Is there an 'extended' breastfeeding support thread?

[Unrulysun]

Or would I be better off on LLL?

Just read the 'school-age children' thread with interest but didn't want to derail :)

dd is 1 today so it's not 'extended' bf by any normal definition but judging by the number of 'Are you going to carry on breastfeeding her?' (yes because otherwise she'll be composed primarily of grapes) conversations I've had inflicted on me in the last week I think I'm going to need all the support I can get

so proud we made it this far - ha ha!

Thanks AngelDog, they can't argue with data !

I need to train myself to say 'it's because I'm (breast)feeding DS' when I can't handle certain chemicals at work, not 'it's because I'm still (breast)feeding DS'.

Hmm, is it enough to say 'I'm feeding DS', or do I need to be more explicit and say 'I'm breastfeeding DS'?

I tend to say 'I'm feeding' - people usually look blank for a moment, then catch onto what I mean.

Another vote for the poorly thing - DS had a pulled elbow (ouch) and when we were waiting in the minor injuries unit he screamed all the time he wasn't feeding. Great for teething pain relief too.

I think I'll say 'I'm breastfeeding DS' then. I'd only blurt it out during any ensuing silences anyway.

Can I please join in :) Started typing a big message last night then lost it. Havent had time to read the whole thread yet.

My DD is almost 14 months old and feeds morning and bedtime. I am now back at work part time, so on my days off she will occasionally ask for a feed during the day but this is happening less and less. I still feed on demand, its just that she doesnt demand it alot anymore! My DD is now sleeping through most of the time till 6am-ish. She did this on her own - a few months ago we tried sleep training because I was so exhausted but we all found it too upsetting and my DH has always been of the opinion that she would sleep through when she was ready and he was right!

I experienced a lot of negative comments from family when my DD was really young. My family are not against bf but they knocked my confidence big time by saying things like..."she cant be getting enough?" etc. Over time family members began to really support me. However, now that my DD is passed the year mark I have had a few very direct "stop feeding, she doesnt need it" comments. My mum never bf me or my DS and at the start she constantly questioned if my DD got enough milk from me but now if I even mention stopping or refuse my DD a feed if we are somewhere awkward my mum immediatly encourages me to keep feeding, which is great.

Anyway sorry for the long post but Im glad there is a thread now as I was about to start my own thread with a few questions...is it ok if I ask...

• my DD is allergic to milk and eggs but loves soya milk. What are calcium levels like in breastmilk? Im a bit worried that she isnt getting enough calcium...only because she doesnt get cowsmilk which we arent really meant to drink anyway!

• When you leave your DC (past a year) do you still express and leave milk? I cant get anything when I express now so just leave soya milk.

• Im having a few supply issues at the moment as I had a tummy bug about 4 weeks ago and couldnt feed my DD (I was stuck in the loo) so since then my supply at night has been abit rubbish and my DD isnt really patient enough to suck to increase my supply when there isnt alot of milk there! Any tips Is fenugreek an option this late?

Sorry for this HUGE post :)

jaggythistle Where do you think I got the nn from ?

hi there I am still feeding and co sleeping with my twins who turned 3 years last week.

harverina - I've never left milk after a year. DD is 2.5 now and will v occasionally have a cup of cowsmilk, but it's just another drink, not something I give her regularly.

haverina - Kellymom has some info on calcium - bm has less than cow's, but the bioavailability is much higher (similar to iron). She says there's enough calcium in bm, although there's also a list of other foods high in calcium.

haverina calcium levels are perfect in BM. Give it not another thought :) If you want to give other calcium rich foods, dark green leafy veg is good, sardines, that kind of thing. Soya milk can cause problems with kids who are dairy intolerant (but not sure about allergic, which is different).

How long do you mean you're leaving your DS? Generally over a year they would be fine with their alternative drink if it's a few hours or a day.

Not sure about fenugreek but the NCT line will be able to answer that.

twintwo how did you find the BFing newborn twins? Did you get much help?

