5 things I wish I'd known before I started breastfeeding

[twinklegreen]

just reflecting really.

What things do you wish you'd known before you had your baby?

Mine are;

1. the tingling sensation when you get a let down, as it describes in the books, can actually be quite toe-curling, and is completely normal.

2. It can take up to 7 days for your milk to come in.

3. the REAL experts in breastfeeding hold IBCLC or Breastfeeding counsellor training. Midwives and HV's often have very little training (Even sometimes if they are an infant feeding co-ordinator) and often give out incorrect or out of date information and advice. :(

4. You should try to feed your baby as soon as possible after birth, not wait until someone gives you permission. :)

5. The smell of EBF baby's poo is actually quite addictive

Anyone else?

Sorry, haven't read all posts so bound to be some repetition.

1. HV/ MW's often have very little experience of BFing and don't know much- ignore them.

2. Don't clock watch. Babies know when to feed and how long to feed for- just let them do it.

3)Just because you are not feeling full/ leaking/ able to express DOES NOT mean you don't have enough milk. Wet nappies/ some periods of sleep are all you need to see, ignore anyone who says otherwise (Someone will definitely say 'are you sure you have enough milk').

4)Don't worry if you have no routine/ still feed to sleep/ still feed all the time- it will sort itself out.

5. Other people will have an idea in their heads about when it is appropriate to stop. Often, this will differ from when you choose to stop. Some of these people will then decide that continuing to Bf is 'about a need in you'. These people are idiots. Ignore them!

I loved my floppeze pillow and so did my son! Excellent for breastfeeding, when he was small and a great help when he started to sit up. A must for any new mums! x

Press down on the boob to break the "air lock" I've seen new mums hauling a nipple out and wondering why it's agony.

Nothing better than having a breastfed baby to keep mil at arms length.

I had very supportive health visitors who told me to go to bed for the weekend with my daughter and feed non-stop. I was so tired it seemed like a good idea and when they next came to weigh her, I had increased my milk supply and she had put on weight.

Of course I didn't stay there all weekend, I got up and went for a walk with her in the afternoons. Well it was summer!

Fear not the nipple shield if you have got into difficulties and are so sore you feel like giving up. This saved my bf career from doom and I was soon able to do without them and continue for a year.

I didn't realise that:

• It would be a real shock. Not at all what I had expected and involving a lot more initial discomfort/embarrassment/pain/tears than I could have ever imagined.

• Any of the initial difficulties are soon overcome and it's so, so, so worth getting past them. Breastfeeding after six months is just lovely.

-That everybody has such strong opinions (and plenty of ridiculous, unfounded advice) that they feel they should share with you, and that it doesn't stop until you stop. They are impossible to educate!!!!

-Once your baby is past 12 months, people become (weirdly) disapproving. IGNORE THEM if you can.

-That it is an incredibly intimate, enjoyable and lovely thing that you have just between you and that baby. I feel like it's establishing our relationship for the rest of both our lives.

it can take up to seven days to come in

it can hurt to begin with, end of. I dont buy the "if it hurts you are doing it wrong", bollocks. both time it killed for the first week as baby was sucking so hard and milk had not come in

that breatsfeeding covers can be very useful if you are not comfortable feeding in public, a life saver for me

thats its OK if they feed hourly when very small

that they may never ever poo and thats OK when EBF

That sometimes they just want to feed all the time. Don't try to fight it, just go with it... this too will pass.

Oh and that you won't necessarily get sore nipples, I never did and had no problems whatsoever. It can be a really easy experience... it just seems that all that's reported are the problems.

[smug]

Make sure you have a decent chair. 8 weeks sat on the edge of a squashy sofa really didn't help. A proper nursing chair (eg Dutailier or similar) was one of the best buys have ever made.

Good thread...

1. That babies can sometimes feed for a few minutes and be satisfied, and that other times always when you have somewhere to go they can take an hour or so. Both are perfectly normal!

1. That I would have such a forceful let down and could easily soak anything within a 2m radius if DD or DS latched off at the wrong time

1. That breastfeeding takes time to establish for both mummy and baby. The first few weeks are the toughest, in terms of demands, pain (God, the afterpains - why do we not have G&A for those?!) and sheer tiredness.

1. That I would end up feeding DD for 27mth, I honestly thought DD would happily self wean at around 12-18mth, I really had no idea! DS is 10wk, so I may end up feeding him for the next 2yrs as well...

1. That, once breastfeeding is established, it can be a wonderful experience for both mummy and baby!

For me that it was right to ignore all those healthcare professionals who said DS had a slight tongue tie....no one was cutting anything on my PFB. He's fine, talks wonderfully and it was once his mouth got bigger that BF got easier and the first few weeks were definitely tough but normal.

That the baby doesn't know how to latch on - they never had to do it before.

That NONE of the 18 people telling you to breastfeed will be able to tell you how to get the baby latched on.....

That instead they will say 'they have brown fat, they live off that for the first few days' while your baby is screaming and screaming and screaming

That to get the baby latched on (got shown this by our wonderful post natal midwife):
Express some milk onto a clean finger
Put in baby's mouth to get reflex action going
Take your nipple between index and middle finger and put it into baby's mouth
Baby will latch on like a clamp and you'll crap yourself

I'm the exact same as you Count Bapula, spend the odd spare 1/2 hour I've got on a pump and can't get more than an ounce or 2 expressed. Tried it regularly in the beginning but was just the same. And she guzzles that in seconds! Also 10 months old.

