How to stay awake during night feeds part 6 - all welcome to join us!

[funchum8am]

Hi everyone, cannot believe we have exchanged over 5000 messages!

mrsn when we shared our locations on here a while back, heff, goat and I all turned out to live near Uxbridge so we met up having met on here. It is lovely, if you are ever down south let us know!

macaroons sounds like we are in the same boat I officially return to work on 15 Feb but that is actually the Friday before half term so only have that day and then another week off before full time return hits. I am lucky that DH is being a SAHD til 1st July so no drop offs, pick ups or worries about the childminder ringing me because babyfunch is ill etc, and she is in great hands with him, much as I have been critical of him til we talked it over recently. However I am worried about being at work on no sleep - I will get in a lot of trouble if I lose my rag with a pupil or indeed a member of my team (one of whom is a pain). I will have to perfect the art of letting some things go (eg uniform issues in the corridor as opposed to in my lessons - I spend a lot of time arguing with pupils about these and intend to stop save for the very worst!) and dealing with others by just reporting bad behaviour to heads of year rather than dealing with it myself. I am head of faculty so will focus just on what happens in lessons in my faculty rather than working quite so hard on having the best corridor behaviour in the school in my area - it is great having that but takes a lot of time, energy and conflict so it will just have to go n the back burner until I am getting proper sleep again. At this rate dd will be in year 7 by then herself and can help me!

marbles you just described my night...thank God my mum has just arrived and is staying til Saturday. Have decided wind has been the main problem recently, the reflux seems under control....but my views on this change with the wind direction!

What a day, baby small has been incredibly bad tempered today and I don't know why. Just so fussy and not happy with anything. Am relieved it is his bedtime as the whingeing is really starting to get me down. Hopefully he'll wake in a better mood tomorrow.
I don't miss my bump heff! I was a terrible pregnant lady! I suppose it didn't help that I had a complicated one, perhaps next time I'll be better at it! Hope you had a good catch up with your friend.

Evening all, dp has just attempted to give babyloo a bottle before bed and after a few cursory swigs he then grizzled or screamed for 20 minutes before I couldn't stand it and I'm now feeding him, dp thinks he's going to have to get used to it and I agree I just wanted tonight to be an experiment to see what would happen-epic fail by all accounts. I am starting to get quite panicky because I can't see when I am going to get some sleep and when I can stop bf. I think I need to toughen up and think about going cold turkey on boobs. I'm in Birmingham all day for work tomorrow - well 8-4 which will be the longest I've been away from him-no idea how to manage boob explosions, can't pump anywhere and don't have a portable pump anyway. Need big glass of vino tonight.

Have good nights everyone and I will have a catch up on thread news at first feed.

Small, you just described our day and Susie, you just described my mood. I am going back to work in 10 weeks and having a huge panic. I have no plans to give up bf really but practically? It's going to be a nightmare if she isn't sleeping through. I'm purposefully going onto nights as she will supposedly miss fewer feeds, but I had thought she would have been sleeping through by now. I have a training day in a few weeks and have a stress on about that, even! I think that's why we've had a rubbish day; Missmarbles has actually picked up on my mood rather than the other way round. I wanted to tidy and vacuum my living room (high hopes for the day) but it literally took all day because she would barely let me put her down never mind go out of her sight. DD1 was such a little trooper when she came in from school and played with her for a few minutes so I could get the vacuum out. I know I wouldn't be feeling so blue about all of this if I wasn't feeling the return to work day rapidly approaching I know it will be fine when it comes to it. I just wish I could predict when she will eat more (solids), sleep more soundly and definitively take a full bottle of the formula at night, that I don't even want to give her!

Ok, the starlight barking is definitely back in force. Kid grizzled and screamed his way through the day... Punctuated by sudden smiles for no apparent reason, then back to grizzles, also for no apparent reason. Wouldn't be put down. Took an age to put down to sleep and is in there thrashing around in his cot. Meh. My back is protesting. My brain is even more!
We have started weaning though, and he is already a greedy little thing at day four! Sweet potato this morning, and it was like feeding a fledgling, with the gaping mouth and eager little wings flapping.

Cuddling to sleep here as DH had a disastrous attempt 30 mins ago & DS had meltdown! Don't think I can take More transfer fails tonight after today's performance (btw he slept 1.5 hours in Carseat!!! - so he does need a sleep, why won't the little scamp agree & do it in cot!!).

