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Due SEPTEMBER thread 12 - the big countdown ...

451 replies

franch · 16/08/2005 21:44

Here we go

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
milward · 26/08/2005 13:00

pc - was actually feeling tearful last night that this school holiday is nearly at the end & it will never be the same again. Things will change for good with little one but just that the whole dynamic will alter. Last two summers have really been boot camp for me looking after 3 kids with just dh to help. This one was easier as dds can play together (sometimes!!)

KiwiKate · 26/08/2005 13:05

PC - know what you mean about the end of an era. My DS is 2.4yo and I'm suddenly panicking and thinking that all is going so smoothly right now, how will adding a baby to the mix disrupt things?

Serves me right for being smug about getting an early night. Couldn't sleep, and now its after midnight here, and not at all tired (but no energy to do anything constructive either EERRRRGGGGGG).

Hope those with sick littlies get some rest soon (and that the toddlers get better soon).

bubbles2904 · 26/08/2005 13:21

kiwikate, hope you get back to sleep soon. it's mad to think of the difference in time between us all. i'm feeling really fat and fed up now, but managed to have a great sleep for the first time in months last night, think the rain hitting the window really helped though.

zubb · 26/08/2005 13:27

PC - I know what you mean! I'm more worried about how ds2 will react than I was with ds1. I think it's because ds1 was much more independent than ds2 seems to be, even though the age gap is exactly the same (22 months). Ds2 is much more a 'mummys boy' at the moment, so we have been encouraging him to go to dh more over the summer. I know it will all work out OK - with ds1 there was no jealousy at all, but I'm still a bit apprehensive. With ds1 last time we spent as much time with him as possible, and involved him a lot in what the baby was doing, and I tried to get out with him on his own while dh looked after the baby between feeds.
I am keeping the boys with their usual routines when the baby arrives, so ds1 will go to pre-school and then the childminders, and ds2 will be at the childminders as usual.

bubbles2904 · 26/08/2005 13:57

definetely a bug going around. my dd has just complained of feeling sick. no news on rz yet, it's been a while since she posted.

Redhelen · 26/08/2005 14:14

zoezebra * Milward - oh no sick children on top of late pregnancy (fingers crossed ds dosn't get it - hes a terrible patient (men!)

Feeling very positive about the labour - unless I wake at 3/4am (happens most nights) when I feel terrified!!!

I think I have baby names sorted - however dh has never actually said yes I agree too - he just nods for a quiet life!

DS wants to call the baby Brian - regardless of sex! umm!

Arabica · 26/08/2005 14:15

Just dropped in to wish everyone all the best for September...good luck!
love Arabica (ex Sept thread member--it seems like ages ago now!)

zubb · 26/08/2005 14:21

Arabica - how are you? hope things are going OK.

pooka · 26/08/2005 14:35

Hi there Arabica, good to hear from you.

bubbles2904 · 26/08/2005 14:40

hi arabica

RedZuleika · 26/08/2005 15:58

Hello hello - I'm still here (waves at Jessysmummy) and I haven't popped. I've just had some awful appointments with consultants, which have stressed me out and made me inclined to bury my head or head for the hills. It's also a cautionary tale regarding checking which orifice your doctor is speaking out of before believing a word they say...

This could be a long post.

I saw a different consultant last Thursday - but only because there were no ultrasound appointments available in three hospitals and she was the only person who could do it. I initially thought she was nice enough, but the more I think about it, the more I realise how manipulative she was. She asked me if anyone had discussed the risks of a home birth with me, given my 'high risk' status - and said that people with antiphospholipid antibodies are usually induced between 38 and 40 weeks - and definitely by 40 weeks. She then said that I was at higher risk of pph (eh?? aren't I a clotter not a bleeder???) and the peanut of intrauterine death. We asked her what the statistics are on this, but she couldn't provide any - but then went on to say 'Of course, this IS your FOURTH pregnancy...' and 'It is a PLANNED pregnancy...' What the hell difference does that make? I'm not sure that someone who has never had a miscarriage, or has reached this point in an UNplanned pregnancy would sit around thinking 'Never mind, I'll just let it die, I can always make another...' if there were strong evidence to suggest induction at a certain point, due to placental insufficiency.

This consultant had the cheek to say that - whilst I couldn't use a birth centre (tell me something I don't know...) - I could have a 'low intervention' birth on the main ward and I didn't have to have an epidural. Thanks a lot. How they expect someone to labour effectively without painkillers when they've barred other methods of 'natural' pain relief (eg birthing pool), I really don't know. Not to mention the fact that epidurals are strictly contraindicated when you've been on heparin due to the risk of bleeding into the spine.

Besides, as I keep ranting on - part of my thinking in trying to have as active a birth as possible, and trying to reduce my chances of a Caesarean, is that by keeping mobile, I reduce my risk of dvt.

