DC2 due in three weeks, what do I need to know beforehand?

[MrsChemist]

I tried to bf DS, but I'd had pethidine during labour when he, so he was drowsy and uninterested in latching on for the first few days. The hospital wouldn't let me leave until he'd fed, so I just gave him some formula because I wanted to go home so badly.

I struggled at home and didn't really have a clue what to do. The community MW seemed happy that I was mix feeding (expressing) so didn't really give me any information about support.

I managed to mix feed for about 5 weeks until my supply went to shit.
This time I'd like to make a success of it.

Basically I went into it pretty uninformed and unsupported last time, so it wasn't really much of a surprise that I didn't manage it. I want to be armed to the teeth this time with information about support and positions to help bf etc. etc.

Thanks!

My top tip is to ask for help until you are confident. Despite having fed DD1, I needed help with DS and stayed in hospital for 3 days ( the break was lovely and got help at every feed.

I don't think there is much you can do to prepare....

find a good bfing counsellor in yr area and get them to talk everything thru with you, and get them to do a follow up after baby is born. A doula might be able to help you also if they are bf trained. Definitely getting someone who specialises in bfing to talk to you and sit with you to show positions, common mistakes etc. will make all the difference to yr confidence. It was 5 months before I found a counsellor whose advice I trusted and the doula I picked was on her recommendation. I feel better already about the thought of bfing knowing good help will be at hand. Hosp midwives are often inconsistent with their advice so I really think a visit from a counsellor will be better for getting started. Good luck! Also you can google breastfeeding videos on youtube.

pop them on the boob at every available opportunity. But. If you even think the latch is not quite right take then straight back off and try again.

I did this and found that we got lots of practice at perfecting our latch. Taking them off doesn't feel mean if they were last on fifteen minutes ago so you can be tough and get it right, minimising nip damage.

Plus the lots of stimulation helps get your supply going.

Get the latch checked tons but remember mw's are sadly often poorly trained on bf so make contact with a bfc as soon as poss if you suspect a problem, or before.

Good luck.

First of all here is a list of national support groups, I would recommend making contact before you have the baby as it makes things much easier.

Also it is a good idea to have plenty of skin to skin contact with your baby after delivery, it really helps kick start their natural instincts, and try to feed straight away.

Also there is an alternative to Pethedine in labour called Meptid, which is a synthetic form of Pethedine which doesn't seem to make mother/baby as drowsy.

some great websites to look at kellymom
and Dr. Jack Newman

Good luck, be confident :)

P.S do I remember you from Sept 09 thread??

Find out where your local bf support groups are and go to them now while pregnant, make some bf friends and go when LO arrives.

Have the bf helpline numbers easily to hand.

Remember it is NORMAL for your baby to want to be feeding almost all the time sometimes and this doesnt neccesarily mean there is something wrong.

Sore nipples are a sign of a poor latch, not somehting that just needs to be worked through, so if you are sore get some help with latching (by help I mean proper knowledgable and experienced help not just any mw/hv who often dont have much bf training).

The more you feed the better your supply so any formula will impact this so try and avoid if you can.

Make sure your DP/DM/DSIL/whoever may be around knows you want to bf and how they can support this i.e. by looking after DC1/doing baths/fetching you drinks and cake/cooking meals etc, but suggesting you use a bottle cos DC2 wants feeding 'again' isn't supportive.

Try and master feeding lying down and cosleep.

Get the paed to check for tongue tie while you are STILL IN hospital, and really insist they check properly, make sure they know what they are checking for, if they dont, ask someone else.

Sorry for the massive post, HTH. The most important of this list I think is to have some support, so that is DP and family/friends and a bf group.

Thanks for the replies.

I might be pro-active and ask the community MW for any contacts she has when I have my appointment with her tomorrow.

I know there is a group that meets up every week at the local sure start centre, but that's no good to me if I have to wait a week for help, so I'd need someone who could possibly come to see me (or I go to see them) as soon as possible.

I think having a look at some biological nurturing info might be useful.

Funnily enough I was just looking at some articles on it written by Nancy Mohrbacher here.

kellymom.com
drjacknewman.com
are also good to have a look at

You might also like to consider finding your nearest bfing support group which you can attend before the baby comes. That way, you know what help is available. You could search here for one.

Good luck with everything- you'll get loads of help and support on here too so stay in touch.

Sorry, I just about x posted with everybody.

crikeybadger great minds think alike

are we actually the same person!

All above advice is great - just wanted to add that just because DC1 wasn't interested it doesn't mean DC2 won't be. I couldn't feed DC1 for love nor money - he just wouldn't suck despite loads and loads of support in hospital and at home. I ended up going the same route as you - mixed (expressed) feeding until about five weeks when everything dried up!

When DC2 was born she latched on like a trooper - I was gobsmacked! Got all fingers crossed that the same thing happens for you. :)

On a more flippant note, ten years later I often think how their early feeding experiences reflect their personalities - DS (1) is lovely but possibly the laziest and most single-minded human being on the planet - once he decides that something is too much effort he digs his heels in BIG TIME and refuses to co-operate. After years of blaming myself for 'failing' at BF I've finally shifted all the blame onto DS - bf was something that was a bit tricky to get the hang of and frankly, even at a few hours old, he wasn't going to 'waste' his time trying. :o In contrast DD (2) - the big sucker - is endlessly enthusiastic about everything, never ever gives up and NEVER EVER refuses the offer of food.

It's not scientific but I think there may be something in it...

We have a council/nhs sponsored bf service here called mum2mum which uses a few employed people but a lot of (trained) successful bf mums who man helplines and do visits on request.

They are actually quite pushy and are v keen to come out to visit even if things are going well. I have so far had one visit, but numerous phone calls to check that I don't need more help. DS is 18 days old!

When I did get my visit (at 5 days post birth) the lovely lady took one look at me, said our latch was very good, but that our positioning needed adjusting slightly. Within 2 days my sore nips were 100% better and other than the first pain of attachment and let down, bf is no longer painful at all.

When his weight flatlined between 7 and 11 days, as well as excellent advice here, I got fantastic advice from them on the phone. It all worked and now his weight is going up again.

This is dc4. I'm finally hopeful that with this (last) baby I might make the 6 month+ mark. Who knows, I might even make it to a whole year!

Thank you again everyone :)

Yes twinklegreen I was on the sept. 09 thread, though DS turned up two weeks early, so was an August baby in the end (the cheeky monkey)

:) thought I recognised the name! my September 09 baby was my last
Good luck with the new arrival