On a lighter note DD appears much chirpier, & stuttering less (no funny voice either). She's been waking at 3am because there's an owl twit too woo ing outside her window! Seriously its bloody loud and last 2 nights at same time! She cried tonight because she wants to see it & say hello ! X

After much debate in my own head after seeing the gp last week I decided to take the anti-depressents. I felt kind of crap about it, like I'd failed somehow but what's the point keep struggling. Having really good days but also bad ones where I randomly cry and feel I can't cope & we have a lot going on with my brother too. So, on day 3 and feeling the side effects bad mainly raging nausea, headaches, spinny head. Hope they go soon. X

Well what a day! After a rubbish night and the waste of time hospital appointment that I got up early and left my baby for, I then had the dentist. Omg I feel like I have been smacked in the gob!! The clean and scale was nearly worse than childbirth and I think she has bruised my mouth where she put the two fillings in. I then proceeded to drive out of the dentist in the wrong lane (facing oncoming traffic - luckily it was just a little road out of the car park and the man coming towards me was nice and didn't shout). Then I had the drs and she has increased my dosage of AD's. Like amey I had a dose of guilt and feeling like a failure but I want my little man to have a happy mummy! So amey and I are team Sertraline haha

marbles the prospect of returning to work is daunting, hopefully things will fall into place for you.

small and susie sorry you have had trying days! This too shall pass?

amey I took antidepressants for six months just before i fell pregnant and it was honestly the best decision I ever made, they really helped me and I found I could cope with things that I had really struggled with before a lot better so I hope you have the same experience.

Babyloo sleeping soundly so I'm going to attempt a couple of hours before first feed of the night.

Starlight barking is right goat we too had a bad day. Grizzling if left alone for a few minutes which is not like babyfunch, and positively screaming when my mum held her . And no naps at all til about 1:30 and that was all of ten minutes. Of course she then conked out properly at about 5 so will no doubt wake even earlier than usual.

so I have had about 2 hours' sleep since 0045h but am now in bed and a chain of care has been set up for the night ie me - DH - DM with clear timings and arrangements for feeds! But if she screams at my mum like she did earlier I will have to get up anyway...Gah!

I must be a bit weird and uncaring as I cannot wait to get back to work! It will mean I don't have to do night wakings! babyfunch takes a couple of oz from the bottle DH gives her night and morning so hopefully that will increase over the next 5 weeks to full feeds before I go back to work. DH is going to stay with the PILs for a night or two in my first week back and I am frankly counting down the nights til I get to then...a full night's sleep in my own bed...bliss!
I think there is something wrong with my hormones as I feel only a little bit of concern at the idea of being away from her....

Seriously, I wonder if it has been the weather making all the babies grumpy? It isn't like Missmarbles to be grouchy either.

Agree with you marbles there must be some grumpy dust around contaminating the sleepy dust we've been trying to collect, babylump's been grouchy too for a few days, although today this seems to have finally turned into a snotty cold so poor little thing may just have been feeling a bit "bleurg".

mrsn that's a fantastic way of looking at it, bump envy is one thing but even better is having your beautiful snuggly baby in your arms giving you smiles and giggles :)

funch so sorry you've had a bad day today, was thinking of you and hoping you were getting some rest. What are you doing tomorrow, I have to wait in for an eBay person annoyingly but if you want a change of scene you and your DM would be welcome to come over, I have plenty of caffeine!

I've been reading the website one of you linked to a few weeks ago (was it amey of marbles I think?) and there's so much on there that really makes me feel its ok that we are doing what we're doing, and trusting your instinct is actually ok. This one in particular is lovely for those of you still 'waiting it out'.

Had a lovely afternoon at my friends house today, she cooked an amazing curry for us and babylump was on best behaviour with all smiles and extra cuteness. Think we may have left her & her DH with a slightly over optimistic view of babies, but I'd rather that than a poo explosion on the lovely clean carpet!

Final feed before going upstairs now, please please please let this be a good night for all!

That is a lovely link, Heff. It wasn't me that linked the last one, although I did read it and I do believe that she is right and I agree. I so wish I wasn't going back to work just yet I have to go though, and it is making me sad. I wouldn't be bothered at all about still night waking (except for the knackeredness) if I didn't have to think about a routine of sorts. I said to DH tonight that I was going to try not to be stressed about this as it doesn't help and may make things worse. I am so thankful for my girls, and I just want to hold Missmarbles (and DD1 for that matter) if that's what they need. I am really feeling the pressure of returning and I don't like it.

It also makes me a bit sad about DD1, as I feel she missed out on some stuff because of being in her incubator. The one that particularly gets me, is that she never had normal feeding cues, she just went straight to screaming when she was hungry. I fed her straight away but she always cried first without asking. I have since read they don't bother with cues after a little while if they don't work. DD1's cues didn't work because she was tube fed in a box for the first 6 weeks of her life Yes, we had skin to skin and all that but what about all the times she asked and I wasn't there? She is absolutely fine now, well adjusted and healthy, but I can't help grieving a little for what she missed out on and Missmarbles isn't, if that makes sense. I guess I didn't know any different at the time, with her being my first, but Missmarbles infancy is so different to hers and it has raked up some difficult memories in a way I never expected.