That you will regularly want to kill people out of sheer tiredness your baby's cuddles while you feed will make up for the sleepless nights

1. Ignore the 'nose to nipple' bollocks - the nipple goes in baby's mouth, not it's nose!
2. That babies don't get nipple/teat confusion if you give them a bottle sometimes as well.
3. Not usually one for books but get 'What to expect when you're breastfeeding and what to do if you can't" by Clare Byam-Cooke. Lots of very good common sense advice (including points 1 and 2)
4. If you get mastitis a second time, forget the massage with warm towels stuff, get some antibiotics and if it's still there in a couple of days, get yourself to a surgeon. I didn't do these things and ended up with a breast abcess which needed emergency surgery leading to a two inch hole in my breast that needed packing with sorbsan every day for a month. and yes it is as painful as it sounds.

5 Looking at your baby, or if baby not there, a photo of your baby (while in hospital after emergency surgery for example) really does help let your milk down when you have to express (to prevent engorgement while in hospital after ....etc ). I thought it was old wives tale, but it actually works.

1. Co-sleeping and feeding your baby is an absolute doddle!
2. The sound and look of a contented feeding baby is a delight, I even get emotional looking at Pigs feeding Piglets at petting farms!!
3. You can eat whatever you want!
4. Just wear a normal bra and hoick it up when you need to feed - easy.
5. It stops them crying, solves problems in a second - amazing.

that just because it hurts doesn't mean your baby is not getting enough milk and will not end up in hospital being fed through a tube.

that a multitude of HCP will give you different and conflicting advice until your head is spinning, you don't know what the truth is and you will no longer trust your instincts.

that you would get so confused and sleep deprived that you wouldn't believe it was working even when you could see and hear your baby gulping the milk down.

that formula is not poison and if you have to mix feed for a while in order to feed your baby and remain sane, the world will not end BUT

that your baby could forget how to latch on after only 3 days of bottle feeding EMB and would take over a week to relearn.

that you would spend an arm and a leg on paraphernalia to get you through the first few weeks, that once BFing was established would gather dust in a corner.

that you would have to try out 5 different types of breast pump to find the one that worked for you (and that one would make your nipples bleed!)

that despite it being a nightmare that took every ounce of grim determination to get through, it would be TOTALLY and UTTERLY worth it.

(i hope my post doesn't sound too negative or scary for people who havent BF yet, it's cathartic for me to write and I want to clarify that we had several unusual circumstances colide to make things rather more difficult than 'normal')

I've successfully breastfed a teeny prem baby and a whopping great 10lber, the experience was very different for each. If you have a baby in an incubator get on the pump at least every 2 hourly during the first days and set an alarm to pump after 4 hours sleep in the night. Seeing your initial drips of milk feeding your tiny baby through an ng tube makes you feel worthwhile as a mother even when you can do very little else for them.

Sorry, but Clare Byam-Cook's information is out of date and packed full of advice detrimental to successful breastfeeding. I cannot stress just how important it is for mums intending to breastfeed to avoid her books.

More helpful choices are: Bestfeeding or The Food of Love or The Womanly Art of Brrastfeeding

I love this thread here we go:

1. It is not instinctivee.
2. Most people struggle with it.
3. It makes no difference what sort of birth you have - you are either the sort of person who will love it or you are not.
4. It is bloody hard work.
5. The closeness you feel when you are doing it is extraordinary and all the negative points make this one positve thing worthwhile.

Forgot: the only way to get a good night's sleep is to perfect the sleeping on the side position and co-sleep.

What a wonderful thread. I think everything I would have said has been covered already. I would reiterate however that...

1. Formula is not poison, and the occasional bottle won't hurt.

2. Nipple shields helped me enormously with DD, however she forgot how to latch without them after 3/52 and I had to use them for the next 8 months. No big deal, just a bit of hassle making sure I always had sterilised ones with me when out and about.

3. I hated having to lift clothing to get to my breast, (holding it under chin to keep it out the way while I'm using 2 hands to latch/feed) - can highly recommend BOOB label clothing, cheaper on ebay... so discreet no-one realises you're feeding.

4. It's different for each mother and each baby... but the toe-curling silent screaming pain when latching is abnormal (I just thought I'd forgotten how painful it was with the first child, but DC2 had a posterior tongue tie; painful latch improved considerably after having it snipped).

5. Enjoy it. It's the most natural thing in the world, and a chance to sit down and relax with your baby. If you're tense the baby feels that and it makes it harder.

OOh and also definitely keep going to breastfeeding clinics / counsellors. I'm going each week at the moment as DS gets heavier and latch changes. Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself!

nobody told me that your periods stop (or rather don't return); now having bf for over 6 months and beyond must have saved small fortune in formula and sanitary towels!

1. That Lanolin cream will save you from suicide in the first few days. And
2. (related to 1) that breastfeeding does bloody well hurt at first because neither you nor your baby will get it right all the time and there will be nipple damage in the meantime, so that it hurts even when you are getting it right. Ignore the advice that if it hurts at all you're doing it wrong - it takes a while, and even then you'll have the odd painful latch which eases a few seconds into the feed.
3. In the end your baby will work out what to do, more or less, and that will be a big relief.
4. 'Biological nurturing' is a crock of crap . Your baby will not climb up your body and latch on hands free, and it is not a 'foolproof' method of BFing that nobody could possibly get wrong. Unless I am a total fool (with two bleeding nipples ).

BFing is awesome for mother and DC but DPs can feel a bit excluded from things. It's not something that you can necessarily do much about but I wish I'd realised how miserable my DH felt (or that he'd told me, the emotionally-stunted-numpty!)

DS is now 2.7 and DH only very recently told me that he was really afraid that DS wouldn't love him as much as he did me because they wouldn't have the same sort of bond.

Oh and BFing is great if you're a lazy mare like me. No crappy paraphernalia to lug around or clean, just a nappy, wipes and a sick rag in your bag! And no stressing about running out of formula if you're out.

And a bit of breast milk will clear up a gammy eye in a NB; magic stuff.