Haverina - I have never expressed successfully so basically didn't leave her for the first 4 months, then left cartons of formula and from about 10 months just let granny give her cows milk or water in a beaker.

Can I please ask those of you who are tandem feeding or are pregnant (congrats!) - had you stopped night feeds, did you have your periods back etc? DD is 13 months, still co-sleeps and feeds through the night, no sign of a period - am wondering how I will ever get pregnant again?

TheCountess I'm 19 weeks tomorrow and DS still pretty much helps himself through the night. (We've had a few unsuccessful attempts at night weaning so far) I got my first and only period when DS was about 12.5 months and only, I think, because he had a couple of nights of feeding a little less. I was lucky enough to fall pregnant that same cycle. I hate my period.

Some people find that they need to night wean or significantly reduce feeds in order to regain their periods but the longer you feed for the more likely it is that you will ovulate before your first period.

As always there is some information on Kellymom about breastfeeding and fertility.

I briefly returned to work about a month ago and sent in EBM for DD as she was refusing to drink either water or cows milkand getting v constipated (we think because she wasn't getting enough fluid). But I did think it was a bit of a nonsense expressing for a 12mo.
I have a stash of EBM in the fridge and am considering weaning her onto cows milk in the afternoon by mixing the two and gradually upping the ratio of cows milk.
But a part of me thinks why bother, I've got milk on tap. I would just like her to at some point drink something other than bm and the odd sip of cows milk.

When DD was in nursery all day I would fetch her at 5pm and give her a bf before taking her home. When I first spoke to the nursery about this I got them all confused because I said 'can I feed her here' and they thought I meant solid food, not bf. So I now actually say breastfeeding rather than just feeding.
That probably makes v little sense but I know what I mean!!

Wow, so many replies!! Not sure if I can keep up....

GeneCity - I would be inclined to put it the other way and say something like "my son breastfeeds so I need . Or maybe even less info like simply "I am lactating, so need..."

TheCountessOlenska - I didn't conceive ds2 until I stopped nursing ds1 during the night. This was around age 3.5yo. I was utterly, utterly sick of him waking in the night for milk. I can't remember the stratgey for getting him to stop, but it was gentle I'm sure. I conceived during my next cycle.

haverina - ds1 was also allergic to eggs, and was intolerent to cows' milk following a nasty bug not long before his 2nd birthday. He was able to take goats milk for a while, but had another upset which left him intolerent to that as well. I was concerned about calcium, but after reading some stuff about it, was pretty sure that he was getting enough from my milk.

Re calling it nursing vs breastfeeding. I just remembered that I have seen the WHO recommendations ie exclusive for 6 months then alongside food for at least 2 yrs and as long as both wish, described (can't remember where, sorry)as "optimum breastfeeding" which I quite like, but am well aware that people would take the huff at that phrase, in the same way they take the huff at "artificial feeding". Hey ho...

Goodness! this thread has grown!

Read a few of the posts relating to the twiddling and Dd did do that some years ago, but after some perseverance on my part, I got her to stop. It drove me bonkers! funny because when a distant memory man 'plays' with them, it's actually a nice sensation, but entirely different and unpleasant when the Dc does it . Ds never did that at all, but I only fed him for 18 months.

I got funny kinda looks or worse ~ horrified looks when I told anyone I still fed him at that age and my Mum was the one that got me to stop...I was ill though (beginning of ME ~ didn't know) and she was concerned for me which I appreciate, but kind of resent now. She tried on a number of occasions to get me to stop nursing Dd from around the 18 month mark until I told her in no uncertain terms that she should stop telling me that as I'd make the decision myself. I had no bloody idea at all that I'd still be going with it at nearly 4 1/2 years though! In fact, I was one of those that said that any Mother still bfing past the age of 2 was doing it for herself! ashamed? me? yes and I apologise profusely, but that was said out of ignorance and I now know better don't I? because Dd has taught me that :)

That's a good idea mawbroon, I'll say 'DS breastfeeds' rather than suggesting that I do .

