners · 24/09/2013 20:47

Check for tongue tie
and latch

also it could be wind,

but I had a baby who did not cry, and then one who screamed a LOT and I knew somethign was up - after several weeks when he had calmed down, a HV suggested he might have had a headache from a quick labour/birth.

I don't know as I didn't have a clue before she said this and he was much happier after about 4 weeks. But cranial osteopathy often gets mentioned as working miracles so maybe this is worth a try.

Meanwhile just do your best and stay with her and she will gradually learn that you are there and there's no need to panic - I know how awful it is when they look so upset and frightened and you can't help them xxxxx

Locketjuice · 24/09/2013 20:47

Ohh and I have had 2 reflux/colic babies (one stirring on me after a 2 hour crying frenzy) and it is generally just the evenings for us :(

Original poster
monniemae · 24/09/2013 20:47

Thankyou MsPickle
So stressful Hmm
Yes I have bfeeding helpline nbers and there are cafes etc near us but I can't really walk yet (tear...)
I should get the 5 day check between tomorrow and friday so hopefully can ask the midwife.

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Rooners · 24/09/2013 20:50

when you want to wind her, try holding her face down along your arm, like a sleepy tiger...it puts some pressure on the abdomen which helps.

Or holding her with her tummy pressed against your shoulder.

Or your palm under her chest/stomach area, rubbing her back with your other hand. My screamer often seemed to calm down and stop crying when I held him face down on his tummy.

CreatureRetorts · 24/09/2013 20:50

Maybe she wants to be asleep by 6pm so try sticking her in the sling after the 4-6 feeding session then go for a walk and hopefully she'll drift off.

If she's feeding ok the rest of the time then might not be TT or even reflux, just being a young baby. I did find mine both got very wound up if they were awake too long - by too long I mean more than 45 mins in the day at a time (that rapidly changed over weeks obviously!)

hettienne · 24/09/2013 20:51

Here's some info on fussy evening behaviour kellymom.com/parenting/parenting-faq/fussy-evening/

and hindmilk/switching breasts www.analyticalarmadillo.co.uk/2010/07/foremilkhindmilk-and-lot-of-confusion.html

CreatureRetorts · 24/09/2013 20:51

X-post - I had a horrid tear and couldn't get out much :( hope you heal quickly!

nocarsgo · 24/09/2013 20:52

I do think you need BF help because I suspect it's hunger and you obvious need to get past this fighting the breast thing. TOTALLY understand about not being able to get out and access BF counsellors. It's why I gave up on day 5 tbh. I had a third degree tear and was in no fit state for anything!

Some people may baulk at this but do you have a pump? I was wondering whether some easy access expressed milk from a bottle would deal with the immediate hunger so that she'll be less frantic when you offer the breast?

Rooners · 24/09/2013 20:52

Also at about the same time he calmed down, his poo went from that seedy sort of stuff to proper smooth golden poo. I don't know which was cause and which effect! But maybe a bit of both.