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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Even the bf clinic is baffled!

42 replies

Softlysoftly · 13/07/2012 23:35

Think tonight is the night I give dd2 a ff top up, after seven weeks of literally no sleep last night took me to breaking point of sleeping only 7am-8am, yes one whole hour!

Took dd2 to bf group/clinic for some moral support weeping into my tea, they looked at her feeding pattern which is basically constant unless in the car asleep and said she must not be getting enough so is snacking and unsettled, plus only pooing every two days.

Then they weighed her, big shocks she's put on nearly a pound, so ok she is getting milk. They observed a feed latch is fine she came away milk drunk deep asleep. Ok so that's fine. I then lay her down, we try swaddling, cutching in with pillows etc nope the second she moves she's alert and crying hungry. Even the fricking consultant is Hmm but she's full? Yes welcome to my life. So no advice other than try and get DH to hold her (which he can't as she screams for anyone but me).

She then finished me off tonight by not letting even the car send her to sleep so I'm done, I have to try something new and a ff it is :(.

Not sure why im posting this other than to vent. :(

OP posts:
Brandnewbrighttomorrow · 14/07/2012 00:09

Sorry to hear you're having such a rough time Sad I found with mine if they woke very quickly after a feed it was wind, have you tried burping her? Also have you tried feeding her lying down and sleeping with her, or letting her sleep on your chest? The latter not ideal long term but I found it worked with mine if they were very unsettled when tiny.

Brandnewbrighttomorrow · 14/07/2012 00:11

Also have a look at the dr sears website high need baby

IvanaNap · 14/07/2012 00:12

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn as this poster has privacy concerns.

sevenfatbubbles · 14/07/2012 00:12

I was going to say wind too. Sometimes you have to pat them forever.

Brandnewbrighttomorrow · 14/07/2012 00:15

Wonder if it might be worth trying gripe water, worked a treat with my very windy son?

Babylon1 · 14/07/2012 00:16

I would second trying a dummy, if she is full up and using your breast for comfort Confused

BUT you can't carry on this way, you know that, you need to sleep for your sanity.
You've managed 7 weeks which is fantastic. It doesn't all have to end here, if she will take a top up of ff and you're happy to keep bf as much as you can, then hopefully you'll get some sleep, and feel better.

Remember she's around the right age for a growth spurt too which could be why she wants to feed more?

MrsApplepants · 14/07/2012 00:19

Perhaps try a dummy?

Cydonia · 14/07/2012 00:27

Ah, didn't see this thread before I posted mine! You have my sympathy!

thisisyesterday · 14/07/2012 00:27

have you got a decent sling op?

we used a moby wrap and it was a godsend with ds2 who was a real velcro baby!

i would also second/third? the dummy suggestion. some babies do just want to suck on something and I think it would help you out a bit.
if it's sucking she wants to do then i'm not convinced that the formula will help, because she's clearly demonstrating that even when full she wants to nurse Grin

Happygirl77 · 14/07/2012 07:32

Just a thought - my baby has silent reflux and would feed for literally hours (the breastmilk comforted him) then sleep upright on me or in his carseat. His other symptoms were: hiccups, sneezes, lots of swallowing and gulping sounds when not being fed (in his sleep - a noisy sleeper), hating to lie flat. I'd expect some other symptoms to be honest, but it might just be worth a quick google since you're at the end of your tether? Oh and he wouldn't nap (except short periods on me) until he was around 4 months and now he needs lots of white noise (like a car engine) to settle. www.reflux.org.au/risasite/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=4:common-characteristics&catid=1:article-text (scroll down for silent reflux)

Happygirl77 · 14/07/2012 07:33

Sorry - first post do it didn't come out as a handy clickable link! Confused

blueberryboybait · 14/07/2012 07:46

(scroll down for silent reflux) handy clickable link

Have they checked for reflux? If it is a top up will make no difference to how she sleeps.

If she sleeps happily in her carseat, any chance you could put her in it for a bit in the night to get some much needed sleep.

CrazyRandomHappenstance · 14/07/2012 08:18

DD2 was like this for a few weeks just fed all the time, would lie down asleep for a minute then wake up with a scream like something out of the exorcist, turned out to be silent reflux, we now co sleep so i can feed lying down and get some sleep, she has gaviscon and gripe water and is a much more settled baby.
Don't always trust HP's either, mentioned to HV that she'd been diagnosed with silent reflux and HV asked me what that was as apparently she had never heard of it Hmm.

Happygirl77 · 14/07/2012 08:24

Thanks Blueberry Smile

I meant to say that if it is silent reflux (silent is where the stomach acid comes up but goes back down again so you don't see it hear it, unlike reflux where babies throw up) there is a lot you can do to manage it. GP can give you some meds to help make baby more comfortable and you can raise the head end of the Moses basket, etc to help too. My ds is now 6 months and unrecognisable from the frantic, screaming, exhausting newborn he was! Hang in there.

pantaloons · 14/07/2012 08:33

My ds was like this, I ended up giving him a dummy. I'd got in my head I really didn't want too, but it was just the comfort he needed and it never left his basket/cot.

midori1999 · 14/07/2012 08:37

OP, that all sounds so difficult, lack of sleep is awful. Sad

Can you clarify, will she sleep after a feed if you hold her instead of putting her down?