I'm suprised at all the negative reaction to extended breastfeeding.

My mum bf my brother for 2.6 years and 3 dd form betweem 2 months to 6 months. Then my sister bf her first for 3.6 years and is now feeding twins. All my family are very supportive of bf, even my 73 yo dad. My MIL bf for 2 weeks and thinks she did very well. She didn't like it when i was bf DS at 2 years and said if he hasn't got the goodness now he will not get it! I told her it was between me and him and he is happy with it. My MIL mum at 94 yo is very supportive and thinks its great that i'm still feeding. My DH is also supportive.

Also my period started when my son was 13 months but it had totaly changed to before i was pg. I was not sure i was ovlating and it took us till he was 2.2 before i got pg again. But i have PCOS and with co-sleeping we only had every other sunday when DS was at inlaws for sunday lunch to try

I was feeding son about 6-7 times in the day and about 2 times at night. Now its rear that he feeds at night and if he does its only for a minute or two to go back to sleep and in the day about 2 - 3 times. When he is ill he will feed more but its good as it gets fluid into him.

My he was a newborn and under 1 i would feed him in the brestfeeding room in the local shopping centre, most places have a room for feeding mothers. Or in the back of the car with privacy glass in. On the obb occation i did feed in front of other people no one said anything/or i didn't notice

Oh also my son is a twiddler and he is still as bad today. I just can't stop him and it drives me crazy.

To top it off my DH when flirting with me once twiddled and said he was deputising for Son as he was out

TheCountessOlenska - re: TTC, I've found that it varies from woman to woman (and each woman's return to fertility can vary too).
My experience - I had no periods between babies. None of them had night-weaned when I got pregnant/periods returned. DS1 was 8.5 months when I got pg with DS2. Nursed til I was 4 months pg and he was a year. DS2, at 11 months was very much still nursing and cosleeping mainly when DD was conceived. I tandem nursed him and DD until recently. I think he may have stopped he's 4 in 2 weeks. DD is 27 months and still cosleeping, still nursing through the night, still nursing lots in the day. Especially if we are at home and I sit down. I spend most of my time standing; I put the fact that I have returned to preDS1 weight (around 8 stone) down to this and the fact that they all pinch my food.

"I spend most of my time standing"

How exciting that there are so many of us :)

Do those of you with children who want to feed a lot during the day find that they're not very interested in solids? Do you try to increase solids and decrease milk or feed on demand?

DS2 and DD didn't get interested in solids til around 12-14 months. DD still doesn't eat masses but they both would eat fruit til it cam eout of their ears. I have to limit it.

Do you stand lots too OCC?

I have a 12mo DD (on Thursday) so I think I count as an 'extended' BFer now. Unruly pointed me here from another thread My mom has finally given me an almost dressing down for Still Breastfeeding.

After this week, I'm not expressing any more. It will be a relief not having to sit still for half an hour every morning to get just 2oz (it's been dwindling for a few weeks now, it used to be 5oz). DD really hasn't caught onto cow's milk - will she be ok just having morning and evening feeds? I'm tempted to try and day-wean her on my home days too to avoid confusion, I'm sure she'll be ok as long as she has plenty of cheese/yoghurt/water won't she?

Maybe I need to stand all day to put her off

Can I join in too! Just read through the whole thread, and find so many familiar tales. Ds is 18 mo, and a nipple twiddler when I let him. He also "milks" me when I let him, and unlatches and waits for me to squirt him in the eye, which I started doing when he had a gunky eye and now he finds hilarious

Up until 15 mo he was co-sleeping and bf throughout the night, but I was exhausted because he pummelled and wriggled and scratched, and I also would like to get my periods back an ttc number two. So, we night weaned, following the Dr Jay Gorden method, which went well. He know sleeps in his cot for an average of 8 hours, then comes into bed with us. So I'm happy .