Due November 2009 - we just can't stop chatting!

[BeckyBendyLegs]

A new thread!

can u get PMT at 28 weeks?? feeling very 'grhhhhh' and in foul moood and just generally feeling bleurgh...wish men could get pregnant...

Oh my friend's water has broken, this afternoon, and her DP was not here so I went around, with another friend and we stayed with her and had chinese, I did some shopping for her, and made sure she had everything ready that she needed. And, her DP has just driven home from London, just arrived! He said 'got to go' to his colleagues, jumped in the van and drove back! broke down on the way mind and was 1.5 hours later than he should have been but still! There was him saying how he would not/could not be there, and he realised he just could not miss it!

We made them a cuppa, friend had her first contration about 20 mins before he got back so we briefed him while she had a shower, then left them to it.

Then we thought 'what if they did not want to just be left to it, neither has had a baby before, both of us girls have had a child and had someone as well as DP there, and we thought, maybe they might have not just wanted us to run away!!! {hmm] oh its so hard to do the right thing!

Well scarlotti, am staying at DP's from tomorrow night, so if you need a second hormonal woman to come round and kick-start him into action, give me call!! Enjoy the bitchy comments, they always make me feel SO much better

Raggie I don't really know, haven't done this before!! But I saw a few in town where you could record everything, like the baby's weight, and when they cut their first tooth and stuff, and just thought it was so sweet But I wanted to do it in my own way, so got a blank book instead of the ready made ones. Hair is very very very red, and the dye hasn't even set yet Though was SO funny - there was a hole in one of the containers, and mum squeezed it, and it went all over the kitchen Will definately put up pictures, to amuse you all

Weston lol - they wouldn't last a DAY! I sometimes wish that I was a seahorse - the males have to carry the baby's then!!! Hope you're evening gets better, feel free to rant if you need to!!

Pavlov ohhhh so exciting!!! Am very glad her DP decided he had to be there Keep us updated!!!

Scarlotti - my DH is exactly the same, keeps saying how I should take it easy (getting swollen ankles, loads of braxton hicks - which I get more when stressed, spd and generally knackered), but then does NOTHING to help. He told me I should go to bed sunday aft, but i told him i had too much that needed doing round the house - his aswer was that i could do that when i got up?! I think he believes cause this is the third time i've done this it must be easy and to just leave me to it, but actually it's harder as I have a 13month old and a 2.5yr old to look after too, I also wish he'd show more interest in the baby and things we needed for it - I've just got on and sorted everything myself - feels a bit lonely at times.

Scarlotti, I can totally understand you. It's very annoying that he announces something and then does the complete opposite. Mine is very similar. Did never say to take it easy as I do not really have problems. But he can easily come home late because of work for a couple of days and then he has to go out with his friends, just for one beer because after all, he hasn't been "really" out since a couple of weeks. (The fact that I have not been "really" out (whatever that means exactely) since 6 months does seem to be a different problem.) But then he doesn't come home until 3am. In fact, at the moment he is still sleeping, although we should leave in 10min to visit a flat and it has been almost impossible to fix that viewing.
What annoys me most is that very often he says that he will come home immediately after work eventhough his friends will meet for a beer and then he calls me again, that finally he has decided to go there too but just for one. If I'm lucky he then calls me again that for some reason he has to stay longer. I would prefer if he could just tell me right from the beginning, that he would like to go out and that I should not count on him for dinner.

Morning,

beepbeep I'm completley with you on feeling very alone with regards to this pregnancy, Dh comes in from work and 1st thing he says is what a stressful day he has had, followed by whats for dinner I'm starving! If I get stressed he says I should take it easy, but he never takes the the children or offers to do anything around the house! And as far as sorting things for the baby... he came pram shopping, but i'm sure that was so he could keep an eye on what I spent!
Rant Over sorry

erika wow at the red hair, you must post some pictures

pav any news on your frind yet? Oh and I think you did the right thing, your friend and her dh will be just fine and you were there when she needed you
raggie Don't get too hung up on your due date, with my 1st I had 2 dates lmp date and scan date which was 2 days later, ds was born a week before the scan date (5 days before lmp date) Your baby will come when he/she decides and as long as he/she is growing well and is healthy there is nothing you can do! Just make sure you are ready (bags packed etc) by the 1st date!

scarlotti hope you are ok this morning, men....what can I say! they really do have no idea.

