16 week old feeds hourly, I can't cope

[MakeTeaNotWar]

DS is 16 weeks old and ebf. He feeds 14 times in 24 hours with most of those feeds at night every hour. This has been happening the past 2-3 weeks, until then he fed 2-3 times at night. Weight gain is steady, nappies fine.

I can't cope. I cry every day from exhaustion and dread nights. DS refuses bottles so DH can't help. DD is 2.5 so I can't rest in the day but I can't cope with her day time needs and am irritable with her so the exhaustion is compounded by guilt.

I am trying to ride it out but feel increasingly depressed by lack of sleep. It will get better wont it? Is this the 4 month sleep regression a bit early?

Yes, probably the 4 month developmental leap - it's not just sleep, their brains are being built at the rate of knots and this can disrupt their sleep as well as requiring loads of calories

Think of it as brain food!

But yes, it's exhausting - you will need to learn to feed lying down so you can at least doze

Hang in there

Oh god I have just been through this and pretty sure we are now out the other side. Dd is now 20 weeks today and is back to feeding 4 hourly overnight as she had been doing before Christmas. I think we hit the worst bit at 17/18 weeks and as you say it was every hour and like you I just wanted to cry I was soooooo tired. Just feel like I'm catching up now.

Look up wonder weeks. Around 16-19 weeks is supposedly a big growth spurt in terms of development and abilities, which makes them sleep less and be more clingy! Half the time I think she wanted boob for comfort of me not just food.

I posted on here a couple of weeks ago in a panic it was never going to end but I can safely say we've had 4 nights of 3-4 gaps between feeds and each night she is going that bit longer phew!

It will pass just keep feeding and cuddling and try to get someone to help you catch up sleep in the day. I feel your pain!

Sorry just saw you have a 2.5 yr old too.... well to be honest I didn't get caught up with sleep in the day as dd only naps on the move so we were walking miles as a zombie. It is amazing what your body can do on so little sleep... You will come out the other side and be totally fine. The hourly nightmare didn't last more than a week and gradually is getting better. .

Hi, my baby girl is only 9 weeks but we've just come through 2 weeks of incessant feeding that was literally driving me to the edge. Like yours she was refusing bottles therefore this felt even more stressful as I felt so trapped. My breastfeeding specialist HV knew I couldn't take much more and suggested I try a supplementer, which in all honesty I'd never heard of before. After a bit of research, my Medela supplementer arrived 24hrs later and I can honestly say my life has been turned around! She is SOOOOO much more settled, feeding every 3-4 hrs and is the happiest baby in between times which was not the case for the past 2 weeks! I honestly think she was starving during that time (but don't want to over-think it as I can't bear the guilt already). She was 4 weeks early and it seems her latch could be better as she can't open her mouth wide enough but this was only recently spotted. If you want any more info re the supplementer, please ask (don't want to preach to the converted as maybe it's only me who had never heard of them!)

Have you considered giving formula top-ups with a cup? I did this with a newborn. Could even try a sterilised sipper cup and just pour small amounts in gradually. Or try a different brand of bottle, the teats are all so different. Tommy tippee closer to nature brand are very soft and squidgy. Babies tend to sleep for a lot longer on formula and it could give you the relief you need. I know the horror of sleep deprivation.

"I can't cope. I cry every day from exhaustion and dread nights." Yes this was me with DS1. Until I introduced formula and mix fed and things got much better after this. DS1 then started sleeping through 8 hours after that.

I hope things improve for you soon.

I echo what DrMcD said. Ds is now 21 weeks and been on 3-5 hourly feeds (shorter ones now due to teethin!) The 4 month (ish) mark was absolutely awful but it did pass. Hang in there, you're doing a tough job!

I just posted this on another thread so apologise if any reader thinks I am repeating myself.

Our ds wouldn't take a bottle until my dh squeezed the tiniest little bit of milk into his cheek. It seemed to help him realise it was food and not some alien object. This has worked for us on a number of different occassions, including changing the type of bottle that we were feeding him with.

I really, really hope that this helps you share the feeding and that you get some rest soon.