Giving EBM to an EBF'd four week old - tips please!

[TeaOperated]

I've EBF'd DD ever since my milk came in (had to express and syringe feed first) and just tried giving her a bottle of ebm, with disastrous results.

Because I'd like to be able to give DD a bottle of expressed milk one day, my (amazing) midwife suggested giving her a bottle sooner rather than later.

DH just tried to give her a bottle of expressed milk while I flitted round out of DD's sight (well, gibbered tearfully, but that's a different issue).

DD screamed the place down, and DH felt like a murderer/baby torturer! We realised we didn't know what position the teat should be in, but even with a little milk on the end of the teat, placed roughly where a nipple would go, DD reacted like we had stuffed a random object in her mouth when she was hungry, and it felt like she was gagging - worst tears I've seen.

We tried a couple of times and then decided to shelve it for later before all three of us were in floods. She then latched on to boob happily.

Does anyone have any tips or useful links before we try again tomorrow? I'll admit I'm emotionally conflicted about giving her a bottle - wanted to cry at the idea! - and as we don't need her to take one, except for convenience, part of me is very tempted to give up....

gets large bar of chocolate for self and DH

My DD was exactly the same - breastfed happily but would never take a bottle, not even from her dad. In the end he would give her ebm from a sippy cup when absolutely necessary but it wasn't a happy experience for either of them (i.e. messy an time-consuming). Also she would never take even that from me, ever. Sorry to be less than encouraging - on the plus side, at least the breastfeeding is going well and that's a huge achievement in itself!

DD was exactly as you describe. Gagging, retching.. Just awful! Practical tips that helped were trying her with a bottle when she wasn't hungry. Letting her play with the teat in her mouth and get used to the feel. Having a wee gulp here & there without any pressure. Having the milk toasty warm, not room temp seemed to make a difference. Position wise, anything but cradle hold! Initially we kept her in a bouncy chair so she could see us. Generally though, nice and upright rather than lying down. Now I tend to hold her facing away from me initially, while am standing up so she can enjoy watching what else is going on and once she's sucking I sit her down on my knee so she can see me too.

All that aside.. Relax and don't pressure yourself. DS took a bottle happily every day from 4ish till 8 or so weeks and then never took one again. DD had taken some in the early days and then would have none of it. We've been trying off and on for months now (she's 15 weeks) & suddenly she's happily taken a bottle for the past 2 days. TBH am sure is nothing we've done, she was just ready somehow. I also know she may start refusing again tomorrow. What am trying to say is I gave myself so much stress worrying about her bottle refusing that I missed the enjoyment ofBFing for a couple of weeks. If you're happy feeding for now then don't feel you have to force the issue as is no guarantee baby won't change their mind in a few weeks anyway!

DD used to gag on bottles too (she had tongue tie which may have been connected - does/did your DD?)

We found the NUK latex teat was quite well accepted, it's very soft and also quite small. Also taking it very slowly, letting her play with it as abig says. Try it when she's only a little bit hungry - say, 45 minutes after a BF - rather than properly hungry.

Thanks all, I feel a lot better. We'll try again fairly soon after a feed tomorrow, with warmer milk and let her play a bit first. We have plenty of time - there are a couple of things coming up where it would be nice if she took a bottle, but nothing essential.

minipie no signs of tongue tie - bf going well/ now pain free, and she can stick her tongue out v far.

ok good - though, just to say, my DD could also stick her tongue out far and I didn't have pain till week 11 or so, but DD had posterior TT nonetheless! if you get any BF problems in future it's worth getting it checked (but wouldn't bother just for the sake of the bottle).

Just keep trying. DS2 (11 weeks, 3 weeks corrected) was born at 31 weeks, so I have a ton of expressed milk as he was in the scbu for 6 weeks. We tried him on a ebm bottle last week (DH giving it) and he point blank refused but then latched onto the boob happily. We just tried again tonight and he took it absolutely fine. I heated it a bit warmer tonight, which seemed to help, and he was also calmer - not quite so hungry I think. We use Avent bottles, but I kow a lot of people have good results with the Tommee Tipee closer to nature ones.

Thanks minipie, will keep an eye out.

amyboo Thanks. We have the Avent bottles, nice to know they've worked for someone!

TBH am now thinking the Avent bottles would have kept working if I hadn't moved up a teat size. Good luck and let us know how you get on.