Better get dressed, got to go to ASDA

Skorpion and Beepbeep I nearly gave birth in that lift! There was no way DH and random nurse from the hospital downstairs would have got me up the stairs - as soon as they bundled me into the delivery room DS2's head appeared!

Katster don't loose heart - when you have little one / ones and you are pregnant again you do cope, you just do. You might not feel so rotten the next time - who knows? And I think the desire for another for some people is so strong they do it and just cope and afterwards you forget the hard times. And there is always naps and Cbeebies for breaks and DHs and mother-in-laws and friends, etc.

Beepbeep I feel alone too - DH forgets I am pregnant and remembers only when something goes wrong like my back the other week (now I am back on bin-emptying duties, carrying shopping, carrying washing, carrying hoover). At first they are brilliant at being understanding and doing all the house work when you're feeling sick but nine months is a long time - novelty wears off quickly!

Weston I feel hormonal too I've just got too much to do and not enough time.

Anyway, we're off to our local drop-in now. Laters!

scarlotti sorry tho hear about this. I know it's too late now, but I would caution against resolving tension without face to face contact. Written messages can be taken in the wrong way and blown out of proportion. I hope you get a chance to talk things over and it will all be better.

I told you the book is a bit on the hippy side. There's a birthing story where a woman says a mantra, something on the lines of 'you're going to get huuuge' during the dilation stage. It helped her apparently...

erika I manage to sneak cake into the house and have a couple of pieces a day at least. Well, actually it's not me sneaking it in, we had guests over last weekend and they left loads behind. As a rule we usually don't have sweets in the house, but I have developed a mega sweet tooth recently. I heard somewhere that you do that with a girl, at least this old wives' tale is true in my case. I also noticed that I can't eat as much, well, I can but I shouldn't. There's not enough room in there. Unfortunately this doesn't stop my greed and I then feel uncomfortable...

I agree with the novelty wearing off for the men, in the first few weeks dh was like "oh you mustn't pick up anything too heavy", but had to anyway cos otherwise nothing would get done, now he doesnt care, like you BBL am back on bin-bag duties and just carried out two full to the brim bins out. He does care, but he's definately not as attentive as he was with the first.

Doughnuts seem to keep finding their way into the house (and strawberries do actually) they also disappear quickly too!

keep getting this really painful trapped wind at night, starting to get to me as there doesnt seem to be anything i can do to get rid of it once it starts up.

Thanks for all the lovely messages, it's so nice to know I'm not the only one with a less than brilliant DH!
I resisted the urge to send any bitchy comments via text, or say anything when he rolled in at 12:45 (agree with you skorpion). Kept my tongue for most of the morning routine and then just talked about it a little as I was dropping him off at work (we car share). Told him I was disappointed at being let down, and that he always says one thing and does another.
He apologised and said he wasn't trying to win 'crap husband of the year' award.
We shall now see what happens...

Normally he's quite good when i'm pregnant, but then rubbish when the baby arrives in terms of night waking/feeding etc. and tends to leave all that to me. Was a bit of a shock last time, but this time I'm more prepared I guess - not sure it's right though, and often wonder how these women with hubby's that get up all hours and are active participants in the house managed to get one like that!

Trikken I find fizzy pop the only relief if I get bad trapped wind, flavour is irrelevant, but good and gassy to get things moving.

As for baby books, I bought one for DS (and then felt guilty so bought one for DD even though she was then 11!) and both are still sitting in the cupboard! I think I managed to fill in the first few sections before I forgot about it. Maybe I'll get them out on mat leave and try and remember what should be in them!

ooh thanks scarlotti, I'd not thought of that but seems very logical.

Well ladies... My hair is most definately RED. It has been this bright before, but not for a long time. I'll make sure to take some pictures this weekend so you can all see just how vivid it is

Skorpion well I tend to be craving these delicious buggers (Yes, I am eating another caramel chunky...) tinned peaches, and cheese and onion crisps... And also McDonalds on occassion So I have a combination of sweet and savoury things going on, and he is DEFINATELY a boy according to the scan!! I do enjoy old wives tales, though, they're good fun.

Trikken same advice as Scarlotti, only she beat me to it Also helps if you have a bout of feeling sick, I find.