I ask as DD would not be put down, even in her pram, for around the first three months. She did go to DH at first, but then stopped that, but we just insisted in the end as I needed to shower etc and she quickly got used to him again. I've never lefther to cry, but I knew she was fed and changed etc and figured that crying for 5 mins while she was held and cuddled by her Daddy, who she did know and I had a quick shower was not the same as leaving her alone to cry.

Would you consider feeding laying down and sleeping/dozing at night? This absolutely saved my life with DD. We also used a Moby Wrap so I could get things done, I could never feed in it until DD was much older, but plenty of people do learn to, so this might be something you can try too?

Original poster
Softlysoftly · 14/07/2012 10:02

Thankyou all sorry only just came back on, well after a total meltdown last night the news is I have slept!!

DH stayed home from work last night, I fed DD and fell asleep in my chair, DH stayed watching us, I remember him waking me when she stirred for a feed that's all. Until he eventually woke me properly saying he was going to bed and our toddler was awake, it was 9.30am!!!! I can't believe he stayed up all night to let her sleep on me.

So that's it, can't be hunger no f required she just either can't or won't lay. Flat away from me (we have tried to give force her a dummy and she has rolled to her side since birth).

Im going to go research silent reflux and high need baby links. Thankyou.

Midori she does sound identical I can't co sleep though due to my weight, mattress (pillow top) and DH lost a brother to SIDS so it just too scary!

OP posts:
AlmostAHipster · 14/07/2012 10:08

That's a good man you've got, right there!

CrazyRandomHappenstance · 14/07/2012 10:09

What about something like this op, www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Troll-Bedside-Cot-Crib-John-Lewis-No-Reserve-/330756862013?pt=UK_Baby_Nursery_Furniture_ET&hash=item4d02a5303d it would mean you could feed lying down and have a cuddle but you wouldn't have to worry about the co-sleeping.

BlameItOnTheBogey · 14/07/2012 10:09

One other thought; I had one like this and posted on here in desperation. Some posters suggested allergies and I dismissed it. She turns out to have a severe cows milk allergy and was reacting to the milk in my diet which was giving her tummy pain. I don't understand why but she was fine when being held upright but not in the cot/ car seat. Maybe try and eliminate things from your diet and see if that helps?

Good luck, I remember the hell that was that period in time and I feel for you.

BertieBotts · 14/07/2012 10:15

FWIW it's normal for them to only poo once every few days, if she's more than a few weeks old.

The other stuff sounds hard, though. What about a bedside cot?

midori1999 · 14/07/2012 10:37

I can see why it would be extra difficult if you can't co-sleep. I know a bedside cot wouldn't have worked with DD, but it might be something you can try?

Otherwise, how about a rocking swing? I'm not sure if they're a great idea for long periods of time, but most are a similar position/recline to a car seat and the movement might settle your DD? It might be good for you to get a bit of sleep here and there? I did seriously consider one, but we were moving and the one I wanted was out of stock everywhere, so we didn't get round to it.

It does get better if you can hang on in there. With DD it was quite sudden. I remember her napping (only for ten mins, but still!) in her bouncy chair at around 2 1/2 months old and sending a photo to my DH.

Your DH sounds lovely! Smile

nextphase · 14/07/2012 10:52

Sounds horrendous for you, and I thought my boy didn't sleep, but at least he managed 40 mins at a time! What an amazing DH you have!

The thing (and its already been mentioned above) that gave me the ability to get things done in the day was a moby wrap, or a http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Victoria-Slinglady-Stretch-Wrap-Sling-baby-carrier-suitable-birth-EU-TESTED-/110841129010?pt=UK_Baby_Carriers&var=&hash=item5f7b3cef83#ht_13106wt_1166 victoria sling lady cheaper, but imho not as good, stretchy wrap.

When he was tiny, I could literally carry him around all day, and apparently you can feed from them, but I never managed that.

Nights, well, we co-slept, so I've no advice there.

Hope you get some more sleep soon

XXX (in a very un-mumsnetty way)

crikeybadger · 14/07/2012 15:48

How was her birth softlysoftly?

Just another thought to throw in, but sometimes if babies have had a forceps or ventouse delivery, they can end up a bit out of alignment (and in pain). Some people find a cranial osteopath works really well.

Cydonia · 14/07/2012 15:57

That's interesting, I'm having similar problems with my DS, though not as serious, and he was a ventouse delivery as was back to back. He hated lying flat at first which we put down to his head being sore, he's not as bad now but we use a wedge in his cot.