Due November 2009 - we just can't stop chatting!

[BeckyBendyLegs]

A new thread!

helips have a good week in Devon, get lots of rest.

We're off camping in Shropshire for the weekend. Fingers crossed for good weather.

Hope you all have a great weekend! xx

I've ordered one of the natal hypnotherapy CDs as my doula recommended it. I'm still a bit dubious about it, but let's be honest, I'm absolutely bricking myself about the prospect of labour second time around - the first time, I was quite excited and full of anticipation, while this time, all I can think is 'Don't want to do it, o God, do not want to do it...' At this point, I will take whatever help on the relaxing front that I can get.

The consultant I saw said that roughly fifty-percent of first-time labours needed some sort of intervention to get the baby out. I suppose this means that come December, half of the first time mums here will be saying 'I knew I could do it!' while the other half get to have a nice chunter about how much fun forceps are.

I've got to say, I don't think my body had a clue about what to do - when birthing instincts got handed out, I suspect mine had bunked off behind the bicycle sheds. You're supposed to stay active and upright when in labour to help the baby down and out, but all I remember wanting to do was curl up in a foetal ball on the bed and cry, which is not an easy trick to manage when nearly 42 weeks pregnant. Note, people: do not do this. It does not make it feel any better! Anyway, I'm just hoping that something clicks this time around.

ninjacat et al, I'd definitely go for the hippy b*llocks if I could afford it. I was very scared and panicky last time and I can imagine that made it all worse. The only thing that might put me off is that idea you've failed if you need drugs. I did need drugs last time, and can't imagine this time is going to be any less painful!

katster music is definitely allowed. I found it quite helpful, or at least a nice disctraction. Bring your own, so you don't get stuck listening to Celine Dion!

helips and ursigurke have fun in Devon!

we have nothing planned for the weekend except DH doing a charity bike ride on Sunday, and our laptop is still broken, so I will be MN-free until the library re-opens on Tuesday. grrr....

Tamlin I feel exactly the same when thinking about the birth, mine was actually ok, but im more anxious now i know what it is like and what happens.

Tamlin 50%!! Really? Ooooh, that's a scary number... I'd rather not think about it and just carry on stroking my hippie-book that tells me to speak to my ladybits and tell them to open up and get the job done.

Laugs Thanks for reminding me - I'd forgotten it's a Bank Holiday! Ha, that means DH has time to paint the kitchen! (And I swear, that'll be the end of my ridiculous nesting!)

Katster Just spoke to my friend, she says she's really impressed with the book (but after having chatted to her, most of what she's read in it is exactly the same stuff as I've just read in the Ina May book ie trust your body, it's made to give birth, and fear=tension=pain etc AND it seems that at least with that particular HB method your birthpartner needs to be very involved even in the reading, listening and above all practicing as there's lots of bits like "and when X happens, your birthpartner will do Y and remind you of Z" or "when your birthpartner places their hand on your shoulder you will" so I guess it all depends on how involved your DH is likely to be with the preparations? (If it helps, I think that particular method is called Mongan method or something like it.) Certainly won't be much use in our house... but as I said, I'm Ina May all the way until I discover it doesn't actually work and beg for an epidural.

Broodzilla, I was thinking it was quite a cheering number - 50% are going to get their babies out without needing instrumental or surgical help! I think that's pretty good, actually..?

Am really glad it's a Bank Holiday, as DH is catching the red-eye out of New York tonight, and tomorrow DS is going to hit him like a small and enthusiastic scud missile. At least this way, poor DH is going to get an extra day to recover before having to head back into the office...

I hope all those of you going away for the weekend and next week have good weather I am so glad it's a bank holiday weekend. DH has been away all week but is on a plane back now so it will be nice to actually see him!

I have finished work!!!! I am so happy! I will miss the little ones but not having to get up early every day and not finishing til 6 every night will be lovely!

Got letter from hospital today to say my consultants appt is next week! I thought it wouldn't be until I was about 34 weeks (am 29) so not sure whether to be pleased or concerned! I guess pleased as it means I will know what is happening sooner rather than later. Have to go to a different hospital as my local one (not actually where I am having baby but do everything but) hasn't an appointment soon enough as the midwife wanted me seen straight away! Wonder what they will say .

Still struggling with names so if anyone fancies popping over to the 'baby names' section I have a post there looking for inspiration!

Oh yeah, also wanted to say that I've never really been into all the hippy thing, but if was to help (and I had the money!) then anything is worth a try!

I like all this talk of positive attitude towards birth. I totally believe that to be true. You can do it! Defo! I am the biggest scardy cat when it comes to pain, illness, the lot so if I can do it (three times) then anyone can. Really I am not eggagerating I am a wimp!