I'm sorry to hear about all the men that are acting like... Well, men! I hope they all start helping out a bit more. x

Antenatal class this afternoon and then a meeting with the adult physc. team - oh joys. There's like a two hour gap, so somehow have to occupy myself. Think I might go up to the hospital early and get coffee...

Just bought a BabaSling on eBay - managed to get it for £17 and they retail for £39 It's only been used a few times indoors so in great condition. Am hoping it's going to help with the breastfeeding, especially when we're out.

Don't you just love eBay for picking up other people's impulse purchases!!

anyone developed headaches in the last few days?? not a big fan of final trimester so far....

Ladies, just had to come in and share - I've been getting really uncomfy for a few days, with the little one squirming like mad and making mexican waves... to the point where I was (again) getting slightly worried as he never seemed to NOT be moving around. Also, when I went to bed I found it really hard to breathe, just kept feeling like I was choking. WELL, last night I was talking to my StepMIL and she said that maybe he's trying to shift and he's a bit stuck or something. I then remembered reading about being on all fours and how good that is for the baby, so I watched TV on all fours for nearly an hour and jiggled my hips every so often. Guess what? The squirming stopped, and when I went to bed I found that I could breathe! I've slept really well, and my bump doesn't feel anywhere near as tight and uncomfy as it did yesterday. It's AMAZING! Now, it could all just be a coincidence, but I really think that it helped. Will be doing that every night from now on! (Also - what a fab excuse: I'm not being a slob watching BB, I'm busy turning the baby!)

Woke up this morning to find that my boobs have started to leak milk. MOOOOOOOO!

Scarlotti I'm very impressed with the way you dealt with your DH. So very calm, mature, and most of all un-pregnant! Well done on the babasling too!

Erika Reading that made me get an urge to go to the shops for tinned peaches! Must have peaches! I really like the idea of a babybook - I did actually read through mine when I was visiting my mom this summer, she's still got it.

Tigger How funny - that's the only time my DH's ears prick up or he gets animated about the babystuff: when he wants to know / moan about the cost. Feels really unfair. Must confess that my childish revenge was to forget to mention the HIP and pay off my credit card with it...

Beepbeep I really don't think they get that we're CONSTANTLY preggers. We're in the process of moving bedrooms as well as decorating the bean's room, and the other day I had to point out to him that I'm physically not able (nor willing) to start shifting heavy furniture like wardrobes and beds. I'm sure I could do it, but then what if something happened? I just don't want to risk it. Also told him that while I realise he must feel like I'm not pulling my weight, I'd gladly swap for a week or so, so that he could carry the bump and be pregnant and I could move all the furniture in the world (and go playing, oh, and have a drink...)

Is it silly that I keep looking at the newly arrived baby bath and going all gooey? It's so teensy, and sweet, and it's got little grips at the bottom so his little bum won't slide around. Aaaaawwww.

broodzilla what a great tip! I'll certainly remember that. My resident was squirming like a loon all the time from lunch to bed yesterday. I don't think she's got too little room, as I'm only coming up to 26 weeks, but it was the first time when I could feel her constantly. I really like the feeling incidentally and already think I'll miss it... Mind you, I've not been punched in the ribs yet, so can't really say I know it all

broodzilla that's a good tip. I had to sleep in the spare room last night as was awake till after three with pain in my ribs and just couldn't get comfy.

I was really pleased with myself as I have bought my first bit of baby stuff. I ordered a Kari me sling off the Internet but I think I'm going to have to practise with a doll or something as just ended up getting very hot and tying myself into a bit of a knot!

I find it amazing the emails I get telling me what should be happening at each stage of pregnancy are so spot on. I'd started to worry as baby's movements have calmed down a bit only to find an email telling me not to worry if this happened at 29 weeks as it meant baby is getting bigger and there's not much room left. I've also been drinking gallons of milk and really craving yoghurt, cheese and eggs and apparently this week is when baby starts depositing loads of calcium!

