Yesterday I was in the same room as several mothers who nurse their school aged children

[Babieseverywhere]

This was the annual LLL social coffee morning for nursing mothers of children over 4 years old !
It was so nice to discuss the good and bad points about nursing older children. :D

Roll on next year :)

I stopped BF many years ago (around the age of 1) my children are still BF and jolly selfish of them it is too.

LeninGrad , Ok, I shall expand, and expect the full wrath of the exrended BF lobby as everyone else who has said they are uncomfortable seems to have been hounded out.

I think it is slefish putting a child in a position where they will remember being BF. Lots of people say there isn't an issue with remembering BF, that is thier view. My view is different.

Actually I think people would say if they felt scarred by extending feeding. It would make a brilliant true life story book
' mummy . Put your nipples back'.
They could have a picture of a six year old, head in hands. Bestseller - got to be.

but you don't remember toddler so how could you know how it feels to remember? And to just dismiss the feelings of those who have done and do remember as 'they would say that' well, it just means you go round in circles

I am not part of a lobby.

I don't like clubs. I just do what I chose.

I don't think those uncomfortable get hounded out do they ( rarely in bf/ffing topic much). Isn't it more that their argument is pretty much

1 but it's icky
2 er. That's it

Pagwatch

I don't think 'where do I come from' questions are the beginnings of sexuality.

It's not the questions that I see as part of the beginning, it is more the answers I am thinking of! Unless you are my parents and say you come from the faries in the ballody cave.

Bloody cave, not ballody cave.

Sigh, this really isnt getting anywhere is it?

tiktok - I mean she's a tutor. And I'm not getting starry-eyed. And what I meant about it not being a big deal is 'let's not get into a to-ing and fro-ing argument about it'. If only because we have anti-ebf people on here to bash!

But you could say that a two year old knowing she is a girl and her brother is a boy is the beginning of that. Or knowing at 18 months that mummy is a woman and daddy is a man.

But it also links breast feeding and sex. Which I simply can't accept is a link.
All my sisters and I just fed our children when we needed to. The men in our family group did not race from the room for fear of arousal because it is not a sexual act. If men and women, teenagers and children, can separate the act of breastfeeding as a simple part of mothering, why is a breastfed child going to have huge confusion?

that's the question ~I would like an answer to Lenin. Since apparently those friends of mine who remember and say they aren't bothered are lying

Aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Jesus, I have tried to play nicely with you. It was an EXAMPLE of what I originally said because if I hadnt offerend a bloody EXAMPLE people would have jumped on me and demanded 'explain yourself'. You are trying to twist my original comment into me making bf into a sexual act, and it pisses me right or when people do that.

So, for the record:

BF is NOT a sexual act, but to me it is inapproprtae to BF to a point when children become aware of sex. An EXAMPLE of this would be when you ANSWER questions about where children come from

Lenin and WoTmania - I personally suspect that at some point in an adults life the memory of BF would be less then appealing. Whoppy bloody doo if your friends have told you otherwise, however thats my gut instinct an I am sticking to it.

I think you may want to go and lie down a while

Shouting and sighing and argghhhing is a bit childish really. Why are you over reacting like a toddler.

Is it all a bit much for you ?

I don't see what the problem with remembering is either. I don't remember being breastfed but I've seen photos and I don't feel remotely uncomfortable about it.

If someone came on here saying they felt uncomfortable seeing a baby being formula fed/it's all about the mother being selfish and putting her own needs first, they'd be torn apart! Yet some think it ok to say these things about breastfeeders.

At risk of sounding odd, I wish I could remember being breastfed

I never felt loved or cherished by my mother, she was stingy with hugs and a very closed person

my father was absent and my stepfather a very cold undemonstrative person

I spent my teens craving physical comfort and accepting it from all the wrong people because I felt unloved and insecure

I don't want my children to feel like that. I want them, as adults, to have those very definite memories of being cuddled and nurtured and treated the way a baby and young child should be treated. I imagine that is children do have breastfeeding memories, they are precious and treasured and intimate but not in any way embarrassing or shameful. They will have grown up feeling that physical closeness is normal - which is should be. People sustain and express love using their bodies. Thia is a wonderful thing and it saddens me that anyone would consider that wrong or paint it as something horrible

No need to shout :)

BUt why is it a problem that people remember? And why would the answer to 'where do I come from' involve breasts? Apart from in a 'that's where you recieved nourishment and comfort after you were born type way?

Pagwatch - do get over yourself. I tried to be bloody civil with you specifically and YOU wouldn't have it, so dont try and take the moarl uppe highground.

Why on earth would you involve your breasts in an explanation of sex to a 5 year old? "When a mummy and daddy love each other very much, daddy fondles mummy's breasts and..."

but why would telling my five year old that she came out of my tummy make her link breastfeeding and sex ?

I am notbtrying to talk you into feeding btw.

I am just trying to understand what your point us.
I confess I remain baffled.

Do you want to try again.

A five year old links breastfeeding with sex because.......

'Whoppy bloody doo if your friends have told you otherwise, however thats my gut instinct an I am sticking to it.'
That's reasonable - just ignore the people who've been there and done it and go with your own 'instincts'.

And now I am buggered whatever I do. If I leave it here I will be accused of flouncging, if I stay I will just have to repeat myself over and over. :rolleyes: .