DS 2wks old- just can't get it right! :(

[peeriebear]

Pretty much that really. DS is 2wks old today. I am valiantly trying to ebf! We just can't seem to get it right (and this is my third child- bf with the first two was a carcrash too, cracked bleeding nipples/mastitis)
DS just can't seem to open his mouth wide enough. 99% of the time he latches on he has his lips pursed instead of wide open. I take him off, adjust, take off, adjust... till the bloody cows come home.
The 1% that he gets a good mouthful, it still hurts.
My nipple is always flattened/misshapen when I take him off. He never comes off of his own accord which says to me that he's just not getting full.
He sucks a lot more than he swallows.
I have no sensation of letdown at all.
On Sunday DS woke up about half 7 then did not sleep ALL DAY- all he wanted to do was feed. He would doze while sucking then if I took him off, thinking he had finally gone to sleep, he would simply wake again rooting and crying to feed again. He did not sleep until after 4 o clock.
I literally feel like banging my head against the wall. I have things I need to do out of the house but the feeding is going so crappily I just want to stay at home. :(

Meant to add- I am an H cup and I can't help feeling that their stupid size is part of the problem. It's like trying to get him to latch onto a bloody cushion.

I am an F cup and I agree this makes it tough but not impossible. You're doing really well, hang in there!

Are there any issues with tongue tie that might be the cause of his poor latch?

Is there a bf-ing cafe/group at your local Children's Centre? I'd drop in on that or your local NCT/La Leche group - they can take a look at his latch and offer advice.

Good luck!

It's probably not your boob size.

Are there any breastfeeding support groups near you? It sounds like you're having more than average trouble latching which probably means that something physical is going on, perhaps tongue tie as LikeSilver has said. If you can I'd get him checked out for this ASAP because it can really cause issues and it's easily corrected.

In the meantime try biological nurturing to get the latch going a bit better - it's not very practical for out and about etc but it might enable you to get a good feed in so that he's (hopefully!) satisfied for a short while.

There's a video and loads of info on this site here:
www.biologicalnurturing.com/video/bn3clip.html

Essentially it's just lying back reclined and putting the baby on your tummy and letting them latch like that.

www.biologicalnurturing.com/video/bn3clip.html

Thank you both for replying :) I have my health visitor coming today for the first time so I am going to talk her ear off.
If I 'recline' with my boobs out they fall into my armpits :o

Sounds like a tongue tie, possibly a posterior one. All of mine have been tongue tied and every time I got the flattened lipstick shaped nipples after a feed. Thier latch improved as they got older, was only my stubborness that kept me going through the pain.

Ask for a referal to see a bfing councillor, they can help with different holds etc. Hope things improve for you soon.

Have a google of 'exaggerated latch' - basically you need to squish your boob before he latches. I squished in a bit more after he latched too. And you can pull down gently on his chin to help more slip in, rather than unlatch every time if its halfway okay. The early days are the worst. Good luck.

I have been doing all that, squishing, pulling his chin down, flicking his upper lip up, trying to stuff as much in as possible basically! Little sod. I will ask HV to check his whole mouth and ask again for info on the local bf sessions.

Sounds like it could be a tongue tie and possibly a lip tie too. You need to find somebody knowledgeable about tongue ties. Unfortunately, many hcps are not. as this thread shows

I would suggest that you contact matters who offer a virtual service to help identify tongue tie.

In the meantime, you need to do an exaggerated latch and lip roll as shown here to help get a deeper latch.

I had this problem with DS at first - I'm a double F, and he was teeny weeny at birth (prem baby) and it was a real struggle to get his mouth open enough to get a reasonable amount of breast tissue in.
It got better over time, but it definitely helped having support from the nurses in SCBU whenever I needed it - so definitely ask about bf support groups and go along for some assistance.

As for the constant feeding, that's just normal for this stage. I know it must be a pain when you already have two others to run around after, but this part won't last all that long - is there anyone else who can help out with errands while you are getting bf established?

Good luck