As suspected, the growth scan was fine - and the one thing that my midwife would have found useful (exact current position of the placenta - last seen anterior, not low) wasn't recorded.

Anyway - I was fairly upset by this whole conversation, but my gut feeling was that in the absence of firm information, I would decline induction before my due date - and base my decision thereafter on facts presented to me. We asked this consultant for facts relating to intrauterine death with my condition, but she couldn't find any to hand, said she would look on the internet (like I can't do that myself?) and give them to the midwife present, who would be at the ante-natal clinic at which I had my next appointment this week.

I took my blood pressure and pulse before going to the appointment with my own consultant and the former was sky high and my pulse - usually 60-something - was 104. So - really - the stress isn't doing either of us any good.

Despite the first consultant going on about how it was my decision etc etc, she'd written across the scan report 'Recommend IOL by 40/40, discuss with Mr X'. Amusingly, when my consultant saw this, he went off on one about how he'd only sent me to her because she had a skill that he needed to use and if he'd wanted an opinion, he'd have asked for it (the implication being that it will be a very long time indeed before HE goes to HER for advice...) and if she's going to make comments like that, she should really have all the information and statistics at her fingertips.

He also completely slated the advice given to me by his registrar a few weeks previously about when I should finish the anticoagulants (now extended to the beginning of labour, recommencing afterwards for six weeks), saying that he doesn't hire these people, he has no control over them and that this particular registrar should know better.

He also confirmed that I could have a natural or managed third stage, if I wanted, and there are no implications thereto with the antiphospholipid thing because I AM a clotter, not a bleeder. Which also means that the consultant who did the scan was also talking rubbish.

He doesn't approve of the home birth plan - but then I never expected him to - but restricted his comments to a statement of fact and three lines in my notes. Bless him. His concern with regard to myself is that I apparently need to be monitored for clots. How they would intend to do this in hospital without comprising my movement and therefore making clotting more likely, isn't clear to me...

Have just seen my own midwife again (now back from honeymoon) and feel more relaxed given the monitoring she can do - and the fact that she can do blood tests for me at home. She is of the opinion that I shouldn't attend the next appointment with the consultant (scheduled for 39 weeks) on the basis that that is not a time I should be waiting hours in an ante-natal clinic, getting stressed out. My husband is of the opinion that we should just accept monitoring because it doesn't do us any harm. US?? Might not do HIM any harm...

The peanut is currently 1/5th engaged and still in a good position. I'm getting a lot of discharge too. This is good, right ?- it means our cervices are thinning. Also having a certain amount of mild crampy type sensations - the kind you might get if your period was going to start tomorrow, for instance.

I'm convinced - for no good reason - that peanut will be a girl. I don't have a preference either way - but somehow it's just fixed in my mind that it's a she. We have names sorted for either though.

Congratulations to the Hals!

I'll shut up now. Except to say that my grandmother died at the weekend as well at the age of 84. Very sad for my grandfather obviously - they met when they were 16.

Redhelen · 26/08/2005 16:41

Oh no RedZuleika sounds like a nightmare. Sad about your gran & grandad too- together for 68 years!!

Must go ds is in the fridge!

andif · 26/08/2005 18:44

Hi all! Thought we might have another baby today but not so far. Just realised sarahal was due on same day as me so feel very excited.
Took the kids to Regents park open air theatre today - booked it ages ago, but have been worrying all week that it was a bit ambitious at 37+wks. Had a great time, but exhausted now! Baby got its bum stuck up under my ribs during performance which was v painful and I couldn't jiggle around enough to move it!
All those worried about the 'end of an era' - we really felt this when we had ds2. You can't imagine ever loving another baby as much, but trust me, you do! I feel better this time as I feel the boys have each other and maybe understand a bit better than toddlers do (although you wouldn't guess this at the moment from our 8 yr old's behaviour!!) I do feel very protective of them though and keep refusing friends' offers to have them for the day!!(am I mad?-probably!) Something to do with nesting and wanting my brood around me I suppose.
On names, we have agreed for a girl (although MIL trying to manipulate dh to change middle name - it won't work!!) but dh still won't discuss boys! There is one possibility, but it's a bit unusual and there's a baby with the same name at school so it feels a bit copycatty! I'll just have to hope the scan was right, or have a nameless ds for a few weeks...!

andif · 26/08/2005 18:47

PS those with kids with bugs - think positive!! If you get it, it will probably induce labour at this stage!!
Sorry if this sounds offensive, it just happened to a friend of mine and she was delighted!!

franch · 26/08/2005 19:04

Goodness, too much to read through as usual but CONGRATULATIONS Sarah & MrHal!!! Just updated the stats thread

Pool is assembled and it's HUGE! Can't wait to go for a dip

OP posts:
LadyLazarus · 26/08/2005 21:25

RZ - good to hear from you, sorry things are not great for you. Try not to let things get you down. Crap things always seem to happen at once don't they! Try to focus on the positive things - like you say you are having crampy pains, which is a good sign!

