Due April 2009 - Chapter 31: Kitty's birthing in Bolero, Diamonds and Stilletos with Champagne in hand!!!! She likes to Moooove it!! Moo-ve it!!

[NuttyBlowUpEasterBunny]

here we go again!!!!

Yeah but I don't know if it will be covered as we did the bathroom ourselves - am trying to work out from the small print now! It is the most beautiful solid oak table you have ever seen - a completely impractical purchase when I could barely afford to furnish the house when I moved in let alone spend the ridiculous money I did on that but I do love it and we use it all the time!

Bleu, Kara's are a kind of yellow-green poo and believe me Kara is getting enough hind milk - he drains me every time - to the point where I have to move him over because he is no longer getting anything out of it - just drips!

Ok Kara is still sleeping - for once he is sensing when not to wake up - think we are going to stay over at mums tonight and DH will fix it and I will come back tomorrow but aibu to be really that I will spend a night apart from DH - God am so soppy since this boy was born!

Springy just realised my spelling error - am not calling your DH a Sh*tHead (SH!) just rubbish at typing today!

Ok have night clothes, nappies, dirty nappies (might as well use their washing machine) day clothes, socks, creams, about 12 vests and 6 baby gros, moses basket, blankets, car seat, sling, need to find lansinoh, chnage of clothes for me, bed clothes, what else do I need?

So I no longer have a ceiling - it fell on to the table but had lots of towels down so don't think it is damaged but I have a 3m by 2m hole in my ceiling - Kara and mummy are crying from the noise and mess! - Makes the OJ stain seem a bit minor!

Just had a visit from MW and I was left a bit . I was glad she came as I had been having problems getting DD2 to latch on and stuff today and I could see she was getting jaundice. So she has helped me with latch and said to make sure she has a feed every 3 hours during the day. BUT she came in and was quite obviously looking at the mess. I appologised about it all but she was just very - although didn't actually say anything but was obvious she was judging. She then asked me how old DD1 was and when I said 16 months she came me a really funny look and I said "I know, must be mad" in a jokey way. She was still very about it all and said "Maybe it would best to have a bigger age group". She obviously didn't approve but I don't see how she can get funny about ME having a small age gap in my children?! I can do what the hell I like (although neither were actually planned and in some ways I agree, but it is none of her buissness!!!). I guess it was because the house was a mess, but it wasn't dangerously messy and isn't DIRTY, just toy everywhere, hospital bag still unpacked but overflowing in the corner. Stuff like that. Nothing that is remotly going to affect the baby.

She also said to baby "Lucky I came or poor baby would have been starved" because I wasn't getting a good latch with the BF. My opinion on this is that:
a) that is what she is there for
b) somebody was meant to come yesterday
c) I told her on the phone yesterday that I needed BF help
d) she was definatly getting milk - it was pooring out. She wasn't getting latched on very well so it would take longer and was more painful for me, but she certainly wasn't starving.

ARGH. sorry to rant, she just really annoyed me

like you would have starved the poor thing anyway

soon2be that is awful there job is to SUPPORT you not judge you - tell her to come to my housei e half a ceiling on the floor, dirt everywhere and no water or heating - would like to see what the cow has to say about that!!!

how is dd2s weight gain?
what do they expect from a new mum with a toddler!

stupid woman - forget about it and enjoy dd2 - dont worry about cleaning - it will happen when your ready!

Hi all, Can't believe you are all still busy posting. Sorry for long post but feel the need to share.

I have had a hellish first 2 weeks and I've had my mum staying so I have not had to do any cooking or cleaning. Adam is very well versed on torture techniques of mutilation and sleep deprivation.

Have struggled with breast feeding. No problems with DD and managed to continue for 6 months so never even considered that it might be difficult. When he was a week I went to breastfeeding clinic where I had a 1 hour consultation. However my nipples were already badly damaged.

I was getting at most 2 hours sleep at a stretch. He was feeding for about 2 hours and sleeping at most 2 hours.

On Friday his poohs were still black and he was not gaining weight. That night I tried to express milk to give my nipples a rest. I produced a very small amount of pink milk (bleeding nipples) and thought 'I can't feed him tonight' so I got in the car at 10 pm - missed Tesco closing by 20 minutes but managed to get formula in Sainsburys which closed at 11.

It has been emotionally and physically very draining. I wanted to breastfeed but it was not working for me, for Adam or for my daughter (I think she was getting tired of me saying I'm feeding Adam)or for my husband who has been on the sofa to get sleep so he could go to work and be available for DD.

Anyway the change to formula combined with expressed milk has changed our lives. Time to start enjoying my little boy

exactly! I knew she wasn't latching properly but she was getting milk and I had asked for her help.

Saying that, today she just doesn't want to be put down. Typical as DH has taken DD1 for a walk into work to sort his paternity pay out and my plan was to have a quick tidy up and hoover, then have a lie down or just relax till they got back. They won't be that long so looks like I won't get a chance!

By the way Soon2be just read your message. I think a lot is taken for granted when you have already had a baby but I've just realised just because you have had one already doesn't mean you don't need support 2nd or 3rd time around. As for the house I dread to think what mine would be like if I didn't have my mum staying.

rest is more important than a tidy house.

BB - I have no idea about weight, they didn't weigh her, which suprised me. She said she would come back on Wednesday to do it.