Hi everyone! Good to see we're all chatting away as much as ever. Sorry to hear all about the difficult DH's. I think it's really hard for them to remember that we are pregnant ALL THE BLOODY TIME. So they have a little spurt of being helpful and empathetic adn then they just go back to normal. Mine has been quite good recently, the real issues were much more in the first trimester when I had really miserable fatigue, nausea and vomiting (I refuse to call it 'morning' sickness)and he kept pushing me to do so much more than I could really do and ignoring my pleas for time off on the weekends. Now he is much more reasonable but he can't seem to get his head around the fact that I need to walk much slower than before - I tend to find him about 10 paces ahead of me and oblivious to the fact I am lagging behind and breathless. I've taken to calling him 'Usain Bolt' which occasionally seems to have an effect....
Pavlov - how exciting with your friend! Any news yet?
Broodzilla, thanks for the tip and pleased to hear you found some relief from the endless acrobatics we are all enduring at the moment. I read somewhere that soon our little ones will stop moving around as much as they run out of space?

Evening all. hope everyone has had an ok day. I have just been eating a packet of Oreo's, which probably shouldnt as have eaten sooo much junk today already.

am getting impatient, want 11 weeks to go as quick as poss now.

Hi all, had the worst moment of my life today: I think my heart actually stopped beating for a minute- my son fell down the stairs. He went about ten steps, head first, just after I had said 'please be careful'. I couldn't grab him in time to stop him falling. Fortunately he is fine, though we did take him up to Casualty to make sure.
When we got there he was babbling away very lucidly, all his colour was back and he just had a little bump on his head. I, on the other hand, was a pale, gibbering wreck and could easily have lain down on one of the beds and asked to be commited for the next ten weeks.
What a nightmare, I think those moments on the stairs will be with me until my dying day. Well up every time I think of them. DH has been fab, I rang him at work absolutely hysterical and he managed to get away and come straight home. I think DHs can rise to the occasion when need be- earlier today I was going to add my voice to all the complaints that they (DH/DPs) just don't get this pregnancy thing. I still think they just don't really understand the day in, day out misery (physical, hormonal, mental) that can come with a pg. But God I was soooo glad to see DH today!!!
Could really have done with a large glass of wine this evening. And a cigarette! Making do with a cup of decaffeinated tea and some cookies.

committed even. (I'm not really an English teacher )

OMG Wook you poor thing! I just logged on to have a rant about DH who managed to reduce me to tears over dinner but that quickly paled into it's own pathetic insignificance compared to your day. I'm so, so sorry to hear about the accident, but so very happy to hear your DS is doing fine. (Maybe there's some truth in the saying that drunks and kids don't get hurt when they fall as they don't tense up?) He's clearly got a guardian angel by his side!
Also glad that your DH stepped up to the "occasion" and that you felt supported. While I'm very much in the "no booze while pregnant" camp, I really do think tonight of all nights you could treat yourself to one big glass of wine.

Big hugs. I'm sure we'll all be thinking of you tonight! Take care.

BeepBeep I totally understand the 'lonely' feeling- just having to get on and organise/think of/shop for/get excited about everything alone, even if DH/DP is actually there too! I remember the first time, going around looking at nursery things, clothes etc and even when he was even with me still feeling as though I was the only one who actually really did care. Because, really, I was! To DH all prams, babygros, sleeping bags etc were alike.

If anything, this time it has been worse -bonding/interest in baby wise-as last time I managed to persuade DH to talk to the bump quite often and in the end he even read it a story (Guess How Much I Love You) each night for the last couple of weeks-that was fun for him as though dh felt a total prat at first, ds would always move straight over to where his voice was and I think this made DH really chuffed. This time we are just both so busy and stressed there's no time for any soppy nonsense!
As for nausea, pain, tiredness, SPD, feminine moisture issues, stretch marks, insomnia, hormonal wibbles etc- I guess we can describe them but until you have those things yourself (all at once of course!) you don't really know how they feel.
Remember when I was pg with ds there was a quite strange prog on TV with Davina McCall called 'He's having a baby' - focusing on a group of dads to be who were all having August babies (like us). It was quite interesting, but I will never forget there was a couple on one show where the woman had the baby early in the day, then was let out and they filmed the couple the next morning: HE was sitting on his bum, SHE, having given birth the day before, was making HIM a bacon sandwich!!!!!! Either she was a wonderwoman or he was a bit of a pig!

Broodzilla thanks so much. What happened with DH? Hope all OK now. I wish men, colleagues etc could all go on compulsory ante natal courses to learn how to be kind and understanding to pregnant wives, workmates etc!