Is anyone else just feeling totally drained? I admire those of you who have to look after other kids... I can't seem to even look after myself this week! I'm just exhausted. Debating whether or not to go to the meet-up tomorrow as I'm just so tired Had an Hb test a couple of weeks ago, but didn't hear from them so I assume it's ok (previous two were fine).

Redhelen · 26/08/2005 21:34

Hello LL

I was thinking I was the only one at home on a Friday night! Like you I have no energy or drive to do anything (except eat ice cream!) Strangly except for today and I've been quite energetic- been out most of day with ds - fear I'll pay for it tomorrow!

Had cramps and back pain earlier (ye ha!) then it went!

milward · 26/08/2005 21:40

rz - sorry to hear about your gran. Sounds like you're having a tough time with your medics as well xxx
andif - lol at inducing labour - just imagining myself arriving at the hospital in my sick covered clothes after cleaning up all day. Plus phoning my friend & asking her if she could collect my 3 kids - one of which is throwing up!! Sure she'd be delighted.
LadyL - when I was preg with dd1 I slept & relaxed through maternity leave (apart from moving house). Make the most of this time - people told me this & I just thought fine. But it's true you'll never have this much time again to yourself - enjoy.

Katts · 26/08/2005 22:05

LadyL, I'm thoroughly confused now. Isn't the meetup on Tuesday the 30th?

RedZ - sorry to hear about your grandmother and all the hassle with the consultants. I think you're doing the right though in only listening to actual facts.

LadyLazarus · 26/08/2005 22:40

Katt - you might be right! Good job I didn;t go for tomorrow!!

Katts · 26/08/2005 22:47

Ha! Thought it was me. Have a cold now - which I think really is unfair! And can barely construct complete sentences.

Also was last day at work today and it seems no one even bothered to send the obligatory card round to be signed. Uhhhh...thanks for the well wishes guys.

mummyhill · 27/08/2005 10:10

Hi arabica - Thanks for thinking of us. Hope you are well.

RZ - Sorry to hear about your gran. Sounds like you are having loads of problems with your medical team, stick to your guns especially if they aren't giving you any solid facts.

To those of you with sick children my symapathies it is not fun dealing with this at our stage of pregnancy.

Have woke up this morning with a headache, the trots, sick feeling in the pit of my tum generaly cr*p. Have been having fairly regular but very mild contractions since first thing this morning but no more painful than braxton hicks. I am hoping that this means that bean is going to arrive before the end of the bank holiday as DH and mum won't have to be called out of work!!!!!

Redhelen · 27/08/2005 10:59

Katts - sorry last day at work wasn't what it should have been.Think I could have a cold too!

Spent most of last night in tears - work up this morning with swollen glads in throat, really achy ears and completely blocked nose! Going up to the hospital when dh gets back - not sure if I have the lurgy or if this is hormone related!!!?? Made an early morning heavy breathing call to the mw!
mummyhill - good luck hope these are early contractions.

sarahhal · 27/08/2005 11:18

Good morning, hope you are all well.

Just a quick post to let you know that we are all well here and that Thomas is gorgeous.

Well we were just enjoying Chinese takeaway on Wed pm about 8.30 when aware of a teeny bit of waters breaking then very very mild pains. Things stayed very non eventful until about midnight when contractions started to be stronger. Took DS to my parents and got to delivery suite about 1.00am - only 1cm dilated still by 1.30. I was convinced they would send me home so was relieved when í'd got to 4cm by about 2.30am. I was managing pretty well on gas and air and felt so much better without pethedine this time. At 3.15 í was struggling to cope with the pain so they started making plans for an epidural but when they examined me i was fully dilated and ready to push! It was all very quick then and with the help of an absolutely wonderful midwife Thomas arrived at 3.32am. I couldn't believe how quick it all happened - my first labour had only been short so I was disappointed when this one looked like it might drag on!

After all my fears about the birth it was such a different experience to my first. I think the worst bit really is just not knowing how long you will have to cope with the contractions - once I knew the end was in sight it was so much more manageable. I felt a hell of a lot more in control without pethidine and limited my use of gas and air to stay with it.

So it's all go here now - having a toddler makes it much harder work to cope with lack of sleep but we're getting there!

Haven't had time to catch up on your posts but good luck to the next September (!!) mum! Can't wait to see who it is.

milward · 27/08/2005 13:20

Fantastic news sarahhal - so pleased that everything went well - well done!!! and welcome to the world Thomas xxx