The Shrewsbury Folk Festival is on and the DSs and I have weekend tickets. We had a great afternoon in the juggling tent messing about. Nice not to be camping though - just had a hot bath

I have to totally agree here, having an "I can do it" attitude to birth helps so much. I managed to aviod pain relief with the last 3 just by concentrating on my breathing, didn't have any classes or anything about it but if you can really focus on just breathing properly it helps a ton.

Gives you a focus rather than just thinking about the pain, the more you think about the pain the more you fight it as it's your bodys natural response thus the more it ends up hurting.

That probably sounds like total twaddle but it's true

Saying all that though doesn't mean I'm going to feel any better about it once that 1st contraction hits....

Does anyone else's bump get hiccups constantly? She seems to get them 2-3 times a day and it's a tad annoying! Although dd loves putting her head on my belly whilst baby has them, so cute!

Have just ordered this "CDwww.relaxedparenting.co.uk/services_links.html"
Will let you know what it's like when it arrives.
BBL I am reading the Little Stranger and although its quite easy reading I'm a bit bored. Does it get good and scary near the end? I just don't seem to feel much for any of the characters at the moment (about half way). I'm a bit suspicious of that dr

EasyEggs cross posted. Hope things have eased a bit.

I just re-read 'We Need To Talk About Kevin', because clearly I'm in a masochistic mood. I read it first when pregnant with DS, and it did give me pause for thought - especially the bit where she talks about prenatal testing, and observes that there is as yet no test for innate malice.

Ok, in honour of this thread, I'm off to watch my NCT birthing DVD. I remember being convulsed with laughter while watching it last time around, wonder if I'm going to find it as funny this time..?!

Man, all this positive birth talk is great, but I'm afraid I still have this innate feeling of resignation in me that all isn't going to go to plan with me again this time. Maybe I should read some of these books/listen to some of your CDs. I'll put that on my List of Things To Do.

I'm finding being back at work a struggle, which I don't remember happening last time. I think I'd been in a lot over the summer last time and felt sorted and chilled. This time I feel totally disorganised and disinclined to do much about it. The extension-wrangling continues apace at home, as does the slow process of moving rooms into other rooms whilst trying to clear out crap at the same time. I'm really knackered in the evenings now so it is slow progress. I think it's nearly time to hand over more stuff to matty cover person and find a quiet corner of school to get on with admin...

easyeggs how is DH? I read your posts just after my DH had read my posts about himself, and he gave me a letter defending his actions and telling me how I'd torn him apart with some of the things I'd said . I can't take anything back now, and he understands that I need somewhere to vent, so we managed to talk things through. He did point out that I'm a totally different person when I'm pg, and that it is hard to deal with. I had an inkling that this might be the case - although I feel totally rational and normal - just a bit more motivated to get stuff sorted than usual, and more easily frustrated by obstacles. I think DHs do get a touch of aversion to us and our fixations (and of another bout of impending fatherhood), but they, like us, get over it once the hormones are out of the way. I guess we all have to be a bit more tolerant. But that doesn't excuse that Easyegg's DH did the other day...

Packing now for the weekend, but have no motivation. What does one buy for those about to be CHristened? Will have to stop along the way. Also have a birthday present for a friend and new mum to buy too. Haven't seen a shop in so long I'm at a total loss!

Ok BBL It's got scary now.

Don't read the last few chapters too late Ninjacat

Skorpion hello from Shropshire! Whereabouts are / were you?

Ninja you made me laugh! Enjoy the scary bits!

I had a traumatic day yesterday. DS1 and I lost DS2 at the Shrewsbury Folk Festival. It was the worst 10 minutes of my life! Luckily this woman saw me looking distressed and asked if I'd lost a little boy and told me she'd seen him and taken him to the St John's Ambulence building. DS1 and I ran all the way and there he was, sitting, happily munching on a rich tea biscuit. He had a big tear on his cheek! They took my name and address so now I am worried they are going to send the baby police round to check up on me! Can someone so dippy be deemed a suitable mother?

Katster music is allowed. I made up a CD for DS1's birth but never actually got it out as totally forgot in the throws of giving birth!

Oh no BBL how scary for you. It really is the worst feeling in the world when you have lost them isn't it. I'm glad that he was fine and you found each other.

I'm struggling today. Did too much yesterday and am really hurting now. Didn't sleep well either as was so uncomfortable so that's making me feel worse. DH is taking me out for a meal tonight though as he was away all week so I'm looking forward to that. Hoping to go to a really nice pub that uses it's own fresh produce and changes the menu according to what it has in! Just need to see if we can get a table!

BBL We lost DS in a large deptartment store when I was a few weeks pregnant. It was the most scary moment of my life. We found him after a few mins, but it felt a very long time. I was a wreck for a couple of days after that. Glad you were reunited and he was ok.

