I know the latch is wrong but how to fix?

[StuckOnARollercoaster]

My little 5 day old is feeding and based on previous feeds I'm starting to recognise a good latch - no discomfort and can even hear gulping/swallowing sometimes.
The problem is fixing it when the latch is bad - I pop her off with my finger but she's so impatient and panicky to get back on that she won't make that nice wide open mouth that's needed to start a good latch.
I don't know what to try - any ideas from those of you that have already been in this position?
My nipples are starting to get sore and I know I need to prevent more damage but the frustrating thing is that we have had some really good feeds but it's just luck and I don't know how to repeat them.
I can't go out yet to a support group - had a difficult labour so I'm having to stay in and in bed as much as possible. Yesterday's midwife said to do more skin to skin to calm her but it's not really changed anything. Willask again today but i just don't feel they are bbreastfeeding experts and I can't get out to a support group. Thanks in advance...

I'm sure some experts will be along soon but have you tried "squashing" your boob so that she can take more in? I think there are pictures on the internet somewhere (am one handed on phone so difficult to search/link but try the Kellymom website).

Also there are helplines run by NCT and LaLeche League ago you could call them for advice and they may be able to ask someone locally too come and see you.

It's definitely worth getting someone to visit you in person if you can as there may be issues such as tongue you're which aren't helping and MEd are bit always great at diagnosing them.

Good luck and hope you get some help soon!

MEd=MWs

Thanks magpie - I phoned the NCT helpline as soon as it opened and it was such a relief - although the poor lady on the other end that had to deal with me getting all emotional halfway through the call.
Also my midwife came today and showed me actually how to do some of the other holds which seemed to work much better. She has suggested I express at least one feed though tonight to give my cracked and sore nipples a rest - so I will do that. Unfortunately little one is underweight so she was quite keen that we try and get a decent quantity of milk into her today and tomorrow and take it from there.
I just hope that I don't undo the good work we've done so far on the breast but I hope one or two bottle feeds don't do that.
thanks again...

I know it's frustrating but it is best to keep on taking her off if the latch is bad. My ds (2 weeks) struggles to get a good latch because of tongue tie. I find offering him a feed before he is actively looking for it helps as he isn't as impatient. The slightest sign and I try to put him on.

It sounds like you are doing really well. Are you using plenty of lanolin to protect your nipples? As for expressing, I know some people don't like to this early. If you can manage without having to sit and express I would. That's just because I have never got on with it though.

The midwifes advice on lots of skin to skin is really good. If you need to rest, you have the perfect opportunity. I spent hours with my first dc just letting him feed a little, snooze a little all whilst cosiest up in bed. Don't have the luxury with dc2 unfortunately.

Just wanted to say that I know I haven't really answered your question, but wanted to let you know that you are not alone. Even an experienced second time mum can struggle to get a good latch. Hope things are better for you tomorrow.

It's a knack that you both have to learn. Frequent unlatching is frustrating for you both, but she will learn sooner than you think. Try to line her nose up with your nipple rather than her mouth to encourage a wide mouth, then latch her quickly.

Keeping getting help in RL and on the phone.

I also found hydrogel pads excellent. They are so soothing from the fridge or the freezer. Breast shells can help prevent chafing and get airflow around your nipples without having to walk around naked.

Thanks for the tips - we seem to doing better yesterday and today. Midwife came again yesterday and is happy to let us go the weekend on breast and to get reweighed on monday. As long as there has been a weight gain from Friday then we don't have to top up with formula.
We seem to be getting better and I am less sore. Will look into those shells - as I am currently walking around with my vest below my boobs and a cardi and it's not a good look!

I have a new question though but will probably start a new thread as its a slightly different topic...

Thanks again