Thanks guys. You have made me feel a bit better about it all.

Nutty, meant to say, I have also passed clots etc like what you describe and I am sure it is normal. I had loads last time and the MWs were not worried so I didn't bother to mention this time.

I have just done my first poo too. Hurt a bit but no more than after a bit of consipation iyswim.

DD2 is now really lifting her head when she is on our chests on her front. She looks so funny, Remind me of the baby dinosaur in jurasic (however you spell it) park!!! LOL.

geez... Im glad I didn't have that mw or I'd have been in tears having to deal with that as well as the poor bf issues.
So rude of her. I'd ask to never see her again.

Not to sound overly pleased at others pain and unhappiness, but I am so glad it's not just me who's finding the bf difficult and painful. I hope we all find happy solutions to our problems! Speaking of which I'm thinking of going to the gp to see if i can get some stronger painkillers so that I can have some relief from my breast discomfort.

I think it is her that is coming back on wednesday. TBH it didn't seem THAT bad at the time, although I did keep thinking that was odd and felt very uncomfortable. It was only when she left and I really started to think about it and I though that is not on.

Oh well. could have been worse - could have been MIl that came round! LOL.

Having a lie down in front of telly now before dg gets back with DD1

hi everyone.

sorry to be absent for a while but was finding all these false starts last week (mine not anyone elses) to be pretty depressing, and coming on here was making me obsess about the whole thing, so I decided to take a wee break.

Havent caught up properly yet but see that purplemonkey,and lots of others have popped since I was last on so congratulations to you all. Purplemonkey - cant believe you made it all the way to 10cm with no pain relief - wow - guess there was no need to compete for the water birth after all.

as you can guess - I've still not popped but have a sweep tomorrow and given the amount of contractions or at least painful bh I've had, I think I've probably at least started.

Anyway - sorry its a me me post - I will try and catch up properly.

BB - - how crappy of your ceiling. At least it is presumably a small slow leak rather than an enormous gushing one . Plumbing really is the business to be in!

Soon2be - at the 'baby would have starved' comment. What an awful judgy bitch! And how could she make a good assessment without weighing dd?? It's amazing how many MWs there are out there who don't seem to like people!

I've probably been judged like nobody's business - everytime mw has visited, all my hospital stuff, Bounty packs etc have been in exactly the same place, still unpacked. Plus, there appear to be breast pads everywhere. I don't think I notice judging as am such a slattern!

Purlease - glad the feeding is working for you now. It's incredible how difficult bfing is for so many people - how people got on with it in the days before good bf support (and before formula) is beyond me!

HV has just been to do measuring etc. She said exactly the same thing about a return to green poos indicating baby not getting enough hindmilk.

Have been discharged by midwives. I am mostly about it, as it means all is well, but also a little as it was quite comforting knowing they were coming!

Goodness, it takes forever to post!

bleu- its not just you
I have thrush on one side and its agony

Hi all, catching up a little.

SPRINGY - As a 3rd time mum, can I offer what helped me? DD1 LITERALLY screamed all night every night until she was 12 weeks old. All that would pacify her was hard patting on the back, sat upright.

At first we did the dark room, minimal stimulation thing, and we were both exhausted. DD was fine because she caught up in the day.

What worked for me was:
-DH slept downstairs so he was able to support me in the evenings. If DD hadn't settled by 4 am, I took her down, & DH had her for 2.5 hours before work, so I had at least some sleep.

-I made up a song, and while I was winding DD, I sang it LOUD over and over, to remind myself I loved her, and drown out her cries. I knew I was doing all I could.

-I tried to sleep when she slept at least once per day.

-I resigned myself to the nights & accepted that is how they would be.

Over the 12 weeks she gradually settled at 4am, then 3am, then 1am, until at 12 weeks she just went down at 7pm! She woke for feeds but went straight down after.

With DDs 2& now 3, I decided nothing could be that bad.

I set myself up with a snack, drink & puzzle book etc for the night, and when DD3 wakes, I turn the light on FULL, get my snack book, etc and make the most of it. I find that then I lose track of time & before I know it DD is ready to sleep again.

DD2 slept through at 5 weeks, in the end, although it didn't last.

DD3 is a night-shift worker like DD1, but it seems less bad with my coping strategies.

I've been discharged too. Saw midwife twice and only then because I left hospital same day.

BTW people dont forget to claim your tax credits/child benefit

Oh and sign the form I forgot on the hip

Blueravin - i know what you mean about feeling better knowing others feel the same way

Everyone kept telling me that because DS was bigger than DD, he would be more difficult to feed. Even though I have given in, I still don't accept that it is down to size. DS just wasn't latching on properly and then it got to the stage where my nipples were so raw that I couldn't feed him .

Juwesm - I was discharged today also. I also have mixed feelings.

Conker - best of luck - hope to hear announcement soon.

Thanks for hugs Nutty

BTW - heres the birth story

Hi all, not been around in a while.

Sam Martin was born last Tuesday (on his due date!) at 1:18am at home, weighing 7lb 9oz. He came out like Superman (one arm up) so I needed 3 stitches. MW's were lovely and hands off, as I requested. Very tired now but am managing to nap when DS1 naps. I'd go for a home birth every time - so much more relaxed and in control, and hospital only 10 minutes away if needed.

Congratulations to all those who've hatched, and best wishes to all those who haven't.