I've woken today with terrible indigestion, I felt it coming on when I woke up last night for a wee. Without thinking I had some OJ for breakfast and regretted it ever since. I'm drinking milk but need to pop out shortly and buy Gaviscon. I had this with DS but near the end of the pg. Another joy of pregnancy!

Warning huge me me me post

I seem to be stuck in the weekend from hell!

Starts off Friday a friend came over with her ds (the same age as ds1) all the boys did was fight and then when we went to soft play some huge boy got hold of ds and was kicking him really hard, I ended up stepping in and shouting at the boy poor ds is covered in bruises

Then yesterday I gave up the day to help dh with a his new shed, I painted the whole thing while he pottered around doing ??? Anyway ds1 had gone to play with next door in their garden but kept coming home crying because they (neighbours kids and some from the next street) were picking on him, after him insisting on going back again dh and I listened and heard them teasing ds about the nightmares he'd been having (another story) they were being really mean and saying things that 7 and 9 year olds shouldn't be! ds came home crying so I went next door and had words, as I went to door the boy next door opened it and said oh have you come because of whats happened? followed by we didn't say anything!
After a chat with his mum said boy came around with mum in toe and mumbled a sorry!

Anyway today dh has been an arse getting me to lift and carry parts of the shed to help him despite my bad back(huge row followed)
Ds again insisted on playing with same kids and the bullying continued I've said no more!! I tried to talk to next door boy myself but he is so rude I had to walk away.

So sorry for rant, feel a bit better now its off my chest though

Tigger, I find having to deal with other people's kids one of the hardest things about being a parent. It's hard to see past the red rage when some little horror has just hurt your kid, and their parent is either nowhere in sight or doesn't seem to care (or worse, shouts at YOU for reprimanding THEM - London parents seem particularly bad for this). I'm so sorry for your poor little ds.

I've just heard that my friend has given birth at the hospital where I had DS, and had a bad time of it - a I-hope-they're-suing bad time of it. She woke up in a pool of blood, called an ambulance, and got told by some bored registrars that the maternity ward was busy, go home. It got worse from there, but I gather she's got a lovely little girl out of it. I am SO GLAD I decided to change hospitals because if I hear one more horror story about our local one...

Tigger poor you - I agree about OPCs - it can be really hard!!! Esp when they come to your house to play and they play up.

I'm really excited because I'm going to see The Proclaimers at the festival tomorrow. I love the Proclaimers!!! I have such a ecclectic (if that is how you spell it) taste in music. I have seen The Prclaimers three times so far - first time when I was at University and the second time I was 6 months pregnant. Strangely here I am again 6 months pregnant and seeing them again!

Tigger Your poor DS. I must say, I am not looking forward to dealing with other people's children either. HAve a feeling I will go into teacher mode, which probably won't go down too well!

Tamlin at your friend - how is she? Was she in a pool of blood at the hospital or at her house? OMG how terrifying....

BBL I love The Proclaiers too!!

Well, we have spent the weekend taking LOTS of old furniture/crap away and DH even attempted to put up the cot. I don't know if you remember me saying, but a few weeks ago we bought a load of baby items (Quinny, cot, bath, moses basket, monitor, playgym blah blah blah) from a friend of a friend, who has moved to the States. Anyway, the cot was part of the 'package' but it has pieces missing!! The two rods so the side can slide up and down, and one of the wooden poles that the mattress base fixes onto. In other words, it is totally useless without these bits. I don't know what to do. My friend who knows the original 'owner' (I have never met her) is a colleague from work who i've not seen/heard from since the end of the summer term and I am scared to go in next week and be like 'Hi, nice holiday? Good. Now about the cot...' But DH is really p*ssed off, as we did actually pay £380 for all the stuff and the cot was quite a big part of it. Plus, at the last minute, the woman said she wanted to keep her Maclaren pushchair and just knocked £20 off, so he was already annoyed by that.... Grrrrr. Never engage in financial dealings with friends/colleagues!!

Sorry that is a bit of an epic...

Thanks for the support, you're right dealing with OPC really is one of the worst parts of parenting, anyway I've decided to keep ds busy in our house/garden just the 3/4 of us until he goes back to school on Thursday.

tamlin your poor friend, I hope her and her dd are both ok, good job you changed hospitals!

kaster how why would someone sell something that isn't complete?? cots are can be so expensive to buy as well, maybe you can ask your colleague to give you her friends details so that you can ask her if she has the other parts? Have you checked all parts of the other bits you got in the package?

BBL have fun tomorrow! And so sorry to hear about your frightening experience with your ds!

Thanks Tigger. Yep we have turned everywhere upside down looking for them. Colleague is a little bit scary and I am not v good at being assertive so am a bit scared!! The instruction manual is a John Lewis one so DH suggested contacting them to see if we can order spare parts. Really annoying though.

Also, went to yoga this afternoon and there was a woman who was 38 weeks - she honestly looked about 8 stone and maybe 15 weeks... I was so