Feeling sad

[teacher123]

DS 7mo was ebf on demand until I started weaning and I've gradually been swapping his daytime feeds for formula (not without one hell of a struggle, he's now on tommee tippee sippy cups and whilst it's not plain sailing, he is now accepting it. Until yesterday he was also eating well which kind of softened the blow of swapping him over. However he's now poorly or teething which has cocked it all up and he has no appetite for anything. I've offered him the breast in the daytime and he's refused that as well as not drinking formula or eating very enthusiastically and I'm just so worried about him :-( he took to eating so well, and the last two days has broken my heart. I don't even know why I'm posting, just for some reassurance really. He did just have a good feed from me before his bedtime and he has managed to eat some yogurts today so he's not going to starve (he's massive at 91st centile!) but he's not himself and I've convinced myself its all my fault. For no rational reason.

you silly mummy, how is teething your fault? or being ill?
my Ds1 would stop eating for 3 days, no milk either, sick, fever, apple juice only, horrible rash on bottom - then as soon as the tooth cut through everything returned to normal like that same with tonsillitis!

make sure he drinks some liquid (baby juice or water) plus breastmilk and give him calpol and dentinox teething gel - he'll get better in a few days if just teething

obviously if you think he's ill get him checked and please stop blaming yourself!

He sounds ill. Why would that be your fault? Are you feeling guilty for some reason? Sad about stopping BF?

I'm pretty sure that he's teething, and rationally I know that's not my fault! I suppose I feel sad because he doesn't really like formula, but he normally loves his food! But now he's poorly, he doesn't want food, or formula, or breastfeeds in the day and that makes me sad. I do feel very torn about giving up breastfeeding, and I am currently still feeding him morning and evening and during the night.

:(

Why are you giving up out of interest?

Work commitments. And a (probably selfish) desire to get my body back, especially during the day. But feeling guilty. As you can all see!

I understand (am on my second DC). Ironically it gets a lot easier as solids are established - at around the point that bf feels like it's all too much.

I felt exactly the same very recently with my daughter. She couldn't feed because her mouth was so sore (she had tonsillitis, teething and mouth ulcers all at once, poor little mite) and I felt so guilty and horrible that I couldn't soothe her with some feeding like I normally would. I'd gone to work and left my OH to look after her for the day because I'd already had time off looking after her myself - she fed that morning but when I got home she refused to feed and has done ever since.
I felt like a terrible mother, like I'd put work before my baby and that had led to her feeling worse.

Not exactly the same as your situation but after a week or two I felt a bit better and I can see that she is ok - hope you are feeling better soon too x

PS. I froze some milk and gave it to her as lollies, she seemed to like that - maybe worth a try? Also, it's entirely possible to keep feeding just mornings and evenings and have no breastfeeds/expressing whilst at work - your body will adapt and so will your little one.

Go easy on yourself and give him lots of nice cuddles til he feels like feeding properly again. And eat a big bar of galaxy all to yourself

Well he ate more today, with slightly less screaming...! I think his mouth is hurting and he only wants cold things, he's refused everything that isn't straight out of the fridge! Thank you for your kind words of reassurance.