On that melancholy note......
I will no doubt see you all in the wee small hours. Wouldn't it be lovely if the grumpiness was brought about by tiredness and they'd all decided to meet up and have an all-night party in dreamland

Ah marbles the lovely extra guilt of the prem mum... It's a bugger. I have moments when I am fine, then moments when I am really not. I could never do cc with Kid, as I figure he spent the first month of his life doing that to no avail But it is always lovely to hear the prem success stories like your DD -especially when I have a complete doomsayer of a FIL who insists that being a summer prem, he will struggle all the way through school and be madly behind!

amey the side effects of the ads sound unpleasant, I hope they wear off soon and leave you with the benefits.

mrsn that's really frustrating if they can't do anything for your eyes. Any chance of a second opinion maybe?

funch here is wishing you much sleep as soon as possible! Btw nothing wrong with your hormones, no one says that to a bloke who goes off to work! I think some mums need to work outside the home to be a better mum, actually, because it is so much part of who they are, and being a whole person is so important as a parent... I knew long before Kid put on an appearance that I would be one of those! I have absolutely loved maternity leave too though! (Although maybe not the night wakings )

heff hooray, you got your curry!

Lots of grizzly ones out there......perhaps it is the weather. Although baby small is such a hot little thing I would have thought he'd prefer it like this. We've had transfer fail 1 so just waiting to try again.
Lovely link heff. I still wish he'd sleep though! He's nearly 5 months and I can't bear the snatched hours of sleep much longer. If he would nap in the day it would be better but he will not. I feel sad about it but he will be sleep trained if he doesn't sleep at 6 months or I will lose the plot.

First feed of the night which for us is amazing. Hoping he will go through until 7

First feed here - so I have had 5 hours which is good!

heff thanks for the link - I will have a read.

funch I am envious of your feelings towards work, you love your job and know that your little girl will be in safe hands, never question feeling like that I am afraid I will be feeling the way marbles is, I already have flickers of dread and I don't go back until September.

amey hope you are doing ok!

Feed 3 here. It is three hours since the last one and should, should, takes to morning.

Funch nothing the matter with wanting to go back to work at all. I do actually want to go back. Eventually. Just when I'm ready and when u think Missmarbles is ready. I just don't like feeling forced into a time frame. In France you can take up to three years!! Sadly, we can't afford that at the moment, anyway, so would still be feeling the pressure but would like that as an option

Lovely link thank you heff - she has such a fantastic way with words

Morning! I thought I'd graduated this thread as DD was sleeping 9-4! But the last few nights she's waking every couple of hours . I think it's the infamous 12 week growth spurt. Bugger. Hope you're all doing well and not too tired.

Hi elvis welcome back, though sorry you've had reason to return. Hopefully it's just temporary.

Amazingly babybrain has just slept 10.30-4!! First time ever that he's done more than 4 hours (which was a one off from waaaaay back) I suspect it's a blip though Sadly it was preceded by me attempting to go out this evening and having to return after 1 hour because DP couldn't get him to stop screaming or take a bottle . DP is prone to depression and feels a right failure for not managing. Saying we shouldn't have tried as it was never going to work. I love DP hugely but it's hard trying to be a support while sleep deprived.

Agree with the mixed feelings about work. Luckily I don't have to deal with it just yet as I've no idea how babybrain would eat!

Morning, second feed here but only because dh alarm woke me and baby larle. I'd only had an hours sleep since the Last feed as dh was snoring so loudly. Very annoyed with him at the moment even though I know he can't help it. Made him take dog out so hopefully I don't have to worry about him if tired.
Anyway rant over. Hope everyone has a better day today and babies are in a better mood

Second feed here (hopefully not first morning feed as I would like a bit more sleep)!

Welcome back elvis - hopefully things will improve for you soon!

Fed again at 6.00 but went back to sleep. Up for the day at 7.20. The girls playing on our bed while I stay nice and warm in it

It's so cold this morning ! Well DS seems to be in a habit of going to bed at 8-830, bottle at 1230 ish then wakes repeatedly from 4, not hungry just wanting cuddles. I'm always so knackered I keep bringing him in bed with me cuddling him which prob isn't a good idea.
DD off to stay with grandma for a couple of nights so at least we don't be up with her too.
small how are your nights now? We've never done a dream feed but I'm tempted to try it just to see. Although I've always stuck to never wake a sleeping baby! X

Well me and my little monkey got another couple of hours snuggled up in bed together - bliss. We are not leaving the house today - second bliss!